Harry and Riley and The Chamber of Secrets
by Golden Quintet
Summary: Join the Marauders minus Peter, Lily, Dakota, Molly, Arthur, Frank, Alice and some guests as they read Book Two of their childrens' adventures at Hogwarts.
1. The Worst Birthday Ever

_**A/N Book two!**_

_**I don't own Harry Potter, just Riley, Thomas, and Dakota.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

"Do you think they're awake?"

"Yes."

"You do?"

"Of course not!"

"Will you two shut up?"

"We're pulling a Dobby!"

"Yeah, Major Déjà vu."

"Should we wake them?"

"Not sure, it's like 8:37 in the morning, that's pretty early."

"For you!"

"Shut up!"

"Can I have cookie now?"

"In a minute kiddo."

"Guys! They're waking up."

Lily, Dakota, James, Sirius, Remus, Arthur, Molly, Alice, and Frank woke up to the sound of five teenagers the oldest one nineteen to the youngest one being eighteen bickering.

"And we woke them…" said one of the girls with brown bushy hair.

"No kidding," said one of the boys that looked like a carbon copy of Remus minus the scars who was holding a turquoise haired toddler.

"Who the heck are you guys?" James asked before putting on his glasses.

"Gee I thought they would have recognized us by now," the redheaded boy said.

Dakota squinted at the boy with jet black hair. She saw a lightning scar on his forehead and gasped.

"L-Lily that's Harry," she said pointing to the boy.

Lily's eyes widened, so did James's. They ran over to Harry.

"Mum, Dad," Harry said.

Lily and James hugged Harry.

The black haired girl sighed and said, "As you can see that's Harry freakin' Potter, the redhead is Ron Weasley, the one with the bushy brown hair is Hermione Granger, they one holding the toddler is Thomas Lupin, the toddler is Teddy, and I'm the awesome Riley Black."

There was silence and then;

"RILEY!"

"MUMMY!" Riley cried running into her mother's arms.

"What about me?" Sirius said. Riley ran into his arms.

"Hello dad," Thomas said.

"Hello," Remus mumbled.

"Dad, you know I'm not disappointed in you right? I love you dad."

Remus smiled and said, "I love you too Thomas."

"Hi mum! Hey dad!" Ron said.

Molly smacked the back of his head and said, "That's for being a git."

Frank and Alice awkwardly talked with Hermione.

"Not to dampen the mood, but whose kid is this?" James asked pointing towards Teddy.

Everyone minus Ron, Harry, and Thomas looked at Hermione and Riley. Hermione and Riley shook their heads.

"None of us have kids yet," Hermione said.

"Let's just say he's technically part of our generation and we're babysitting him for a few days." Riley said.

"So he's Peter's kid." Sirius asked.

"We won't tell you. You'll find out later." Thomas answered

"Okay how did you get here?" Alice asked.

"We can't tell you and Riley knows a guy." Harry said.

"Should we be concerned Riley knows a guy?" Arthur asked.

"Yes." Ron said flatly.

Riley picked up book two and shoved it in Remus's hands and said, "Read."

Hermione and Thomas started to pass out breakfast to everyone.

"**Harry and Riley and the Chamber of Secrets; Chapter One; The Worst Birthday Ever**." Remus read.

"Cookie!" Teddy exclaimed.

"Oh right," Riley said grabbing cookie out of Hermione's purse and handing it to him.

**Not for the first time, an argument had broken out over breakfast at number four, Privet Drive. Mr. Vernon Dursley had been woken in the early hours of the morning by a loud, hooting noise from Harry and Riley's room.**

"**Third time this week!" he roared across the table. "If you can't control that owl, it'll have to go!"**

"Where would it go is the question," Frank said.

"I don't think Muggles sell owls at yard sales.

"They don't." Lily said.

**Harry tried, yet again, to explain.**

"**Their bored," he said. "They're used to flying around outside. If we could just let them out at night -"**

"**Do I look stupid?" snarled Uncle Vernon, a bit of fried egg dangling from his bushy mustache. **

"Definitely," James said.

"**Yes," Riley answered hiding it in coughs.**

"That's my niece."

"Thanks Uncle James." Riley said.

"You do know he's not your Uncle, right?" Dakota asked.

"Well he should be," Riley said getting a high five from James.

"**I know what'll happen if that owl's let out."**

"They'll peck your eyeballs out?" Sirius guessed.

**He exchanged dark looks with his wife, Petunia.**

**Harry tried to argue back but his words were drowned by a long, loud belch from the Dursleys' son, Dudley.**

"Disgusting!" Lily exclaimed.

**"I want more bacon."**

"**Oh Dudley, what would we do without you and your manners?" asked Riley sarcastically.**

"Skip around and sing a happy song," Frank answered.

"**There's more in the frying pan, sweetums," said Aunt Petunia, turning misty eyes on her massive son. "We must build you up while we've got the chance… I don't like the sound of that school food…"**

"**Nonsense Petunia, I never went hungry when I was at Smeltings,"**

"And look where he is today." Dakota said.

"Actually I'm not sure where they are now," Harry said, "I'm pretty sure Dudley lives in the same town we used to live in."

**said Uncle Vernon heartily. "Dudley gets enough, don't you, son?"**

**Dudley, who was so large his bottom drooped over either side of the kitchen chair**

"Lovely description," Hermione said.

**, grinned and turned to Harry.**

"**Pass the frying pan."**

"**You've forgotten the magic word," said Harry irritably.**

Riley groaned remembering that moment.

"Uh – oh," Arthur said.

**The effect of this simple sentence on the rest of the family was incredible: Dudley gasped and fell off his chair with a crash that shook the whole kitchen; Riley smacked the back Harry's head;**

Harry rubbed the back of his head.

**Mrs. Dursley gave a small scream and clapped her hands to her mouth; Mr. Dursley jumped to his feet, veins throbbing in his temples.**

"Over react much?" Alice grumbled.

"**I meant 'please'!" said Harry quickly. "I didn't mean —"**

"**WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU," thundered his uncle, spraying spit over the table, "ABOUT SAYING THE 'M' WORD IN OUR HOUSE?"**

"I wonder what the 'M' word is," Sirius said, "Monkey?"

"Marmalade?" James guessed

"Motorcycle?" Ron guessed.

"Magic," Harry said annoyed.

"Shush Harry the adults are talking," Thomas said, "Moose?"

"Mammoth," Riley guessed, "Oh wait I was there…"

"**But I —"**

"**HOW DARE YOU THREATEN DUDLEY!" roared Uncle Vernon, pounding the table with his fist.**

"I know therapist he can see about those anger issues," Hermione said.

"Why would you know a therapist?" Lily asked.

"My Grandpa Joe went a bit crazy a few years ago."

"**I just —"**

"**I WARNED YOU! I WILL NOT TOLERATE MENTION OF YOUR ABNORMALITY UNDER THIS ROOF!"**

"**ABNORMALITY? YOU THREE ARE THE ABNORMAL ONES!" shouted Riley.**

"Where would Harry be without his friends?" Molly asked.

"Dead," Ron said.

Everyone laughed except for Harry, Ron, Thomas, Hermione, and Riley.

"Ron wasn't kidding…" Harry said.

There was an awkward silence in the room.

**Harry stared from his purple-faced uncle to his pale aunt, who was trying to heave Dudley to his feet.**

"**All right," said Harry, "all right…"**

**Uncle Vernon sat back down, breathing like a winded rhinoceros**

"Lovely," Remus said.

**and watching Harry and Riley closely out of the corners of his small, sharp eyes.**

**Ever since Harry and Riley had come home for the summer holidays, Uncle Vernon had been treating them like a bomb that might go off at any moment, because Harry Potter and Riley Black weren't a normal boy and a normal girl. As a matter of fact, they were as not normal as it is possible to be.** **Harry Potter and Riley Black were a wizard and a witch **— **a wizard and witch fresh from their first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.**

"A very interesting year if I do say myself," Thomas said.

"Much better then fifth year," Hermione said.

Riley nodded and said, "I personally liked third year best."

All three of them took a quick glance at Remus and Sirius.

**And if the Dursleys were unhappy to have them back for the holidays, it was nothing to how Harry and Riley felt.**

**They missed Hogwarts so much it was like having a constant stomachache. **

Thomas and Remus exchanged glances. Riley mocked her suspicious glance she hadn't down in years.

**They missed the castle, with its secret passageways and ghosts, their classes (though perhaps not Snape, the Potions master), the post arriving by owl, eating banquets in the Great Hall, sleeping in their four-poster beds in the tower dormitories, visiting the gamekeeper, Hagrid, in his cabin next to the Forbidden Forest in the grounds, and, especially, Quidditch,** **the most popular sport in the wizarding world (six tall goal posts, four flying balls, and fourteen players on broomsticks).**

"What about your friends?" Remus asked.

Ron, Hermione, and Thomas crossed their arms.

"Yes, what about your friends?" Ron asked.

**All Harry and Riley's spellbooks, their wands, robes, cauldrons, and top-of-the-line Nimbus Two Thousand broomsticks had been locked in a cupboard under the stairs by Uncle Vernon the instant Harry and Riley had come home. What did the Dursleys care if Harry lost his place on the House Quidditch team and Riley lost her place as beater reserve because they hadn't practiced all summer?**

"They wouldn't knock you two off the team," Molly said.

**What was it to the Dursleys if Harry and Riley went back to school without any of their homework done**

"I think they would exception," Lily said.

**(not that Riley minded)**

"Oh you would mind," Arthur said, "Remember the last kid that didn't have an excuse for not doing their summer homework."

"Oh yeah, No Butt Greg!" Sirius exclaimed.

**? The Dursleys were what wizards called Muggles (not a drop of magical blood in their veins)**

"That can't be true Lily's a witch and Muggleborns always have some tie to magic in their blood, like if one of their ancestors is a Squib," Remus explained.

**, and as far as they were concerned, having a wizard in the family was a matter of deepest shame. **

**Uncle Vernon had even padlocked Harry and Riley's owls, Hedwig and Midnight, inside their cages, to stop them from carrying messages to anyone in the wizarding world.** **Harry looked nothing like the rest his of the family. Uncle Vernon was large and neckless, with an enormous black mustache; Aunt Petunia was horse-faced and bony; Dudley was blond, pink, and porky.**

"What a beautifully ugly description," Frank said.

**Harry, on the other hand, was small and skinny**

"He still is," Ron coughed.

Harry glared at him.

**, with brilliant green eyes and jet-black hair that was always untidy.**

"I was never able to flatten it, I still can't," Riley said with a pout.

**He wore round glasses, and on his forehead was a thin, lightning-shaped scar. It was this scar that made Harry so particularly unusual, even for a wizard. This scar was the only hint of Harry's very mysterious past, of the reason he had been left on the Dursleys' doorstep eleven years before with Riley.** **At the age of one year old, Harry had somehow survived a curse from the greatest Dark sorcerer of all time, Lord Voldemort,** **whose name most witches and wizards still feared to speak. **

"Ron," Harry coughed.

"That was years ago," Harry said.

**Riley who had absolutely no relation to the Dursley's was tall and skinny, with beautiful grey eyes, and black wavy hair that went down to her lower back. She had no idea why she lived with the Dursleys and Harry.**

"Well that didn't hurt at all," Harry said sarcastically.

**Not that Harry's a bad thing, he's one Riley's best friends. Sometimes she just wondered if she had any relatives. She knew she possibly was related to her worst enemy, Draco Malfoy and his family.**

Riley and Sirius booed.

**And then there was her father, who was a mass murderer put and jail around the time her mother died.**

Riley looked sheepishly at the floor. Sirius looked at his hands. Dakota stared at her future husband and daughter.

"What an awkward family moment." Alice said, "Moments to savor for the rest of your life."

**Harry's parents and Riley's mother had died in Voldemort's attack, but Harry** **had escaped with his lightning scar and Riley without a scratch, and somehow — nobody understood why —Voldemort's powers had been destroyed the instant he had failed to kill Harry. So Harry and Riley had been brought up by Harry's dead mother's sister and her husband. They had spent ten years with the Dursleys, never understanding why they kept making odd things happen without meaning to, believing the Dursleys' story that Harry had got his scar in the car crash that had killed his parents and Riley's mother.**

**And then, exactly a year ago, Hogwarts had written to Harry and Riley, and the whole story had come out. Harry and Riley had taken up their places at wizard school, where Harry and his scar were famous… but now the school year was over, and he and Riley were back with the Dursleys for the summer, back to being treated like a dog that had rolled in something smelly.**

"That was offence," Sirius said.

"Double offensive," Riley said.

**The Dursleys hadn't even remembered that today happened to be Harry's twelfth birthday. They hadn't even remembered Riley's back in April. Of course, Harry's hopes hadn't been high; they'd never given him or Riley a real present, let alone a cake — but to ignore it completely…At that moment, Uncle Vernon cleared his throat importantly and said, "Now, as we all know, today is a very important day."**

"They actually remembered?" Lily said.

"I doubt it," James said.

**Harry looked up, hardly daring to believe it.**

"**This could well be the day I make the biggest deal of my career," said Uncle Vernon.**

"Of course," Arthur said.

**Harry went back to his toast. Of course, he thought bitterly, Uncle Vernon was talking about the stupid dinner party. He'd been talking of nothing else for two weeks. Some rich builder and his wife were coming to dinner and Uncle Vernon was hoping to get a huge order from him (Uncle Vernon's company made drills).**

**Riley who wished him a 'Happy Birthday' as soon as they woke up, exchanged a glance with him that said 'This again'? **

"I take it he mentioned it a lot," Dakota said.

"No he didn't," Harry said.

"Hang on, I think I remember him saying something about it," Riley said "Once —"

"Or twice —"

"A minute —"

"All summer —"

"Quoting Fred and George I see," Molly said.

"**I think we should run through the schedule one more time," said Uncle Vernon. "We should all be in position at eight o'clock. Petunia, you will be —?"**

"**In the lounge," said Aunt Petunia promptly, "waiting to welcome them graciously to our home."**

"**Good, good. And Dudley?"**

"**I'll be waiting to open the door." Dudley put on a foul, simpering smile. "May I take your coats, Mr. and Mrs. Mason?"**

"**They'll love him!" cried Aunt Petunia rapturously.**

"Or hate him," Remus said.

"**Excellent, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon. Then he rounded on Harry and Riley. "And you two?"**

"**We'll be in our bedroom, making no noise and pretending we're not there," said Harry and Riley tonelessly.**

"That's a bit harsh," Hermione said.

"**Exactly," said Uncle Vernon nastily. "I will lead them into the lounge, introduce you, Petunia, and pour them drinks. At eight-fifteen —"**

"**I'll announce dinner," said Aunt Petunia.**

"**And, Dudley, you'll say —"**

"**May I take you through to the dining room, Mrs. Mason?" said Dudley, offering his fat arm to an invisible woman.**

"**My perfect little gentleman!" sniffed Aunt Petunia.**

Everyone burst out into laughter.

"**And you?" said Uncle Vernon viciously to Harry and Riley.**

"**We'll be in our room, making no noise and pretending we're not there," said Harry and Riley dully.**

"**Precisely. Now, we should aim to get in a few good compliments at dinner. Petunia, any ideas?"**

"**Vernon tells me you're a wonderful golfer, Mr. Mason… Do tell me where you bought your dress, Mrs. Mason…"**

"**Perfect… Dudley?"**

"**How about —'We had to write an essay about our hero at school, Mr. Mason, and I wrote about you.'"**

"Who writes an essay about a rich builder as a hero?" James asked.

**This was too much for Aunt Petunia, Harry, and Riley.**

**Aunt Petunia burst into tears and hugged her son, while Harry and Riley ducked under the table so they wouldn't see them laughing.**

"**And you, boy, girl?"**

**Harry and Riley fought to keep their faces straight as they emerged.**

"**We'll be in our room, making no noise and pretending we're not there," they said.**

"Well that doesn't get tiring after the third time," Thomas said.

"**Too right, you two will." said Uncle Vernon forcefully. "The Masons don't know anything about you two and it's going to stay that way. When dinner's over, you take Mrs. Mason back to the lounge for coffee, Petunia, and I'll bring the subject around to drills. With any luck, I'll have the deal signed and sealed before the news at ten. Be shopping for a vacation home in Majorca this time tomorrow."**

**Harry and Riley couldn't feel too excited about this. They didn't think the Dursleys would like them any better in Majorca than they did on Privet Drive.**

"We at least they'd be in public so they couldn't do anything to bad," Lily said.

"**Right — I'm off into town to pick up the dinner jackets for Dudley and me. And you two," he snarled at Harry and Riley. "You two stay out of Petunia's way while she's cleaning."**

**Harry and Riley left through the back door. It was a brilliant, sunny day. They crossed the lawn, slumped down on the garden bench, and Harry sang under his breath:**

"**Happy birthday to me… happy birthday to me…"**

"**Harry?" said Riley.**

"Probably thinks you've lost it," Frank said.

"**Yeah?"**

"**¡Feliz Cumpleaños a tí! ¡Feliz Cumpleaños a tí! ¡Feliz Cumpleaños Harry! ¡Feliz Cumpleaños a tí!" Riley sung.**

"Was that Spanish?" Molly asked.

"Yep, I thought Riley that on her twelfth birthday," Thomas said.

"It only took me two hours to learn it," Riley said with a proud grin.

"**Was that Spanish?" asked Harry.**

"**Yep, Thomas knows some Spanish," said Riley giving him a hug.**

**No cards, no presents, and he would be spending the evening pretending not to exist along with Riley. **

"You didn't send him anything!" James exclaimed at Thomas, Ron, and Hermione.

Three backed away quickly and said, "We did!"

**They gazed miserably into the hedge. They had never felt so lonely. More than anything else at Hogwarts, more even than playing Quidditch, Harry and Riley missed their best friends, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, and Thomas Lupin. **

**They, however, didn't seem to be missing them at all.**

"We missed you guys," Ron said.

**None of them had written to them all summer,**

"That means Thomas broke his promise," Sirius said point an accusing finger at Thomas.

"I did write to her!"

"Gee no need to shout Mini-Moony."

**even though Ron had said he was going to ask Harry and Riley to come and stay. Countless times, Harry and Riley had been on the point of unlocking Hedwig and Midnight's cages by magic and sending them to Ron, Hermione, and Riley with a letter, but it wasn't worth the risk. Underage wizards weren't allowed to use magic outside of school. **

**Harry and Riley hadn't told the Dursleys this; they knew it was only their terror that they might turn them all into dung beetles**

"I would have expected that," Remus said.

**that stopped them from locking them in the cupboard under the stairs with their wands and broomsticks.**

**For the first couple of weeks back, Harry and Riley had enjoyed muttering nonsense words under their breath and watching Dudley tearing out of the room as fast as his fat legs would carry him. But the long silence from Ron, Hermione, and Thomas had made Harry and Riley feel so cut off from the magical world that even taunting Dudley had lost its appeal —**

"That's terrible!" James said putting a hand to his heart.

**and now Ron, Hermione, and Thomas had forgotten his birthday.** **What wouldn't they give now for a message from Hogwarts? From any witch or wizard? Harry'd almost be glad of a sight of his archenemy, Draco Malfoy, just to be sure it hadn't all been a dream.**

"That's scary," Arthur said.

**Riley even told him if she could see Draco she'd hug him. **

"That's horrifying."

**Harry knew that Riley was on the point of cracking.**

"She was," Harry said.

**Not that their whole year at Hogwarts had been fun. At the very end of last term, Harry had come face-to-face with none other than Lord Voldemort himself. Voldemort might be a ruin of his former self, but he was still terrifying, still cunning, still determined to regain power. Harry had slipped through Voldemort's clutches for a second time, but it had been a narrow escape, and even now, weeks later, Harry kept waking in the night, drenched in cold sweat, wondering where Voldemort was now, remembering his livid face, his wide, mad eyes **

"That's something you can never forget," Lily said.

— **Harry and Riley suddenly sat bolt upright on the garden bench. They had been staring absent-mindedly into the hedge — and the hedge was staring back. **

**Two enormous green eyes had appeared among the leaves.**

"That's not creepy at all," Dakota said.

**Harry and Riley jumped to their feet just as a jeering voice floated across the lawn.**

"**I know what day it is," sang Dudley, waddling toward them.**

"Good for him!" Frank said clapping.

**The huge eyes blinked and vanished.**

"**What?" said Harry, not taking his eyes off the spot where they had been.**

"**I know what day it is," Dudley repeated, coming right up to them.**

"**Well done," said Harry. "So you've finally learned the days of the week."**

"**Next up the months of the year," said Riley.**

"**Today's your birthday Harry," sneered Dudley. **

"How is it that only Dudley remembered his birthday?" Alice asked.

"We've been asking that ourselves for the past seven years," Harry said.

**"How come you haven't got any cards? Haven't you even got friends at that freak place?"**

"**Better not let your mum hear you talking about our school," said Harry coolly.**

**Dudley hitched up his trousers, which were slipping down his fat bottom.**

Hermione scrunched up nose.

"**Why're you staring at the hedge?" he said suspiciously.**

"**I'm trying to decide what would be the best spell to set it on fire," said Harry.**

"**Then we'll make it come to life and attack anyone he makes us angry." said Riley.**

"Yes I can see it now The Hedge Apocalypse," Sirius said.

**Dudley stumbled backward at once, a look of panic on his fat face.**

"**You c-can't — Dad told you you're not to do m-magic — he said he'll chuck you two out of the house — and you haven't got anywhere else to go — you haven't got any friends to take you —"**

"**Jiggery pokery!" said Harry in a fierce voice. "Hocus pocus — squiggly wiggly —"**

They all grinned.

**Riley started to swish her hands around at Dudley like she was pointing a curse at him.**

"**MUUUUUUM!" howled Dudley, tripping over his feet as he dashed back toward the house. "MUUUUM! Their doing you know what!"**

Everyone had a good laugh.

**Riley collapsed on the ground in a fit of laughter.**

**Harry and Riley paid dearly for their moment of fun. As neither Dudley nor the hedge was in any way hurt, Aunt Petunia knew they hadn't really done magic, but they still had to duck as she aimed a heavy blow at their heads with the soapy frying pan.**

Molly, Lily, Dakota, and Alice's jaws dropped.

**Then she gave them work to do, with the promise they wouldn't eat again until they'd finished.** **While Dudley lolled around watching and eating ice cream, Harry and Riley cleaned the windows, washed the car, mowed the lawn, trimmed the flowerbeds, pruned and watered the roses, and repainted the garden bench. **

**The sun blazed overhead, burning the back of their neck. Harry knew they shouldn't have risen to Dudley's bait, Riley didn't regret it, but Dudley had said the very thing Harry and Riley had been thinking themself… maybe they didn't have any friends at Hogwarts…**

"YOU HAD US!" Hermione, Ron, and Thomas shouted.

"WE KNEW THAT AFTER YOU KNOW WHAT SHOWED UP!" Harry and Riley shouted back.

**Wish they could see famous Harry Potter now, he thought savagely as Harry spread manure on the flower beds, his back aching, sweat running down his face.**

**It was half past seven in the evening when at last, exhausted, they heard Aunt Petunia calling them.**

"**Get in here! And walk on the newspaper!"**

**Harry and Riley moved gladly into the shade of the gleaming kitchen. On top of the fridge stood tonight's pudding: a huge mound of whipped cream and sugared violets. A loin of roast pork was sizzling in the oven.**

"Yum, Sirius said.

"**Eat quickly! The Masons will be here soon!" snapped Aunt Petunia, pointing to four slices of bread and two lumps of cheese on the kitchen table. **

"How depressing," Remus said.

**She was already wearing a salmon-pink cocktail dress.**

"**You look lovely Petunia!" said Riley who if you didn't know well enough was lying. Riley honestly thought Petunia looked worse than usual.**

"I wonder what usual looks like…" Alice said.

**Harry and Riley washed their hands and bolted down their pitiful supper. The moment they had finished, Aunt Petunia whisked away his plate. "Upstairs! Hurry!"**

**As he passed the door to the living room, Harry caught a glimpse of Uncle Vernon and Dudley in bow ties and dinner jackets. They had only just reached the upstairs landing when the doorbell rang and Uncle Vernon's furious face appeared at the foot of the stairs.**

"**Remember, boy, girl, — one sound —"**

**Harry and Riley crossed to their bedroom on their tiptoes slipped inside, closed the door, and turned to collapse on Harry's bed. The trouble was, there was already someone sitting on it.**

"Was it Voldemort?" Sirius asked.

"I doubt it, he's half dead," Remus said handing the book to him.

Thomas handed Teddy to Remus and said, "Hold him."

Riley stared at the book and said, "I wonder what'll happen next."

"YOU WERE THERE!" everyone shouted.

_**A/N Just if you were wondering who said what at the beginning hear it is.**_

"_**Do you think they're awake?" -Ron**_

"_**Yes." -Hermione**_

"_**You do?" -Ron**_

"_**Of course not!" -Hermione**_

"_**Will you two shut up?" -Thomas**_

"_**We're pulling a Dobby!" -Riley**_

"_**Yeah, Major Déjà vu." -Harry**_

"_**Should we wake them?" -Thomas**_

"_**Not sure, it's like 8:37 in the morning, that's pretty early." -Riley**_

"_**For you!" -Thomas**_

"_**Shut up!" -Riley**_

"_**Can I have cookie now?" -Teddy**_

"_**In a minute kiddo." -Harry**_

"_**Guys! They're waking up." -Hermione**_


	2. Dobby's Warning

"**Chapter Two; Dobby's Warning,"** Sirius read.

"Who's Dobby?" Lily asked.

"You'll see," Hermione said.

"You better not go on and on about S.P.E.W." Ron warned.

**Harry and Riley managed not to shout, but it was a close thing. The little creature on the bed had large, bat like ears, and bulging green eyes the size as tennis balls.**

"That's definitely a house-elf," Sirius said. He started to think about Kreatcher then shuddered.

**Harry and Riley knew instantly that this was that thing that had been watching them out of the garden hedge this morning. As they stared at each other, Harry and Riley heard Dudley's voice from the hall.**

"**May I take your coats, Mr. and Mrs. Mason?"**

"Aw isn't he such a gentleman?" James said mocking Petunia.

**The creature slipped off the bed and bowed so low that the end of its long, thin nose touched the carpet. They noticed that it was wearing what looked like an old pillow case, with rips for arms- and leg holes.**

"You see-," Hermione began but was cutoff.

"HERMIONE," her for friends yelled.

"Fine…"

"**Er-Hello" said Harry nervously.**

**Riley stared at the creature wondering what the heck it was.**

"It's rude to stare," Dakota said to her daughter.

"**Harry Potter!" said the creature in a high-pitched voice Harry was sure would carry down the stairs "So long has Dobby wanted to meet you, sir… such an honour it is…"**

"This won't end well," Arthur groaned.

"**Th-thank-you," said Harry, edging along the wall and sinking into his shared desk chair, next to Hedwig and Midnight, who was asleep in her cage. Riley took a seat on the desk. Harry wanted to ask 'What are you?', but thought it would sound too rude, so instead he said, "Who are you?"**

"**Dobby, sir, just Dobby the house-elf," said the creature**

"**I'm Riley Black the witch," said Riley to Dobby.**

"He won't react well to that," Sirius said.

"He didn't," Riley told him.

**Dobby cowered away from her leaving Riley confused.**

"**Oh- really?" said Harry. "Er- We don't want to be rude or anything, but- this isn't a great time for us to have a house-elf in our bedroom."**

**Aunt Petunia's high, false laugh sounded from the living room. **

"It sounded likes two owls fighting, or as Riley would put it, Thomas singing," Harry said.

Thomas rolled his eyes.

**The elf hung his head.**

"**Not that we're pleased to meet you," said Harry quickly, "But, err, is there any particular reason you're here?"**

"**Oh, yes, sir," said Dobby earnestly. "Dobby has come to tell you, sir… it is difficult, sir… Dobby wonders where to begin…"**

"At the beginning," Frank suggested.

"**Sit down," said Harry politely, pointing at the bed.**

"Oh no…" Dakota said.

**To his horror, the elf burst into tears-very noisy tears.**

"**S-sit down!" he wailed "Never…Never ever…"**

**Harry and Riley thought they heard the voices down stairs falter.**

"I wonder what everyone who was down stairs thought what was going on upstairs," Remus wondered aloud.

"**I'm sorry," he whispered, "I didn't mean to offend you or anything-"**

"**Offend Dobby!" chocked the elf. "Dobby has never been asked to sit down by a wizard- like an equal-"**

**Harry, trying to say "Shh!" and look comforting at the same time, ushered Dobby onto the bed where he sat hiccoughing, looking like a large and very ugly doll. At last he managed to control himself, and sat with him great eyes fixed on Harry in an expression of watery adoration.**

"Dobby always liked you best, Harry," Thomas said.

Harry gave him a weak grin. It was always hard for the five to talk about Dobby.

"**You can't have met many decent wizards," said Harry, trying to cheer him up**

**Dobby shook his head, then without warning, he leapt up and started banging his head furiously on the window shouting, "Bad Dobby! Bad Dobby!" **

"I hate how they always need to punish themselves," Lily said.

**Riley groaned thinking this wouldn't go good. Maybe she should start talking to Dobby instead.**

"Yeah because you're the nicest person in the world," Ron said sarcastically.

"You could say the same thing, _Won-Won,_" Riley retorted.

Ron went pink and Riley gave a satisfied smirk.

"**Don't-What are you doing?" Harry hissed, springing up and pulling him back onto the bed- Hedwig and Midnight had woken up with a particular loud screech and was beating their wings wildly against the bars of their cages. Riley quickly went to quiet the owls.**

"**Dobby had to punish himself, sir," said the elf, who had gone slightly cross-eyed. "Dobby almost spoke ill of his family, sir…"**

"Well I hate his family," Hermione huffed.

"**Your family?"**

"**The wizard family Dobby serves, sir…Dobby is a house elf-bound to serve one house and family forever…"**

"At my house once a house-elf has died its head is mounted," Sirius said.

Everyone shuddered a bit.

"**Do they know you're here?" asked Harry curiously **

**Dobby shuddered.**

"I take that as a no," Molly said.

"**Oh, no, sir, no…Dobby will have to punish himself most grievously for coming to see you, sir. Dobby will have to shut his ears in the oven for this.**

"He'll burn himself!" Alice exclaimed.

**If they ever knew, sir-"**

"**But won't they notice if you shut your ears in the oven door?"**

"I doubt it," Arthur said having a feeling he knew who his family was.

"**Dobby doubts it, sir. Dobby is always having to punish himself for something, sir. They lets Dobby get on with it, sir. Sometimes they reminds me to do extra punishments …"**

"Extra?" Lily shouted.

"**But why don't you leave? Escape?"**

"**A house-elf must be set free, sir. And the family will never set Dobby free… Dobby will serve the family until he dies, sir…"**

"**That's some pretty dark stuff, Dobby," said Riley.**

"Agreed," Dakota agreed.

**Harry stared.**

"**And we thought we had it bad staying here for another four weeks," He said. "This makes the Dursleys sound almost human."**

"**They'll never be human they're to abnormal,"**

"Ha! Reference to the first chapter," James said.

**said Riley. Harry shushed her.**

**Can't anyone help you? Can't I?" Almost at once, Harry wished he hadn't spoken. Dobby dissolved into wails of gratitude.**

"**Please," Harry whispered frantically, "please be quiet. If the Dursleys hear anything, if they knew you were here-"**

"They would gut you like a fish," Remus said.

"**Harry Potter asks if he can help Dobby… Dobby has heard of your greatness, sir, but of your goodness, Dobby never knew…"**

**Harry who was feeling hot in the face, said, "Whatever you heard about my greatness is a load of rubbish**. **I'm not even top of my year at Hogwarts; that's Hermione she-"**

**But he stopped quickly, because thinking of Hermione was painful.**

"I'm sorry I caused you pain," Hermione joked.

"It's fine it's not me you should worry about," Harry replied.

**He then saw Riley burst into tears, she had finally cracked.**

The room went silent and everyone looked at Riley. Thomas put an arm around Riley's waist. Riley stared at the floor.

"You can cry?" James and Ron asked in unison.

"JAMES!" Lily scolded.

"RONALD!" Molly scolded.

"It's fine," Riley said, "It's was just hard to get through that summer without hearing from my friends. Especially when I thought Thomas broke his promise. I thought I had lost my best friends and they were all I had because my grades always stank."

"**Harry Potter is humble and modest," said Dobby reverently, his orb-like eyes aglow. "Harry Potter speaks not of his triumph over He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-"**

"**Voldemort?" said Harry.**

Ron pretended to cringe.

**Dobby clapped his hands over his bat ears and moaned, "Ah, speak not the name, sir! Speak not the name!"**

"Just like what Ron does, or used to possibly," Frank said.

"**Sorry," said Harry quickly. "I know lots of people who don't like it. My friend Ron-"**

**Dobby leaned toward Harry, his eyes wide as headlights.**

"What are headlights," Alice asked.

"They are lights on cars Muggles use," Lily explained.

"**Dobby heard Master tell," he said hoarsely, "that Harry Potter met the Dark Lord for a second time just weeks ago… that Harry Potter escaped yet again."**

"Won't be that last time," Thomas mumbled.

Molly looked at him and asked, "What?"

"Nothing!"

**Harry nodded and Dobby eyes suddenly shone with tears.**

"**Ah, sir," he gasped, dabbing his face with a corner of the grubby pillowcase he was wearing. "Harry Potter is valiant and bold! **

"Just like his mother," Sirius said.

"What about his father?"

"I'm going to be frank with you, James, your freakin' teddy bear."

Everyone minus James laughed.

**He has braved so many dangers already! But Dobby has come to protect Harry Potter, to warn him, even if he does have to shut his ears in the oven door later… Harry Potter and his friend must not go back to Hogwarts."**

"WHAT?" everyone shouted except for a certain five.

**There was a silence broken only by the clink of knives and forks from downstairs and the distant rumble of Uncle Vernon's voice.**

"Did it sound like thunder, Harry?" Arthur asked.

"Yes."

**Riley wiped her eyes and stared at the house-elf. Her mind processed what he had said and she burst into tears again.**

"**W-what?" Harry stammered. "But we've got to go back- term starts on September first. It's all that's keeping us going. You don't know what it's like here. We don't belong here. We belong in your world-at Hogwarts."**

"You're darn right!" Frank exclaimed.

"**No, no, no," squeaked Dobby, shaking his head so hard his ears flapped. "Harry Potter must stay were he's safe. He is too great, too good, to lose. If Harry Potter goes back to Hogwarts, he will be in mortal danger."**

"Not again," Lily groaned.

"**Why?" said Harry in surprise.**

"**There is a plot, Harry Potter. A plot to make most terrible things happen at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry this year,"**

Hermione shuddered. Thomas and Riley exchanged glances.

**whispered Dobby, suddenly trembling all over. "Dobby has known it for months, sir. Harry potter must not put himself into peril. He is too important, sir!"**

"I'm important too," Riley whined.

"Would you like some cheese with that whine?" Remus asked.

"That was the worst joke I ever heard- scratch that the worst joke I've ever heard was Vernon's Japanese golfer joke."

"**What terrible things?" said Harry at once "Who's plotting them?"**

**Dobby made a funny choking noise and then banged his head frantically against the wall.**

"**It's obvious isn't it, Harry?" said Riley**

"Voldemort?" Dakota guessed.

"**All right!' cried Harry, grabbing the elf's arm to stop him. "You can't tell me. I understand. But why are you warning me?" A sudden, unpleasant thought struck him. "Hang on- this hasn't got anything to do with Vol- sorry- with You Know Who, has it? You could just shake or nod," he added hastily as Dobby's head tilted worryingly close to the wall again.**

**Slowly, Dobby shook his head.**

Everyone looked relieved.

"**Not- not He-who-Must-Not Be-Named, sir-**"

**But Dobby's eyes grew wide and he seemed to be trying to give Harry a hint. Harry, however, was completely lost.**

"**He hasn't got a brother has he?"**

"Harry!" Lily exclaimed.

"I was twelve!"

**Riley snorted, but it sounded like a sniffle.**

**Dobby shook his head, his eyes wider than ever.**

"**Well then, I can't think who else would have a chance of making horrible things happen at Hogwarts,"**

"Malfoy?" James guessed.

"Ooh I know! Snivellus!" Sirius said.

"Or their new DADA professor," Remus said.

**said Harry. "I mean- there's Dumbledore for one thing, you know who Dumbledore is, don't you?"**

**Dobby bowed his head. **

"**Albus Dumbledore is the greatest headmaster Hogwarts has ever had."**

"Speaking of Dumbledore how is he?" Molly asked.

The room went silent.

"Umm… Alive," Hermione lied.

"Still eating those Lemon drops," Thomas lied also.

Harry, Ron, and Riley nodded in unison.

"**Dobby know it, sir. Dobby has heard Dumbledore's power's rival those of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named at the height of his strength. But, sir." –Dobby's voice dropped to an urgent whisper, "There are powers Dumbledore doesn't have… powers no decent wizard…"**

"LIES!" Alice cried, "LIES I TELL YOU!"

**And before Harry could stop him, Dobby bounded off the bed, seized Harry and Riley's desk lamp, and started beating himself around the head with ear-splitting yelps. Riley grabbed the lamp away from him and held Dobby by the pillow case.**

**A sudden silence fell downstairs. Two seconds later, Harry and Riley's, hearts thudding madly, heard Uncle Vernon coming into the hall calling, "Dudley must have left his television on again, the little tyke!" **

"Oh I hope they don't get in trouble," Dakota said.

"**Quick! In the closet!" hissed Harry, stuffing Dobby in, shutting the door, and flinging himself followed by Riley onto Harry's bed just as the door handle turned.**

"**What- the- devil- are- you two doing?" said Uncle Vernon through gritted teeth, his face horribly close to Harry and Riley's. "You just ruined the punch line of my Japanese golfer joke**

"I'm being frank when I say this, the joke is not funny."

…**one more sound and you two'll wish you'd never been born, boy, girl!"**

**He stomped flat footed from the room.**

**Shaking, Harry let Dobby out of the closet.**

"**See what it's like here?" he said "See why we've got to go back to Hogwarts? It's the only place where we got- well I think we've got friends."**

"It's true," Harry said. Riley nodded.

"**Friends who don't even write to Harry Potter and his friend?" said Dobby shyly.**

"He didn't!" Arthur exclaimed.

"He couldn't have!" Frank exclaimed.

**Riley looked suspiciously at Dobby.**

"**I expect they've just been- wait a minute," said Harry frowning. "How do you know our friends haven't been writing to us?"**

"GUILTY!" James shouted.

"BUSTED!" Sirius shouted.

"Will you two shut up?"

"Sorry Moony…"

**Dobby shuffled his feet.**

"**Harry Potter and his friend **

"Why does he keep calling you 'his friend'?" Remus asked.

**mustn't be angry with Dobby. Dobby did it for the best-"**

"How is it for the best?" Molly asked.

"**Have you been stopping our letters?" asked Riley**

"**Dobby has them here, sir, miss." said the elf. Stepping nimbly out of Harry's reach, he pulled out two thick wads of envelopes from the inside of the pillow case he was wearing.**

**Harry and Riley could make out Hermione's neat handwriting, Ron's untidy scrawl, Thomas's perfect printing, and even a scribble as though it was from the Hogwarts game keeper, Hagrid.**

"Well at least they wrote, and Hagrid," Lily said.

**Dobby blinked anxiously up at Harry and Riley.**

"**Harry Potter and his friend mustn't be angry… Dobby hoped… if Harry Potter and friend thought their friends had forgotten them… Harry Potter and friend might not want to go back to school, sir, miss."**

"That would ever work," Remus said.

"Besides you can always make new friends

**Harry and Riley weren't listening. They made a grab for the letters, but Dobby jumped out of reach.**

"**Harry Potter and his friend will have them, sir, miss, if they gives Dobby their word that they will not return to Hogwarts. Ah, Harry Potter, this is a danger you must not face! Say you won't go back, sir, miss!"**

"What is Dobby's deal anyway?" Frank asked.

"Looking back his heart was in the right place," Riley said.

"**No," said Harry angrily. "Give us our friends' letters!"**

"**They're ours," protested Riley.**

"Isn't it illegal or something to take someone's mail?" Lily asked.

"Dunno," Ron answered.

"**Then Harry Potter and friend leaves Dobby no choice," said the elf sadly**

**Before Harry and Riley could move, Dobby had darted to the bedroom door,**

Everyone groaned.

**pulled it open, and sprinted down the stairs.** **Mouth dry, stomach lurching, Harry and Riley sprang after him, trying not to make a sound. They jumped the last six steps, landing cat like on the hall carpet, looking around for Dobby. From the dining room he heard Uncle Vernon saying, "…tell Petunia about that very funny story about the American plumbers**

"What's a plumber," Alice asked.

"A man or women Muggle that take care of a Muggle's plumbing as in water pipes and such." Hermione told her.

**, Mr. Mason, she's been dying to hear…"**

**Harry and Riley ran up the hall into the kitchen and felt their stomachs disappear.**

**Aunt Petunia's master piece of a pudding, the mountain of cream and sugar violets, was floating up near the ceiling.**

"Don't do it Dobs!" Sirius cried dramatically.

"Sirius you have the book you know what's going to happen," Dakota pointed out.

"I don't read ahead like _some people_…"

**On top of a cupboard in the corner crouched Dobby.**

"**No" croaked Harry, "Please, they'll kill us."**

"**It'll be a slow and painful death," whispered Riley.**

"**Harry Potter and his friend must say he's not going back to school."**

"I can't watch- er listen," Molly said.

"**Dobby… please…"**

"**Say it, sir-"**

"**I can't-"**

**Dobby gave him a tragic look.**

"**Then Dobby must do it, sir, for Harry Potter own good."**

**The pudding fell to the floor with a heart stopping crash.**

Harry and Riley's hearts stopped for a brief second. Then they remembered they were only listening to what happened to them.

**Cream splattered the windows and walls as the dish shattered. With a crack like a whip, Dobby vanished.**

**There were screams from the dining room and Uncle Vernon burst into the kitchen to find Harry and Riley, rigid with shock, covered head to foot with Aunt Petunia's pudding.**

"On the bright side the pudding was delicious!" Riley said.

**At first, it looked as though Uncle Vernon would manage to gloss things over. ("Just our nephew and er niece**

"I AM NOT HIS NIECE!"

**- very disturbed- meeting strangers upsets them, so we kept them upstairs…") He shooed the shocked Masons back into the dining room, promised Harry and Riley he would flay them to within an inch of their life when the Masons had left and handed them mops. Aunt Petunia dug some ice cream out of the freezer and Harry and Riley, still shaking with fear, started scrubbing the kitchen clean.** **Uncle Vernon still might have been able to make his deal – if it hadn't been for the owl.**

Everyone groaned. They knew this would not end well at all.

**Aunt Petunia was just passing around a box of after-dinner mints when a huge barn owl swooped through the dining room window, dropped a two letters on Mrs. Mason's head, and swooped out again. Mrs. Mason screamed liked a banshee and ran from the house shouting about lunatics. Mr. Mason stayed just long enough to tell the Dursleys that his wife was mortally afraid of birds of all shapes and sizes, and ask whether this was their idea of a joke.**

**Harry and Riley stood in the kitchen, clutching the mop for support, as Uncle Vernon advanced on them, a demonic glint in his tiny eyes.**

"**Read it!" he hissed evilly, brandishing the letters the owl had delivered. "Go on – read it!"**

**Harry and Riley took them. It did not contain birthday greetings for Harry.**

"Did you two actually think they would be birthday greetings for Harry?" Molly asked.

Harry and Riley looked sheepishly at the ground and mumbled.

_**Dear Mr. Potter,**_

_**We have received intelligence that a hover charm was used at your place of residence this evening at twelve minutes past nine.**_

"But they didn't use the hover charm," Remus said.

_**As you know, underage wizards are not permitted to preform spells outside of school, and further spell work on your part may lead to expulsion from said school (Decree for Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery, 1875, paragraph C).**_

_**We would also ask you to remember that any magical activity that risks notice by members of the non-magical community (Muggles) is a serious offence under section 13 of the International Confederation of Warlocks' Statute of Secrecy.**_

_**Enjoy you holiday's!**_

"What the heck?" Frank said.

_**Yours sincerely,**_

_**Mafalda Hopkirk**_

_**IMPROPER USE OF MAGIC OFFICE **_

_**Ministry of Magic**_

**Riley's letter said the same thing but started with, Dear Miss. Black.**

**Harry looked up from the letter a gulped. Riley's face went from pink to a sickening pale colour.**

"What colour would that be?" Ron asked.

"A light grey, right Riley?" Harry said.

"Well Harry I wouldn't know there were no mirrors." Riley said.

"**You two didn't tell us you weren't allowed to use magic outside of school," said Uncle Vernon, a mad gleam dancing in his eyes. "Forgot to mention it… sipped your minds, I dare say…"He was bearing down on Harry and Riley like a great bulldog, all his teeth bared. "Well, I've got news for you boy, girl… I'm locking you two up**… **You're never going back to that school… never… and if you try to magic yourself out – they'll expel you!"**

"THEY'RE GONNA DIE!" Sirius yelled.

Harry and Riley stared at him.

"Oh right…"

**And laughing like a maniac, he dragged Harry and Riley back upstairs.** **Uncle Vernon was as bad as his words. The following morning, he paid a man to fit bars on his windows.**

"THEY AREN'T PRISONERS!" Molly and Lily exclaimed.

**He himself fitted a cat-flap in the bedroom door,** **so that small amounts could be pushed inside three times a day. They let Harry and Riley out to use the bathroom morning and evening. Otherwise, they were locked in their room around the clock.**

**Three days later, the Dursleys were showing no sign of relenting, and Harry and Riley couldn't see any way out of this situation.**

"But there always is a solution…" James complained.

**They lay on their beds watching the sun sinking behind the bars on the window and wondered miserably what was going to happen to them.**

**What was the good of a magicking themself out of his room if Hogwarts was going to expel them for doing it? **

"They're being held hostage," Dakota said, "I think that's a good enough excuse."

**Yet life at Privet drive left an all-time low**. **Now that the Dursleys knew they weren't going to wake as fruit bats, they had lost their only weapon. Dobby might have saved them from horrible happenings at Hogwarts, but the way things were going, Harry'd probably starve to death anyway. **

"He has always has been on the boney side," Thomas said.

Harry rolled his eyes.

**He was pretty sure Riley would get dehydrated within a few days. Every night she'd fall asleep crying and Harry new why. The only thing she had looked forward to was seeing Hermione, Ron, and Thomas. That's all she had.**

"And me!" Harry said.

"I know Harry, you're my brother," Riley said giving Harry a hug.

**The cat-flap rattled and Aunt Petunia's hand appeared pushing two bowls of canned soup into the room. Harry and Riley, whose insides were aching with hunger, jumped off their beds and seized them. The soup was stone-cold, **

"I'm going to murder Tuney…" Lily said her teeth clenched.

**but they drank half of it in one gulp.**

**Then they crossed the room to Hedwig's and Midnight's cage and tipped the soggy vegetables at the bottom of the bowls into their empty food trays.**

"They can't even properly feed their owls," Remus said full of anger.

**They ruffled her feathers and gave him a look of deep disgust.**

"**It's no good turning your beak up at it – that's all we got," said Harry grimly.**

"**I wish she had given us saltine crackers instead of this yuck," said Riley motioning at the soggy vegetables, "At least our owls would eat them."**

"But crackers are salty and we don't know if they have any water," Alice said.

**They put the empty bowls back on the floor next to the cat-flap and lay back down on the beds, somehow even hungrier than they had been before the soup.**

"The fact they aren't getting enough nutrition and they probably have their fathers' appetites make sense." Lily said.

**Supposing they were still alive in another four weeks, what would happen if they didn't turn up at Hogwarts? Would someone be sent to see why they hadn't come back? **

"It would be suspicious if 'The Boy Who Lived' didn't show up at Hogwarts," James pointed out.

**Would they be able to the Dursleys let him go?** **The room was growing dark. Exhausted, stomach rumbling, mind spinning over the same unanswerable questions, Harry and Riley fell into an uneasy sleep.**

"Dream time!" Sirius exclaimed.

"I'm sorry dad," Riley said.

"For what?"

"My dream,"

**Riley had dreamed she was in a real jail. There were floating figures floating around the halls.**

"Dementors…" Arthur whispered.

**She could hear screams of innocence and maniacal laughter. Worse of all was when she turned around and saw her cellmate. Mass murderer and her father Sirius Black was here cellmate. It had gotten worse when he started telling her when he was disappointed to be her father. **

"But shouldn't Riley be telling Sirius-," Frank started. Sirius hushed and began to read.

**Riley shot back and said she was humiliated to be his daughter. **

"There it is."

**No one wanted family to say thing like that to each other.**

"Amen," Molly agreed.

**He dreamed that he was on show in a zoo, with a card reading UNDERAGE WIZARD attached to his cage. **

"Well isn't that an odd dream," Arthur said.

**People goggled through the bars at him as he lay, starving and weak, on a bed of straw. **

"And now we have learned what zoo animals feel like," Hermione said.

**He saw Dobby's face in the crowd and shouted out for help, but Dobby called, "Harry Potter is safe there, sir!" and vanished. Then the Dursleys appeared and Dudley rattled the bars of the cage, laughing at him.**

"Why am I not surprised?" Lily said.

"**Stop it," muttered Harry as the rattling pounded in his sore head. "Leave me alone… cut it out… I'm trying to sleep…"**

"**Keep talkin' Harry", mumbled Riley wide awake staring at the ceiling," I'm much too scared to fall asleep… and I've probably been scarred for life**

"Dreams can do that to you…" Thomas said.

… **I'm hungry…"**

**Harry opened his eyes. Moonlight was shining through the bars of the window. And someone was goggling through the bars of the window at them: a freckled face, red-haired, long-nosed someone.**

Everyone grinned.

Sirius looked at the book and pretended to read the line word for word, "Percy Weasley was outside Harry and Riley's window."

Riley, Harry, and Ron glared at him. Everyone looked confused. Why would Percy be saving them? They wondered.

"I'm kidding guys," Sirius said and he read the last sentence.

**Ron Weasley was outside Harry and Riley's window.**

Lily and Dakota beamed at Ron.

"But how did Ron get to their window?" Sirius asked handing the book to Arthur.

"Well we are about to find out," Arthur said.


	3. The Burrow

_Chapter three! I aslo don't own Harry Potter!_

"**Chapter Three; The Burrow,"** read Arthur, "Would that be our house?"

Ron nodded.

"The greatest place on earth!" said Riley, "Though it is tied with Hogwarts, Disney World, and- OW HERMS!"

Hermione had slapped the back of her head.

"**Ron!" breathed Harry, creeping to the window and pushing it up so they could talk through the bars. "Ron, how did you —? What the** —?"

Lily snorted.

**Riley face lit up and she whispered, "Yes! Ron get us out of this prison!"**

**Harry's mouth fell open as the full impact of what he was seeing hit him. Ron was leaning out of the back window of an old turquoise car,**

Molly instantly shot Arthur a death glare.

"Arthur…" Molly growled.

"How did you know if I did anything?" said Arthur.

The future generation burst into laughter.

**which was parked in midair. Grinning at Harry and Riley from the front seats were Fred and George, Ron's elder twin brothers.**

"Of course," Molly groaned.

"**All right, Harry, Riley?" asked George.**

"**No we aren't," answered Riley.**

"Of course you aren't," Dakota said.

"**What's been going on?" said Ron. "Why haven't you two been answering my letters? I've asked you guys to stay about twelve times, and then Dad came home and said you'd got an official warning for using magic in front of Muggles —"**

"It wasn't them," Remus said.

"I know," Ron said.

"**It wasn't us — and how did he know?" asked Harry**

"**He works for the Ministry," said Ron. "You know we're not supposed to do spells outside school —"**

Everyone looked at Ron.

"He's very slow when it comes to catching onto things," Hermione said.

"**You should talk," said Harry, staring at the floating car. Riley smirked.**

"**Oh, this doesn't count," said Ron. "We're only borrowing this. It's Dad's, we didn't enchant it. But doing magic in front of those Muggles you live with —"**

No one bothered to say anything.

"**I told you, I didn't — but it'll take too long to explain now — look, can you tell them at Hogwarts that the Dursleys have locked me up and won't let me come back, and obviously I can't magic myself out, because the Ministry'll think that's the second spell I've done in three days, so —"**

"**Stop gibbering," said Ron. "We've come to take you two home with us."**

"How?" Frank asked.

"**But you can't magic us out either —"**

"**We don't need to," said Ron, jerking his head toward the front seat and grinning. "You forget who I've got with me."**

"**Yeah Harry," agreed Riley. "He's got The Double Trouble Twins!"**

"The Double Trouble Twins?" Alice asked.

"I think it's clever," Sirius said high-fiving his daughter.

"**Tie that around the bars," said Fred, throwing the end of a rope to Harry.**

"**If the Dursleys wake up, we are dead," said Harry as he tied the rope tightly around a bar and Fred revved up the car.**

"**Don't worry," said Fred, "and stand back."**

"I've learned the hard way that when Fred or George say stand back you should stand back." said Thomas, "My eyebrows had to learn the hard way."

**Harry and Riley moved back into the shadows next to Hedwig and Midnight, who seemed to have realized how important this was and kept still and silent. The car revved louder and louder and suddenly, with a crunching noise, the bars were pulled clean out of the window as Fred drove straight up in the air. Harry and Riley ran back to the window to see the bars dangling a few feet above the ground. Panting, Ron hoisted them up into the car.**

"How come you guys have no upper body strength?" James asked.

**Harry and Riley listened anxiously, but there was no sound from the Dursleys' bedroom.**

**When the bars were safely in the back seat with Ron, Fred reversed as close as possible to Harry and Riley's window.**

"How does he know how to drive?" Molly asked.

Ron, Harry, and Riley shrugged. A pang of grief hit them. They missed Fred terribly.

"**Get in," Ron said.**

"**But all our Hogwarts stuff — our wands — our broomsticks —"**

"**Where is it?"**

"**Locked in the cupboard under the stairs, and we can't get out of this room —"**

"**No problem," said George from the front passenger seat. "Out of the way, guys."**

**Fred and George climbed catlike through the window into Harry and Riley's room. You had to hand it to them, thought Harry, as George took an ordinary hairpin from his pocket and started to pick the lock.**

"Why does George have a hair pin?" Remus asked.

"**I'm a bit concerned about why Georgie has a hair pin," Riley said.**

"Me too," said Arthur.

"**A lot of wizards think it's a waste of time, knowing this sort of Muggle trick," said Fred, "but we feel they're skills worth learning, even if they are a bit slow."**

"**You'll have to teach me this trick."**

"**Oh we will."**

"And they did," said Riley grinning like a five year old.

**There was a small click and the door swung open.**

"**So — we'll get your trunks — you grab anything you need from your room and hand it out to Ron," whispered George.**

"**Watch out for the bottom stair — it creaks," Riley whispered back as the twins disappeared onto the dark landing. "I've done my share of sneaking around for a midnight snack."**

"Snack time?" asked Teddy.

"No, sorry," said Hermione patting Teddy's head.

Teddy frowned.

**Harry and Riley dashed around their room, collecting their things and passing them out of the window to Ron. Then they went to help Fred and George heave their trunks up the stairs. They heard Uncle Vernon cough.**

**At last, panting, they reached the landing, then carried the trunks through Harry and Riley's room to the open window. Fred climbed back into the car to pull with Ron, and Harry, Riley, and George pushed from the bedroom side. Inch by inch, the trunks slid through the window.**

"How in the world are getting the trunk out the window?" Lily asked.

**Uncle Vernon coughed again.**

"**A bit more," panted Fred, who was pulling from inside the car. "One good push"**

**Harry, Riley, and George threw their shoulders against the last trunk and it slid out of the window into the back seat of the car.**

"How many Gryffindors does it take to get a trunk through a window?" Sirius asked.

"Five, the answer is five," James answered.

"Correct!"

"**Okay, let's go," George whispered.**

"I think you guys forgot the owls," Thomas said.

**Riley climbed out the windowsill and into the car, but as Harry climbed onto the windowsill there came a sudden loud screeches from behind him, **

"YOU BLOODY FORGOT THE OWLS?" Dakota shout.

"That's what I said!" Thomas exclaimed.

**followed immediately by the thunder of Uncle Vernon's voice.**

"**THOSE RUDDY OWLS!"**

"**We've forgotten Hedwig and Midnight!" said Harry**

"Yes we've already discussed that," Frank said.

**Harry tore back across the room as the landing light clicked on — he snatched up Hedwig and Midnight's cages, dashed to the window, and passed them out to Ron and Riley. He was scrambling back onto the chest of drawers when Uncle Vernon hammered on the unlocked door — and it crashed open.**

**For a split second, Uncle Vernon stood framed in the doorway; then he let out a bellow like an angry bull and dived at Harry, grabbing him by the ankle.**

"LET GO OF HIM YOU COW!" almost everyone yelled.

**Ron, Riley, Fred, and George seized Harry's arms and pulled as hard as they could.**

"**Petunia!" roared Uncle Vernon. "He's getting away! HE'S GETTING AWAY!"**

"That won't attract attention from the neighbors," said Alice.

**But the Weasleys and Riley gave a gigantic tug and Harry's leg slid out of Uncle Vernon's grasp — Harry was in the car — he'd slammed the door shut —**

"**Put your foot down, Fred!" yelled Ron, and the car shot suddenly toward the moon.**

**Harry and Riley couldn't believe it — they were free.**

"You're FREEEEEE!" Sirius shouted.

**Harry rolled down the window, the night air whipping his hair, and looked back at the shrinking rooftops of Privet Drive. Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia, and Dudley were all hanging, dumbstruck, out of Harry and Riley's window.**

"**See you next summer!" Harry yelled.**

"**We won't miss you!" Riley shouted.**

"And we didn't," Harry said.

**The Weasleys roared with laughter and Harry and Riley settled back in their seats, grinning from ear to ear.**

"**Let Hedwig and Midnight out," he told Ron. "They can fly behind us. They haven't had a chance to stretch their wings for ages."**

"Poor things," Molly cooed.

**George handed the hairpin to Ron and, a moment later, Hedwig and Midnight soared joyfully out of the window to glide alongside them like a ghost.**

"**So — what's the story, Harry, Riley?" said Ron impatiently. "What's been happening?"**

**Harry told them all about Dobby, the warning he'd given Harry and the fiasco of the violet pudding. There was a long, shocked silence when he had finished.**

"**Very fishy," said Fred finally.**

"It was," said Riley, "I mean if a house elf was in your room and was telling you, you were in mortal danger it would be fishy."

"I'm glad it was the first and last time that," Harry said.

"**Definitely dodgy," agreed George. "So he wouldn't even tell you two who's supposed to be plotting all this stuff?"**

"**I don't think he could," said Harry. "I told you, every time he got close to letting something slip, he started banging his head against the wall."**

**He saw Fred and George look at each other.**

"What does that mean?" Remus asked.

"I hate how they use to know what one another is thinking most of the time," said Ron.

"**What, you think he was lying to us?" said Harry.**

"**Well," said Fred, "put it this way — house-elves have got powerful magic of their own, but they can't usually use it without their master's permission. I reckon old Dobby was sent to stop you coming back to Hogwarts. Someone's idea of a joke. Can you think of anyone at school with a grudge against you?"**

"Yes Malfoy, Snape – " Sirius said but was cut off by Harry.

"Don't worry Riley list 'em."

"**Yes," said Harry, Ron, and Riley together, instantly.**

"**Quite a few people for me actually," said Riley, "Snape, Crabbe, Goyle, Pug-Face, most Slytherins, three Hufflepuffs, and eight Ravenclaws.**

"That's a lot of enemies," Dakota said, "I'm not even going to ask about the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws."

**Now who am I missing?"**

"Malfoy…" Arthur answered.

"**Draco Malfoy," Harry added. "He hates us."**

"**Draco Malfoy?" said George, turning around. "Not Lucius Malfoy's son?"**

"And your sworn enemy dad," said Ron.

"**Must be, it's not a very common name, is it?" said Harry.**

**Riley shuddered at the thought of more Dracos.**

A few others shuddered.

"**I've heard Dad talking about him," said George. "He was a big supporter of You-Know-Who."**

"**And when You-Know-Who disappeared," said Fred, craning around to look at Harry, "Lucius Malfoy came back saying he'd never meant any of it. Load of dung — Dad reckons he was right in You- Know-Who's inner circle."**

Riley, Ron, and Harry shared a look. They, Thomas, and Hermione all knew that Lucius Malfoy's was in fact part of Voldy's inner circle. All of them were happy to know he was in still in Azkaban as the read. Though they did feel a tiny bit bad for Mrs. Malfoy who now didn't really have a husband. No one would be surprised if they got divorced. But Riley couldn't stand the fact she was related to people like Lucius Malfoy. She was glad that some of them changed. After the war she and Draco along with Harry agreed to forgive and forget.

**Harry and Riley had heard these rumors about Malfoy's family before, and they didn't surprise them at all. Malfoy made Dudley Dursley look like a kind, thoughtful, and sensitive boy…**

James snorted.

"**I don't know whether the Malfoys own a house-elf…" said Harry.**

"**Well, whoever owns him will be an old wizarding family, and they'll be rich," said Fred.**

"**Yeah, Mum's always wishing we had a house-elf to do the ironing," said George. **"**But all we've got is a lousy old ghoul in the attic and gnomes all over the garden. House-elves come with big old manors and castles and places like that; you wouldn't catch one in our house…"**

"He says it like a bad thing," Lily said.

"We didn't really have much money," Ron said hesitantly.

**Harry and Riley were silent. Judging by the fact that Draco Malfoy usually had the best of everything, his family was rolling in wizard gold; they could just see Malfoy strutting around a large manor house. Sending the family servant to stop Harry and Riley from going back to Hogwarts also sounded exactly like the sort of thing Malfoy would do. Had Harry and Riley been stupid to take Dobby seriously?**

"**I'm glad we came to get you, anyway," said Ron. "I was getting really worried when you didn't answer any of my letters. I thought it was Errol's fault at first —"**

"Who's Errol?" Frank asked.

"**Who's Errol?"**

Frank blinked and there was scattered laughter through the room.

"**Our owl. He's ancient.**

"He's dead," Thomas said.

"Errol was a good owl, a very nice one in fact," Harry said.

"R.I.P, Errol," Riley said bowing her head.

**It wouldn't be the first time he'd collapsed on a delivery. So then I tried to borrow Hermes —"**

"**Who?"**

"**The owl Mum and Dad bought Percy when he was made prefect," said Fred from the front.**

"**But Percy wouldn't lend him to me," said Ron. "Said he needed him."**

"For what?" Molly asked.

"You'll find out at the end of the book," Hermione said.

"**Percy's been acting very oddly this summer," said George, frowning. "And he has been sending a lot of letters and spending a load of time shut up in his room… I mean, there's only so many times you can polish a prefect badge**

Ron snorted. Even when he was a prefect he barely ever polished it more than once a day.

… **You're driving too far west, Fred," he added, pointing at a compass on the dashboard. Fred twiddled the steering wheel.**

"**So, does your dad know you've got the car?" said Harry, guessing the answer.**

"I take the answer will be no," Arthur said.

"**Er, no," said Ron, "he had to work tonight. Hopefully we'll be able to get it back in the garage without Mum noticing we flew it."**

"**What does your dad do at the Ministry of Magic, anyway?"**

"**He works in the most boring department," said Ron. "The Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office."**

"IT'S NOT BORING!"

"It kind of is dad."

"**The what?" asked Riley.**

"**It's all to do with bewitching things that are Muggle-made, you know, in case they end up back in a Muggle shop or house. Like, last year, some old witch died and her tea set was sold to an antiques shop. This Muggle woman bought it, took it home, and tried to serve her friends tea in it. It was a nightmare — Dad was working overtime for weeks."**

"I wonder what happened," Dakota said.

"**What happened?"**

"**The teapot went berserk and squirted boiling tea all over the place and one man ended up in the hospital with the sugar tongs clamped to his nose. **

"Oh… Ouch."

**Dad was going frantic — it's only him and an old warlock called Perkins in the office — and they had to do Memory Charms and all sorts of stuff to cover it up —"**

"**But your dad — this car —" said Harry.**

"Yes the car," Molly said glaring at Arthur.

**Fred laughed. "Yeah, Dad's crazy about everything to do with Muggles; our shed's full of Muggle stuff. He takes it apart, puts spells on it, and puts it back together again. If he raided our house he'd have to put himself under arrest.**

"That's not crazy at all Arthur," Sirius said.

"Thanks," Arthur said sarcastically.

**It drives Mum mad."**

"**That's the main road," said George, peering down through the windshield. "We'll be there in ten minutes… Just as well, it's getting light…"**

**A faint pinkish glow was visible along the horizon to the east.**

"That sounds beautiful!" Alice said.

**Fred brought the car lower, and Harry and Riley saw a dark patchwork of fields and clumps of trees.**

"**We're a little way outside the village," said George. "Ottery St. Catchpole."**

**Lower and lower went the flying car. The edge of a brilliant red sun was now gleaming through the trees.**

"**Touchdown!" said Fred as, with a slight bump, they hit the ground. They had landed next to a tumbledown garage in a small yard, and Harry and Riley looked out for the first time at Ron's house.**

"The best thing I saw that summer," Riley said grinning at the three Weasleys.

**It looked as though it had once been a large stone pigpen, but extra rooms had been added here and there until it was several stories high and so crooked it looked as though it were held up by magic (which Harry reminded himself, it probably was). Four or five chimneys were perched on top of the red roof. A lopsided sign stuck in the ground near the entrance read, THE BURROW. Around the front door lay a jumble of rubber boots and a very rusty cauldron. Several fat brown chickens were pecking their way around the yard.**

"**It's not much," said Ron.**

"It is a bunch!" Harry protested.

"**It's wonderful," said Harry happily, thinking of Privet Drive. Riley nodded in agreement.**

Molly beamed.

**They got out of the car.**

"**Now, we'll go upstairs really quietly," said Fred, "and wait for Mum to call us for breakfast Then, Ron, you come bounding downstairs going, 'Mum, look who turned up in the night!' and she'll be all pleased to see Harry and Riley and no one need ever know we flew the car."**

"**Right," said Ron. "Come on, Harry, I sleep at the — at the top — And Riley, Ginny sleeps - "**

**Ron had gone a nasty greenish colour, his eyes fixed on the house. **

"I think you guys are busted," Arthur said based on Riley's, Harry's, and Ron's similar facial expressions.

**The other four wheeled around.**

**Mrs. Weasley was marching across the yard, scattering chickens, and for a short, plump, kind-faced woman, it was remarkable how much she looked like a saber-toothed tiger.**

Molly glared at the guilty party and shouted, "A saber-toothed tiger?"

Riley hid behind Thomas and Ron hid behind Hermione. Harry dived behind the closest couch.

"Well honey they aren't wrong," Arthur said avoiding looking at Molly.

"**Looks like there's a hitch in the plan Freddie," whispered Riley.**

"**Ah, "said Fred.**

"**Oh, dear," said George.**

**Mrs. Weasley came to a halt in front of them, her hands on her hips, staring from one guilty face to the next. **

"On the bright side it is very effective Mrs. Weasley," Thomas said reaching behind himself and patting Riley's knee.

**She was wearing a flowered apron with a wand sticking out of the pocket.**

"**So," she said.**

"**Morning, Mum," said George, in what he clearly thought was a jaunty, winning voice.**

"He really didn't think that would do anything… did he?" Hermione asked

"**Have you any idea how worried I've been?" said Mrs. Weasley in a deadly whisper.**

"**Sorry, Mum, but see, we had to —"**

**All three of Mrs. Weasley's sons were taller than she was, but they cowered as her rage broke over them.**

"Wimps," Sirius said.

"**Beds empty! No note! Car gone — could have crashed — out of my mind with worry — did you care? — never, as long as I've lived — you wait until your father gets home, we never had trouble like this from Bill or Charlie or Percy —"**

"Mum, I think you should know that we never liked being compared to our older brothers." Ron said.

"I'm sorry," Molly said.

**Harry looked at Riley expecting her to say something. Riley shook her head and gave him a look that said 'She frightens me'.**

"Because she is frightening! Well sometimes…"

"**Perfect Percy," muttered Fred.**

"**YOU COULD DO WITH TAKING A LEAF OUT OF PERCY'S BOOK!" yelled Mrs. Weasley, prodding a finger in Fred's chest. "You could have died, you could have been seen, you could have lost your father his job —"**

**It seemed to go on for hours. Mrs. Weasley had shouted herself hoarse before she turned on Harry and Riley, who backed away.**

Ron chuckled and said, "She never would yell at you guys."

"**I'm very pleased to see you, Harry, Riley, dears," she said. "Come in and have some breakfast."**

Almost everyone gaped at Molly.

**Riley made a quiet choking sound. How did Mrs. Weasley do that?**

"It's one of the universe's mysteries," Arthur said.

**She turned and walked back into the house and Harry and Riley, after a nervous glance at Ron, who nodded encouragingly, followed her.**

**The kitchen was small and rather cramped. There was a scrubbed wooden table and chairs in the middle, and Harry and Riley sat down on the edge of their seats, looking around. They had never been in a wizard house before.**

"But alas wizard houses are old news to you two," Thomas said.

**The clock on the wall opposite him had only one hand and no numbers at all. Written around the edge were things like Time to make tea, Time to feed the chickens, and You're late. Books were stacked three deep on the mantelpiece, books with titles like Charm Your Own Cheese, Enchantment in Baking, and One Minute Feasts — It's Magic! And unless Harry's ears were deceiving him, the old radio next to the sink had just announced that coming up was "Witching Hour, with the popular singing sorceress, Celestina Warbeck."**

**Mrs. Weasley was clattering around, cooking breakfast a little haphazardly, throwing dirty looks at her sons as she threw sausages into the frying pan. Every now and then she muttered things like "don't know what you were thinking of," and "never would have believed it."**

"**I don't blame you, dear," she assured Harry and Riley, tipping eight or nine sausages onto their plates. **

"Which Riley ate all and two off of my plate," Harry said glaring at Riley.

"They were yummy…" Riley said patting her stomach.

"**Arthur and I have been worried about you two, too. Just last night we were saying we'd come and get you ourselves if you hadn't written back to Ron by Friday. But really," (she was now adding three fried eggs to their plates) "flying an illegal car halfway across the country — anyone could have seen you —"**

**She flicked her wand casually at the dishes in the sink, which began to clean themselves, clinking gently in the background.**

"**It was cloudy, Mum!" said Fred.**

"You still could have been seen," Remus pointed out.

"**You keep your mouth closed while you're eating!" Mrs. Weasley snapped.**

"**They were starving him, Mum!" said George.**

"**And you!" said Mrs. Weasley, but it was with a slightly softened expression that she started cutting Harry and Riley's breads and buttering it for them.**

**At that moment there was a diversion in the form of a small, redheaded figure in a long nightdress, who appeared in the kitchen, gave a small squeal, and ran out again.**

"I take it that was Ginny," Frank said.

**Riley smirked and winked at Harry. Harry went a little pink.**

James and Sirius snickered.

"**Ginny," said Ron in an undertone to Harry. "My sister. She's been talking about you all summer."**

"**Yeah, she'll be wanting your autograph, Harry," Fred said with a grin, but he caught his mother's eye and bent his face over his plate without another word. **

**Nothing more was said until all five plates were clean, which took a surprisingly short time.**

"**Blimey, I'm tired," yawned Fred, setting down his knife and fork at last. "I think I'll go to bed and —"**

"**You will not," snapped Mrs. Weasley. "It's your own fault you've been up all night. You're going to de-gnome the garden for me; **

"De-gnoming one of the craziest unofficial wizard sports," Dakota said.

**they're getting completely out of hand again —"**

"**Oh, Mum —"**

"**And you two," she said, glaring at Ron and Fred. "You can go up to bed, dear," she added to Harry and Riley. "You didn't ask them to fly that wretched car —"**

"BUT THEY WERE SAVED BY YOUR SONS MOLLY!" Sirius shouted.

**But Harry, who felt wide awake, said quickly, "I'll help Ron. I've never seen a de-gnoming —"**

**Riley shook her head and said, "Maybe another day, I'll go write to Hermione and Thomas and tell them we are okay."**

"You have no idea how relieved I was when I saw Midnight," Hermione said.

"Yeah, I thought I was imaging it," Thomas said.

"**That's very sweet of you Harry, dear, but it's dull work," said Mrs. Weasley. "Now, let's see what Lockhart's got to say on the subject —"**

**And she pulled a heavy book from the stack on the mantelpiece. George groaned.**

"**Mum, we know how to de-gnome a garden —"**

**Harry looked at the cover of Mrs. Weasley's book. Written across it in fancy gold letters were the words Gilderoy Lockhart's**

"That Ravenclaw git wrote a book?" Lily said not believing it.

**Guide to Household Pests. There was a big photograph on the front of a very good-looking wizard with wavy blond hair and bright blue eyes. As always in the wizarding world, the photograph was moving; the wizard, who Harry supposed was Gilderoy Lockhart, kept winking cheekily up at them all. Mrs. Weasley beamed down at him.**

"**Oh, he is marvelous," she said. "He knows his household pests, all right, it's a wonderful book…"**

"**Mum fancies him," said Fred, in a very audible whisper.**

"MOLLY!" Arthur exclaimed.

Molly went very red. She shook her head.

"I'm a bit weird in the future aren't I?" she asked.

"**Don't be so ridiculous, Fred," said Mrs. Weasley, her cheeks rather pink. "All right, if you think you know better than Lockhart, you can go and get on with it, and woe betide you if there's a single gnome in that garden when I come out to inspect it."**

**Yawning and grumbling, the Weasleys slouched outside with Harry behind them. The garden was large, and in Harry's eyes, exactly what a garden should be. The Dursleys wouldn't have liked it — there were plenty of weeds, and the grass needed cutting — but there were gnarled trees all around the walls, plants Harry had never seen spilling from every flower bed, and a big green pond full of frogs.**

"**Muggles have garden gnomes, too, you know," Harry told Ron they crossed the lawn.**

"But they just stay still and look into your soul," Riley said.

"**Yeah, I've seen those things they think are gnomes," said Ron, bent double with his head in a peony bush, "like fat little Santa Clauses with fishing rods…"**

**There was a violent scuffling noise, the peony bush shuddered, and Ron straightened up. "This is a gnome," he said grimly.**

"**Gerroff me! Gerroff me!" squealed the gnome.**

**It was certainly nothing like Santa Claus. It was small and leathery looking, with a large, knobby, bald head exactly like a potato. **

"Ugly things aren't they?" Alice asked.

**Ron held it at arm's length as it kicked out at him with its horny little feet; he grasped it around the ankles and turned it upside down.**

"**This is what you have to do," he said. He raised the gnome above his head ("Gerroff me!") and started to swing it in great circles like a lasso. Seeing the shocked look on Harry's face, Ron added, "It doesn't hurt them —you've just got to make them really dizzy so they can't find their way back to the gnome holes."**

"Until they decide to come back," Ron said.

**He let go of the gnome's ankles: It flew twenty feet into the air and landed with a thud in the field over the hedge.**

"**Pitiful," said Fred. "I bet I can get mine beyond that stump."**

**Harry learned quickly not to feel too sorry for the gnomes. He decided just to drop the first one he caught over the hedge, but the gnome, sensing weakness, sank its razor-sharp teeth into Harry's finger and he had a hard job shaking it off — until…**

"**Wow, Harry — that must've been fifty feet…"**

"Aw… his first gnome…" James cooed.

**The air was soon thick with flying gnomes.**

"**See, they're not too bright," said George, seizing five or six gnomes at once. "The moment they know the de-gnoming's going on they storm up to have a look. You'd think they'd have learned by now just to stay put."**

**Soon, the crowd of gnomes in the field started walking away in a straggling line, their little shoulders hunched.**

"**They'll be back," said Ron as they watched the gnomes disappear into the hedge on the other side of the field. "They love it here… Dad's too soft with them; he thinks they're funny…"**

"They are."

**Just then, the front door slammed.**

"**He's back!" said George. "Dad's home!"**

**They hurried through the garden and back into the house where the met Riley who was just coming down the stairs.**

"Someone's popular," Frank said.

**Mr. Weasley was slumped in a kitchen chair with his glasses off and his eyes closed. He was a thin man, going bald,**

"MY HAIR!" Arthur shouted touching the hair on his head.

**but the little hair he had was as red as any of his children's. He was wearing long green robes, which were dusty and travel-worn.**

"**What a night," he mumbled, groping for the teapot as they all sat down around him. "Nine raids. Nine! And old Mundungus Fletcher tried to put a hex on me when I had my back turned…"**

Thomas scrunched up his nose. He never did like Mundungus.

**Mr. Weasley took a long gulp of tea and sighed.**

"**Find anything, Dad?" said Fred eagerly.**

"**All I got were a few shrinking door keys and a biting kettle," yawned Mr. Weasley. "There was some pretty nasty stuff that wasn't my department, though. Mortlake was taken away for questioning about some extremely odd ferrets, **

The future generation snickered at the mention of ferrets. Good ol' Moody, who wasn't actually Moody, they thought.

**but that's the Committee on Experimental Charms, thank goodness…"**

"**Why would anyone bother making door keys shrink?" said George.**

"**Just Muggle-baiting," sighed Mr. Weasley. "Sell them a key that keeps shrinking to nothing so they can never find it when they need it… Of course, it's very hard to convict anyone because no Muggle would admit their key keeps shrinking — they'll insist they just keep losing it. Bless them, they'll go to any lengths to ignore magic, even if it's staring them in the face… But the things our lot have taken to enchanting, you wouldn't believe —"**

"How have you not noticed the two extra kids yet, Arthur?" Lily asked.

"**LIKE CARS, FOR INSTANCE?"**

**Mrs. Weasley had appeared, holding a long poker like a sword. Mr. Weasley's eyes jerked open. He stared guiltily at his wife.**

"Like he should" Molly said stiffly.

"**C-cars, Molly, dear?"**

"**Yes, Arthur, cars," said Mrs. Weasley, her eyes flashing. "Imagine a wizard buying a rusty old car and telling his wife all he wanted to do with it was take it apart to see how it worked, while really he was enchanting it to make it fly."**

**Mr. Weasley blinked.**

"**Well, dear, I think you'll find that he would be quite within the law to do that, even if — er — he maybe would have done better to, um, tell his wife the truth… There's a loophole in the law, you'll find… As long as he wasn't intending to fly the car, the fact that the car could fly wouldn't —"**

"Loopholes! They can get you around anything." Sirius said.

"**Arthur Weasley, you made sure there was a loophole when you wrote that law!" shouted Mrs. Weasley. "Just so you could carry on tinkering with all that Muggle rubbish in your shed! And for your information, Harry and Riley arrived this morning in the car you weren't intending to fly!"**

"**Harry and Riley?" said Mr. Weasley blankly. "Harry and Riley who?"**

Everyone laughed except for Arthur.

**He looked around, saw Harry and Riley, and jumped.**

"**Good lord, is it Harry Potter? And Riley…" said Mr. Weasley pausing.**

"Sometimes I don't think you were pausing because you didn't know my name. I think you didn't want to say my name." Riley said to Arthur.

"**Black," said Riley.**

"**Very pleased to meet you both, Ron's told us so much about —"**

"**Your sons flew that car to Harry and Riley's house and back last night!" shouted Mrs. Weasley. "What have you got to say about that, eh?"**

"**Did you really?" said Mr. Weasley eagerly. "Did it go all right? **

Laughter filled the room. Molly glared at Arthur who stared at the ground.

**I — I mean," he faltered as sparks flew from Mrs. Weasley's eyes, "that — that was very wrong, boys — very wrong indeed…"**

"Something tells me you really see anything wrong with this," Hermione said.

**Riley tried to hide her smirk by keeping a straight face. Her lips twitched.**

"**Let's leave them to it," Ron muttered to Harry and Riley as Mrs. Weasley swelled like a bullfrog. "Come on, I'll show you my bedroom."**

**They slipped out of the kitchen and down a narrow passageway to an uneven staircase, which wound its way, zigzagging up through the house. On the third landing, a door stood ajar. Harry just caught sight of a pair of bright brown eyes staring at him before it closed with a snap.**

"Does she stalk you Harry?" Sirius asked.

"We are engaged!" Harry exclaimed taking offense to Sirius's comment.

"Congratulations!" Lily said hugging son.

"Now all we need to figure out who the other four end up with," Dakota said.

"**Ginny," said Ron. "You don't know how weird it is for her to be this shy. She never shuts up normally —"**

**They climbed two more flights until they reached a door with peeling paint and a small plaque on it, saying RONALD'S ROOM.**

**Harry and Riley stepped in, Harry's head almost touching the sloping ceiling and Riley's touching the ceiling, and blinked. It was like walking into a furnace: Nearly everything in Ron's room seemed to be a violent shade of orange: **

"Chudley Cannons, I'm guessing?" Remus asked.

Ron nodded.

**the bedspread, the walls, even the ceiling. Then Harry and Riley realized that Ron had covered nearly every inch of the shabby wallpaper with posters of the same seven witches and wizards, all wearing bright orange robes, carrying broomsticks, and waving energetically.**

"**Your Quidditch team?" said Harry.**

"**The Chudley Cannons," said Ron, pointing at the orange bedspread, which was emblazoned with two giant black C's and a speeding cannonball. "Ninth in the league."**

"**Your room really brings out your hair Ronald," teased Riley. Ron scowled at her.**

"But it really did bring out your hair!"

"Shut up Riley."

**Ron's school spellbooks were stacked untidily in a corner, next to a pile of comics that all seemed to feature The Adventures of Martin Miggs, the Mad Muggle. **

"A really awful comic," Thomas said.

**Ron's magic wand was lying on top of a fish tank full of frog spawn on the windowsill, next to his fat gray rat, Scabbers, who was snoozing in a patch of sun.**

Ron shuddered at the thought of Scabbers.

**Harry and Riley stepped over a pack of Self-Shuffling playing cards on the floor and looked out of the tiny window. In the field far below they could see a gang of gnomes sneaking one by one back through the Weasleys' hedge. Then they turned to look at Ron, who was watching them almost nervously, as though waiting for their opinion.**

"**It's a bit small," said Ron quickly. "Not like that room you had with the Muggles. And I'm right underneath the ghoul in the attic; he's always banging on the pipes and groaning…"**

"You had the best room in the house Ron!" Harry said.

**But Harry, grinning widely, said, "This is the best house I've ever been in."**

**Riley grinned widely and nodded.**

**Ron's ears went pink.**

"And that is the end of this chapter," Arthur said handing the book to Molly.

"It was a very funny chapter," Alice said.


	4. At Flourish and Blott's

"**At Flourish and Blott's**," Molly read.

Sirius groaned.

**Life at the Burrow was as different as possible from life on Privet Drive. The Dursleys liked everything neat and ordered; the Weasleys' house burst with the strange and unexpected. **

"Just the way it's supposed to be," Ron said grinning.

**Harry and Riley got a shock the first time he looked in the mirror over the kitchen mantelpiece and it shouted, "Tuck your shirt in, scruffy!"**

"I take it the mirror was talking to Harry," Frank said.

"I highly doubt someone would call a girl scruffy," Alice said.

**The ghoul in the attic howled and dropped pipes whenever he felt things were getting too quiet, **

"On the bright side there were never any awkward moments," Riley said.

**and small explosions from Fred and George's bedroom were considered perfectly normal. **

"I'd assume so," Molly groaned.

**What Harry and Riley found most unusual about life at Ron's, however, wasn't the talking mirror or the clanking ghoul: It was the fact that everybody there seemed to like them.**

"It's because we are so likeable," Harry said.

"Voldemort didn't like you."

"Neither did Draco."

"Or Snape."

"Umbridge hates you."

"Deatheaters don't like you."

"Or Slytherins."

"Face it Harry… a lot of people don't like you."

**Mrs. Weasley fussed over the state of his socks and tried to force him to eat fourth helpings at every meal, which Riley always accepted.**

"One of the many reasons she is my daughter," Sirius said proudly.

**Mr. Weasley liked Harry and Riley to sit next to him at the dinner table so that he could bombard them with questions about life with Muggles, asking them to explain how things like plugs and the postal service worked.**

"**Fascinating," he would say as Harry talked him through using a telephone. "Ingenious, really, how many ways Muggles have found of getting along without magic."**

"Well that's because they've got technology and stuff," Lily said.

**Harry and Riley heard from Hogwarts one sunny morning about a week after they had arrived at the Burrow. Harry and Ron went down to breakfast to find Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Ginny, and Riley already sitting at the kitchen table. The moment Ginny saw Harry, she accidentally knocked her porridge bowl to the floor with a loud clatter. **

"She had it bad for you, Harry," Thomas said chuckling.

**Ginny seemed very prone to knocking things over whenever Harry entered a room. She dived under the table to retrieve the bowl and emerged with her face glowing like the setting sun. Pretending he hadn't noticed this, Harry sat down and took the toast Mrs. Weasley offered him.**

"That was very polite of you… and very un-James," Remus said.

"What's wrong with me?" James asked.

"Well for starters your hair."

"And your glasses," Sirius pointed out.

"I see it is 'Let's Bash Our Friend James' day," said James in flat tone.

"**Letters from school," said Mr. Weasley, passing Harry, Ron, and Riley identical envelopes of yellowish parchment, addressed in green ink. "Dumbledore already knows you're here, Harry, Riley — doesn't miss a trick, that man. **

"He must be the smartest person on Earth,"

**You two've got them, too," he added, as Fred and George ambled in, still in their pajamas.**

**For a few minutes there was silence as they all read their letters. Harry and Riley's told them to catch the Hogwarts Express as usual from King's Cross station on September first. There was also a list of the new books they'd need for the coming year.**

The future generation groaned.

**SECOND-YEAR STUDENTS WILL REQUIRE:**

**The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 2 by Miranda Goshawk**

**Break with a Banshee by Gilderoy Lockhart**

**Gadding with Ghouls by Gilderoy Lockhart**

**Holidays with Hags by Gilderoy Lockhart**

**Travels with Trolls by Gilderoy Lockhart**

**Voyages with Vampires by Gilderoy Lockhart**

**Wanderings with Werewolves by Gilderoy Lockhart**

**Year with the Yeti by Gilderoy Lockhart**

"THE GIT WROTE MORE?" Dakota shouted.

There was an uproar in the room.

**Fred, who had finished his own list, peered over at Harry's.**

"**You've been told to get all Lockhart's books, too!" he said. "The new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher must be a fan — bet it's a witch."**

"Married too," Frank said.

"**Married too," added Riley.**

Frank snorted and said, "Two great minds think alike."

**At this point, Fred and Riley caught Mrs. Weasley's eye and quickly busied themselves with the marmalade.**

"Ooh they're in trouble," Hermione teased.

"**That lot won't come cheap," said George, with a quick look at his parents. "Lockhart's books are really expensive…"**

"**Well, we'll manage," said Mrs. Weasley, but she looked worried. "I expect we'll be able to pick up a lot of Ginny's things secondhand."**

"It's not fair you guys practically had to spend all your money buy your schoolbooks," Riley said crossing her arms, "It's not fair. You guys are the nicest people on earth."

Molly gave her a small smile.

"**Oh, are you starting at Hogwarts this year?" Harry asked Ginny.**

**She nodded, blushing to the roots of her flaming hair, and put her elbow in the butter dish. Fortunately no one saw this except Harry, because just then Ron's elder brother Percy walked in. He was already dressed, his Hogwarts prefect badge pinned to his sweater vest.**

Everyone rolled their eyes.

"**Morning, all," said Percy briskly. "Lovely day."**

**He sat down in the only remaining chair but leapt up again almost immediately, pulling from underneath him a molting, gray feather duster — at least, that was what Harry and Riley thought it was, until they saw that it was breathing.**

"The feather duster's alive?" Sirius asked.

Ron shook his head and said, "No, it was just Errol."

"**Errol!" said Ron, taking the limp owl from Percy and extracting a letter from under its wing. "Finally— he's got Hermione's and Thomas's answers. I wrote to them saying we were going to try and rescue you two from the Dursleys."**

**He carried Errol to a perch just inside the back door and tried to stand him on it, but Errol flopped straight off again so Ron lay him on the draining board instead, muttering, "Pathetic."**

"Poor thing," Molly said.

**Then he ripped open Hermione's letter and read it out loud:**

"**Dear Ron, and Harry and Riley if you're there,**

"**I hope everything went all right and that Harry and Riley are okay and that you didn't do anything illegal to get them out, **

"Well it was pretty illegal," Remus said.

**Ron, because that would get Harry and Riley into trouble, too. **

"But, it did not," James said.

**I've been really worried and if Harry and Riley are all right, will you please let me know at once, but perhaps it would be better if you used a different owl because I think another delivery might finish your one off.**

"That's what everyone always said," Ron said.

"**I'm very busy with schoolwork, of course'— How can she be?" said Ron in horror. "We're on holiday! **

"But we still had homework Ronald!" Hermione said.

"It was summer," Ron argued, "Besides I did eventually."

"Yeah, the last three days before we went back to school," Harry said.

—'**and we're going to London next Wednesday to buy my new books. Why don't we meet in Diagon Alley? Let me know what's happening as soon as you can. **

**Love from Hermione."**

**Ron picked up and opened Thomas's letter and read it aloud:**

"**Dear Ron, and Harry and Riley if you are there,**

"It's weird how we had the same header," Thomas said to Hermione.

**Hopefully operation 'Find-Out-What-The-Heck-Happened-To-Harry-And-Riley-And-Make-Sure-They-Are-Fine' worked out.**

"That is a very long name for an operation," Arthur said.

**Also that you guys didn't have to go to drastic illegal measures. I doubt you did, but still… **

Riley shrugged and said, "We've done a bunch of illegal stuff."

Lily raised an eye at her. "Exactly what illegal stuff?"

"Just the usual…"

**I've been really worried them and it would be great if you could let me know right away, but please I beg you use a different owl! The poor guy collapsed on my desk while I was doing homework. **

"See! I wasn't the only one doing homework!" Hermione exclaimed.

**For a brief second I thought he was a feather duster. **

"Don't we all?" Dakota asked.

**Anyway I'm going to Diagon Alley on Wednesday so could we meet there? I'm not sure when Hermione is going.**

**Sincerely Thomas.**

"Thomas doesn't love you guys?" Sirius asked.

"No, I hate their guts," Thomas said sarcastically.

**P.S. Do you by any chance know the answer to number five on our potions homework."**

"That is very un-Remus," Lily said.

"**Well, that fits in nicely, we can go and get all your things on Wednesday then, too," said Mrs. Weasley, starting to clear the table. "What're you all up to today?"**

**Harry, Riley, Ron, Fred, and George were planning to go up the hill to a small paddock the Weasleys owned. It was surrounded by trees that blocked it from view of the village below, meaning that they could practice Quidditch there, as long as they didn't fly too high.**

"It would be unfortunate if you were hit by an areoplane," Arthur said.

**They couldn't use real Quidditch balls, which would have been hard to explain if they had escaped and flown away over the village; instead they threw apples for one another to catch. They took turns riding Harry and Riley's Nimbus Two Thousands, which was easily the best broom; Ron's old Shooting Star was often outstripped by passing butterflies.**

"Well at least the butterflies felt more confident after that," James said.

"And that's all that is important Uncle James," Riley said.

**Five minutes later they were marching up the hill, broomsticks over their shoulders. They had asked Percy if he wanted to join them, but he had said he was busy. **

"What is he up to?" Frank asked.

"He was writing to his very secret girlfriend," Ron answered.

**Harry and Riley had only seen Percy at mealtimes so far; he stayed shut in his room the rest of the time.**

"Which wasn't a bad thing," Harry said.

"**Wish I knew what he was up to," said Fred, frowning. "He's not himself. His exam results came the day before you did; twelve O.W.L.s and he hardly gloated at all."**

"**Ordinary Wizarding Levels," George explained, seeing Harry and Riley's puzzled looks. "Bill got twelve, too. If we're not careful, we'll have another Head Boy in the family. I don't think I could stand the shame."**

"I don't see how that's a bad thing…" Lily said.

Thomas shrugged and said, "Fred and George were never prefects or Head Boy, and those things were expected in their family. But Ginny was never a prefect or Head Girl either."

**Bill was the oldest Weasley brother. He and the next brother, Charlie, had already left Hogwarts. Harry had never met either of them, but knew that Charlie was in Romania studying dragons and Bill in Egypt working for the wizard's bank, Gringotts.**

"**Dunno how Mum and Dad are going to afford all our school stuff this year," said George after a while. "Five sets of Lockhart books! And Ginny needs robes and a wand and everything…"**

Molly and Arthur frowned.

**Harry and Riley said nothing. They felt a bit awkward. Stored in an underground vault at Gringotts in London were small fortunes that their parents had left them. **

"At least you guys never brought up your wealth like a certain Malfoy we know," Ron said.

**Of course, it was only in the wizarding world that they had money; you couldn't use Galleons, Sickles, and Knuts in Muggle shops. They had never mentioned their Gringotts bank accounts to the Dursleys; they didn't think their horror of anything connected with magic would stretch to a large pile of gold.**

**Mrs. Weasley woke them all early the following Wednesday. After a quick half a dozen bacon sandwiches each, they pulled on their coats and Mrs. Weasley took a flowerpot off the kitchen mantelpiece and peered inside.**

"I take you guys were Flooing," Dakota said. She never had liked that way of traveling.

"**We're running low, Arthur," she sighed. "We'll have to buy some more today… Ah well, guests first! After you, Harry, Riley, dears!"**

**And she offered them the flowerpot.**

**Harry and Riley stared at them all watching them.**

Everyone looked at Molly.

"Why would you think they knew how to Floo?" Alice asked.

"I don't know!" Molly said putting up her hands in mock surrender.

"**W-what are we supposed to do?" Harry stammered.**

"**They never traveled by Floo powder," said Ron suddenly. "Sorry, Harry, Riley, I forgot."**

"**Never?" said Mr. Weasley. "But how did you get to Diagon Alley to buy your school things last year?"**

"**We went on the Underground —"**

"**Really?" said Mr. Weasley eagerly. "Were there escapators? **

Lily, Hermione, Harry, and Riley laughed.

**How exactly —"**

"**Escalators, Mr. Weasley," corrected Riley.**

"How do they work?" Arthur asked.

Harry shrugged.

"**How do they-"**

"**Not now, Arthur," said Mrs. Weasley. "Floo powder's a lot quicker, dear, but goodness me, if you've never used it before —"**

"**They'll be all right, Mum," said Fred. "Harry, Riley, watch us first."**

**He took a pinch of glittering powder out of the flowerpot, stepped up to the fire, and threw the powder into the flames.**

**With a roar, the fire turned emerald green and rose higher than Fred, who stepped right into it, shouted, "Diagon Alley!" and vanished.**

"He made it look so easy," Riley said.

"**You must speak clearly, dear," Mrs. Weasley told Harry as George dipped his hand into the flowerpot. "And be sure to get out at the right grate…"**

"**The right what?" said Harry nervously as the fire roared and whipped George out of sight, too.**

"Maybe Harry should go after Riley," Remus said, "Harry you were obviously confused."

"**Well, there are an awful lot of wizard fires to choose from, you know, but as long as you've spoken clearly-"**

"**He'll be fine, Molly, don't fuss," said Mr. Weasley, helping himself to Floo powder too.**

"**But, dear, if he got lost, how would we ever explain to his aunt and uncle?"**

"I doubt they would care." Frank said.

"**They'd care less," said Riley then muttered; "Besides we don't have life insurance…"**

"What's that?" Arthur asked.

Riley shrugged and said, "No too sure, but Dudley had it."

"**They wouldn't mind," Harry reassured her. "Dudley would think it was a brilliant joke if I got lost up a chimney, don't worry about that —"**

"**Well… all right… you Harry go after Arthur," said Mrs. Weasley. "Now, when you get into the fire, say where you're going."**

"**And keep your elbows tucked in," Ron advised.**

"**And your eyes shut," said Mrs. Weasley. "The soot —"**

"**Don't fidget," said Ron. "Or you might well fall out of the wrong fireplace —"**

"**But don't panic and get out too early; wait until you see Fred and George."**

"I have a feeling you were not able to comprehend that," Lily said.

**Trying hard to bear all this in mind, Harry took a pinch of Floo powder and walked to the edge of the fire. He took a deep breath, scattered the powder into the flames, and stepped forward; the fire felt like a warm breeze; he opened his mouth and immediately swallowed a lot of hot ash.**

"**D-Dia-gon Alley," he coughed.**

"This won't end well…" Dakota said.

**It felt as though he was being sucked down a giant drain. He seemed to be spinning very fast — the roaring in his ears was deafening — he tried to keep his eyes open but the whirl of green flames made him feel sick —something hard knocked his elbow and he tucked it in tightly, still spinning and spinning — now it felt as though cold hands were slapping his face — squinting through his glasses he saw a blurred stream of fireplaces and snatched glimpses of the rooms beyond — his bacon sandwiches were churning inside him — he closed his eyes again wishing it would stop, and then…**

**He fell, face forward, onto cold stone and felt the bridge of his glasses snap.**

"Good thing Harry has unbreakable glasses now," Thomas said.

**Dizzy and bruised, covered in soot, he got gingerly to his feet, holding his broken glasses up to his eyes. He was quite alone, but where he was, he had no idea. All he could tell was that he was standing in the stone fireplace of what looked like a large, dimly lit wizard's shop — but nothing in here was ever likely to be on a Hogwarts school list.**

**A glass case nearby held a withered hand on a cushion, a bloodstained pack of cards, **

"Gross," several people said.

**and a staring glass eye. Evil-looking masks stared down from the walls, an assortment of human bones lay upon the counter, and rusty, spiked instruments hung from the ceiling. Even worse, the dark, narrow street Harry could see through the dusty shop window was definitely not Diagon Alley.**

"You must have been in Knockturn Alley," Sirius said.

"How do you know?" Dakota asked.

"Well Dakota, my family is a very Malfoyish family."

**The sooner he got out of here, the better. Nose still stinging where it had hit the hearth, Harry made his way swiftly and silently toward the door, but before he'd got halfway toward it, two people appeared on the other side of the glass — and one of them was the very last person Harry wanted to meet when he was lost, covered in soot, and wearing broken glasses: Draco Malfoy.**

Everyone groaned.

"How peachy," Sirius said.

**Harry looked quickly around and spotted a large black cabinet to his left; he shot inside it and pulled the doors closed, leaving a small crack to peer through. **

**Seconds later, a bell clanged, and Malfoy stepped into the shop.**

"At least it can't get worse…" Arthur said.

**The man who followed could only be Draco's father. He had the same pale, pointed face and identical cold, gray eyes. **

"Never mind…"

**Mr. Malfoy crossed the shop, looking lazily at the items on display, and rang a bell on the counter before turning to his son and saying, "Touch nothing, Draco."**

Alice snorted and said, "Like he'll listen."

**Malfoy, who had reached for the glass eye, said, "I thought you were going to buy me a present."**

"**I said I would buy you a racing broom," said his father, drumming his fingers on the counter.**

"**What's the good of that if I'm not on the House team?" **

"Do my ears conceive me?" Frank said, "Draco not caring about something expensive?"

**said Malfoy, looking sulky and bad-tempered. "Harry Potter got a Nimbus Two Thousand last year. Special permission from Dumbledore so he could play for Gryffindor. He's not even that good, it's just because he's famous… famous for having a stupid scar on his forehead…"**

Remus snorted and said, "He is really jealous of you."

**Malfoy bent down to examine a shelf full of skulls.**

"… **everyone thinks he's so smart, wonderful Potter with his scar and his broomstick —"**

"Actually very jealous."

"**You have told me this at least a dozen times already," **

"So Draco hates you Harry, but he talks about you all the time?" Dakota said a bit confused.

**said Mr. Malfoy, with a quelling look at his son. "And I would remind you that it is not — prudent — to appear less than fond of Harry Potter, not when most of our kind regard him as the hero who made the Dark Lord disappear — ah, Mr. Borgin."**

**A stooping man had appeared behind the counter, smoothing his greasy hair back from his face.**

"Greasy hair?" James said. "Must be related to Snape!"

"**Mr. Malfoy, what a pleasure to see you again," said Mr. Borgin in a voice as oily as his hair. "Delighted — and young Master Malfoy, too — charmed. How may I be of assistance? I must show you, just in today, and very reasonably priced —"**

"**I'm not buying today, Mr. Borgin, but selling," said Mr. Malfoy.**

Arthur raised an eyebrow.

"**Selling?" The smile faded slightly from Mr. Borgin's face.**

"**You have heard, of course, that the Ministry is conducting more raids," said Mr. Malfoy, taking a roll of parchment from his inside pocket and unraveling it for Mr. Borgin to read. "I have a few — ah — items at home that might embarrass me, if the Ministry were to call…"**

Arthur grinned evilly.

"Mum… Dad's ginning evilly!"

"Are you okay Mr. Weasley?"

"He hasn't made this face in years!"

"His face is going to freeze."

"That is the ugliest face I've ever seen someone make."

**Mr. Borgin fixed a pair of pince-nez to his nose and looked down the list.**

"**The Ministry wouldn't presume to trouble you, sir, surely?"**

"Oh they would've," Thomas said.

**Mr. Malfoy's lip curled.**

"**I have not been visited yet. The name Malfoy still commands a certain respect, yet the Ministry grows ever more meddlesome. There are rumors about a new Muggle Protection Act — no doubt that flea-bitten, Muggle-loving fool Arthur Weasley is behind it —"**

"WHAT DID HE JUST CALL HIM?" several people shouted.

"THE NERVE!"

"THAT ARSE!"

"I'M PRETTY SURE MR. WEASLEY DOESN'T HAVE FLEAS!"

"Thanks guys," Arthur said.

**Harry felt a hot surge of anger.**

"— **and as you see, certain of these poisons might make it appear —"**

"**I understand, sir, of course," said Mr. Borgin. "Let me see…"**

"**Can I have that?" interrupted Draco, pointing at the withered hand on its cushion.**

"That must be the Hand of Glory," Sirius said.

Everyone looked at him.

"I can't help what I know!"

"**Ah, the Hand of Glory!" said Mr. Borgin, abandoning Mr. Malfoy's list and scurrying over to Draco. "Insert a candle and it gives light only to the holder! Best friend of thieves and plunderers! Your son has fine taste, sir."**

"Fine taste in what?" Riley asked, "Severed body parts?"

"**I hope my son will amount to more than a thief or a plunderer, Borgin," said Mr. Malfoy coldly, and Mr. Borgin said quickly, "No offense, sir, no offense meant —"**

"**Though if his grades don't pick up," said Mr. Malfoy, more coldly still, "that may indeed be all he is fit for —"**

Several people snickered at this.

"**It's not my fault," retorted Draco. "The teachers all have favorites, that Hermione Granger —"**

"Hermione happens to be very smart," Harry said, "It is a blessing yet a curse at the same time."

Hermione crossed her arms.

"**I would have thought you'd be ashamed that a girl of no wizard family beat you in every exam," snapped Mr. Malfoy.**

"**Ha!" said Harry under his breath, pleased to see Draco looking both abashed and angry.**

"Aren't we all?" James said.

"**It's the same all over," said Mr. Borgin, in his oily voice. "Wizard blood is counting for less everywhere —"**

"**Not with me," said Mr. Malfoy, his long nostrils flaring.**

"There will be less purebloods," Thomas said, "Most of the purebloods I know are in a relationship with a half-blood or a Muggle-born. Like um… some people in this room. So raise your hand if you're pureblooded."

Sirius, James, Arthur, Frank, Molly, Dakota, Alice, Ron, and Riley raised their hands.

"And now raise your hand if you're in a relationship – or end up with – a half-blood or Muggle-born."

James, Ron, and Riley raised their hands.

"So if these three have an offspring with the half-blood or Muggle-born the offspring is a half-blood."

"Thank you Thomas for telling us that half-bloods will make up most of the wizard population," Riley said sarcastically.

"Did really need to explain that, Thomas?" Ron asked.

"**No, sir, nor with me, sir," said Mr. Borgin, with a deep bow.**

"**In that case, perhaps we can return to my list," said Mr. Malfoy shortly. "I am in something of a hurry, Borgin, I have important business elsewhere today —"**

"I wonder where elsewhere is," Dakota said.

**They started to haggle. Harry watched nervously as Draco drew nearer and nearer to his hiding place, examining the objects for sale. Draco paused to examine a long coil of hangman's rope and to read, smirking, the card propped on a magnificent necklace of opals, Caution: Do Not Touch. Cursed — Has Claimed the Lives of Nineteen Muggle Owners to Date.**

Lily and Hermione gasped.

**Draco turned away and saw the cabinet right in front of him. He walked forward — he stretched out his hand for the handle.**

"Don't open the cabinet Draco!" James shouted.

"Harry is secretly hiding in it!" Sirius shouted.

"**Done," said Mr. Malfoy at the counter. "Come, Draco —"**

**Harry wiped his forehead on his sleeve as Draco turned away.**

"That was too close," Lily said.

"**Good day to you, Mr. Borgin. I'll expect you at the manor tomorrow to pick up the goods."**

**The moment the door had closed, Mr. Borgin dropped his oily manner.**

"**Good day yourself, Mister Malfoy, and if the stories are true, you haven't sold me half of what's hidden in your manor…"**

"There must be loads of dark magic items in his manor," Frank said.

The next generation exchanged glances.

**Muttering darkly, Mr. Borgin disappeared into a back room. Harry waited for a minute in case he came back, then, quietly as he could, slipped out of the cabinet, past the glass cases, and out of the shop door.**

**Clutching his broken glasses to his face, **

"I bet that didn't look weird at all," Alice said.

"It looked really odd," Hermione said.

**Harry stared around. He had emerged into a dingy alleyway that seemed to be made up entirely of shops devoted to the Dark Arts. The one he'd just left, Borgin and Burkes, looked like the largest, but opposite was a nasty window display of shrunken heads and, two doors down, a large cage was alive with gigantic black spiders. **

Ron violently shuddered.

**Two shabby-looking wizards were watching him from the shadow of a doorway, muttering to each other. Feeling jumpy, Harry set off, trying to hold his glasses on straight and hoping against hope he'd be able to find a way out of here.**

"You're doomed Harry! Doomed!" Sirius said.

**An old wooden street sign hanging over a shop selling poisonous candles told him he was in Knockturn Alley. This didn't help, as Harry had never heard of such a place. He supposed he hadn't spoken clearly enough through his mouthful of ashes back in the Weasleys' fire. Trying to stay calm, he wondered what to do.**

"**Not lost are you, my dear?" said a voice in his ear, making him jump.**

**An aged witch stood in front of him, holding a tray of what looked horribly like whole human fingernails. **

"That's probably what they are," Molly said scrunching her nose.

**She leered at him, showing mossy teeth. Harry backed away.**

"**I'm fine, thanks," he said. "I'm just —"**

"**HARRY! What d'yeh think yer doin' down there?"**

"I know that grammar anywhere," Frank said.

"IT'S HAGRID!" several people shouted.

**Harry's heart leapt. So did the witch; a load of fingernails cascaded down over her feet and she cursed as the massive form of Hagrid, the Hogwarts' gamekeeper, came striding toward them, beetle-black eyes flashing over his great bristling beard.**

"**Hagrid!" Harry croaked in relief. "I was lost — Floo powder —"**

**Hagrid seized Harry by the scruff of the neck and pulled him away from the witch, **

"Sometimes Hagrid's strength is frightening," Remus said.

**knocking the tray right out of her hands. Her shrieks followed them all the way along the twisting alleyway out into bright sunlight. Harry saw a familiar, snow-white marble building in the distance — Gringotts Bank. Hagrid had steered him right into Diagon Alley.**

"**Yer a mess!" **

"What did he expect?" Molly said

**said Hagrid gruffly; brushing soot off Harry so forcefully he nearly knocked him into a barrel of dragon dung outside an apothecary. **

"**Skulkin' around Knockturn Alley, I dunno dodgy place, Harry — don' want no one ter see yeh down there —"**

"He's lost," Lily said.

"**I realized that," said Harry, ducking as Hagrid made to brush him off again. "I told you, I was lost — what were **_**you**_** doing down there, anyway?"**

Dakota crossed her fingers and said, "Please don't be another pet that could possibly kill our children…"

"**I was lookin' fer a Flesh-Eatin' Slug Repellent," growled Hagrid. "They're ruinin' the school cabbages. Yer not on yer own?"**

"**I'm staying with the Weasleys, Riley's there too of course, but we got separated," Harry explained. "I've got to go and find them…"**

"SPOILER! He does find us," Riley said.

**They set off together down the street.**

"**How come yeh two never wrote back ter me?" said Hagrid as Harry jogged alongside him (he had to take three steps to every stride of Hagrid's enormous boots). Harry explained all about Dobby and the Dursleys.**

"How many times did you have to explain that," Arthur asked.

"Oh, just a bunch of times," Harry said.

"**Lousy Muggles," growled Hagrid. "If I'd've known —"**

"**Harry! Harry! Over here!"**

"I wonder who that could be," Alice said.

**Harry looked up and saw Hermione Granger standing at the top of the white flight of steps to Gringotts. She ran down to meet them, her bushy brown hair flying behind her.**

"Your hair was really bushy when we were younger," Riley said poking Hermione's hair.

"Don't touch my hair Riley."

"Sorry Herms."

"Don't call me Herms!"

"**What happened to your glasses? Hello, Hagrid — oh, it's wonderful to see you two again — are you coming into Gringotts, Harry?"**

"You also talked fast," Ron said.

"You still do," Thomas said.

"**As soon as I've found the Weasleys and Riley," said Harry.**

"**Yeh won't have long ter wait," Hagrid said with a grin.**

**Harry and Hermione looked around. Sprinting up the crowded street were Riley, Ron, Fred, George, Percy, and Mr. Weasley.**

"I bet it would have been better if Riley red hair like the others," James said, "Then Riley wouldn't be the outsider.

"**HERMS!" Riley squealed, tackling Hermione to the ground and gave her a hug.**

"Your tackle-hugs really hurt," Hermione said.

"BUT THEY ARE FULL OF LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP!" Riley shouted.

"**Harry," Mr. Weasley panted. "We hoped you'd only gone one grate too far…" He mopped his glistening bald patch. **

"My poor hair…" Arthur whined.

**"Molly's frantic — she's coming now —"**

"**Where did you come out?" Ron asked.**

"**Knockturn Alley," said Hagrid grimly.**

"**Excellent!" said Fred and George together.**

"It's not really excellent," Sirius said.

"It's more like creepy," Harry said.

"**We've never been allowed in," said Ron enviously.**

"**I should ruddy well think not," growled Hagrid. Mrs. Weasley now came galloping into view, her handbag swinging wildly in one hand, Ginny just clinging onto the other.**

"**Oh, Harry — oh, my dear — you could have been anywhere —"**

**Gasping for breath she pulled a large clothes brush out of her bag and began sweeping off the soot Hagrid hadn't managed to beat away. **

"That was very motherly," Remus said.

**Mr. Weasley took Harry's glasses, gave them a tap of his wand, and returned them, good as new.**

"**Well, gotta be off," said Hagrid, who was having his hand wrung by Mrs. Weasley ("Knockturn Alley! If you hadn't found him, Hagrid!").**

"What would we do without Hagrid?" Frank said.

**"See yer at Hogwarts!" And he strode away, head and shoulders taller than anyone else in the packed street.**

"**GUYS!" they heard someone shout.**

"It could only be one person," James said.

"Neville," Sirius said.

Thomas rolled his eyes.

**It was Thomas running towards them. He skidded to a halt in front of them. **

"**TOMMY!" Riley shouted tackling him to the ground and gave him a hug.**

"We are being serious when we say they hurt," Thomas said.

"You're not Sirius, I am," Sirius said.

"**Ran all - the way - from The Leaky - Cauldron," said Thomas panting.**

"**Where's your uncle?" asked Harry.**

"Yeah where is he?" Remus asked.

"**Out of country," **

"What?"

**said Thomas. "He's an Auror and he's got to go searching for some guy or whatever. It'll be a few days until he's back."**

"He was out of the country and left you home alone?"

"Well he didn't do it all time," Thomas explained, "Sometimes he would make me stay with my Grandfather."

"**So your home alone?" asked Riley**

"**I've been doing it for years."**

"On the bright side I was able to cook," Thomas said.

"**Guess who I saw in Borgin and Burkes?" Harry asked Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley as they climbed the Gringotts steps. "Malfoy and his father."**

"**Did Lucius Malfoy buy anything?" said Mr. Weasley sharply behind them.**

"Arthur… don't be so nosy," Molly said.

"**No, he was selling —"**

"**So he's worried," said Mr. Weasley with grim satisfaction. "Oh, I'd love to get Lucius Malfoy for something…"**

"You better be careful," Molly said, "The family's trouble. Don't bite off more than you can chew."

"**You be careful, Arthur," said Mrs. Weasley sharply as they were bowed into the bank by a goblin at the door. "That family's trouble. Don't go biting off more than you can chew —"**

Molly shrugged.

"**So you don't think I'm a match for Lucius Malfoy?" said Mr. Weasley indignantly, but he was distracted almost at once by the sight of Hermione's parents, **

"Ooh! Muggles!" Arthur exclaimed.

There was scattered laughter in the room.

**who were standing nervously at the counter that ran all along the great marble hall, waiting for Hermione to introduce them.**

"**But you're Muggles!" said Mr. Weasley delightedly. "We must have a drink! What's that you've got there? Oh, you're changing Muggle money. Molly, look!" He pointed excitedly at the ten-pound notes in Mr. Granger's hand.**

Many people burst into fits of laughter.

"**Meet you back here," Ron said to Hermione as the Weasleys, Thomas, Harry, and Riley were led off to their underground vaults by another Gringotts goblin.**

**The vaults were reached by means of small, goblin-driven carts that sped along miniature train tracks through the bank's underground tunnels. Harry and Riley enjoyed the breakneck journey down to the Weasleys' vault, **

"It feels like you're on a rollercoaster," Hermione said, "Though my parents really didn't enjoy it."

**but felt dreadful, far worse than Harry had in Knockturn Alley, when it was opened. There was a very small pile of silver Sickles inside, and just one gold Galleon. **

Molly's eyes watered. Dakota, lily, and Alice threw their arms around her.

"It's not fair!" Dakota exclaimed.

"You deserve to be rich unlike the Malfoy's," Lily said.

"You guys work so hard!" Alice exclaimed.

**Mrs. Weasley felt right into the corners before sweeping the whole lot into her bag.**

**When Thomas's vault was opened their small pile, not as small as the Weasleys', of Sickles and Galleons. Thomas quickly took most of the pile and rejoined everyone in cart.**

"Wouldn't you have more money than that?" Frank asked.

"My uncle liked to spend money… a lot," Thomas said frowning. "The man was very irresponsible."

**Harry and Riley felt even worse when they reached their vaults. They tried to block the contents from view as they hastily shoved handfuls of coins into a leather bag.**

"It didn't work well," said Ron. "Thanks for trying though."

**Back outside on the marble steps, they all separated. Percy muttered vaguely about needing a new quill. Fred and George had spotted their friend from Hogwarts, Lee Jordan. Mrs. Weasley and Ginny were going to a secondhand robe shop. Mr. Weasley was insisting on taking the Grangers off to the Leaky Cauldron for a drink.**

"**We'll all meet at Flourish and Blotts in an hour to buy your schoolbooks," said Mrs. Weasley, setting off with Ginny. "And not one step down Knockturn Alley!" she shouted at the twins' retreating backs.**

"It's like you don't trust them Molly," James said.

"She didn't," Riley said.

Remus furrowed his eyebrows. He noticed several times that Harry, Ron, Thomas, Hermione, and Riley used past tense words, like the person weren't like that anymore or are dead. They also had sad expressions when a certain person was mentioned. When they were asked about Dumbledore they looked as though they were lying. What were they not telling them?

**Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley strolled off along the winding, cobbled street. The bags of gold, silver, and bronze jangling cheerfully in Harry's and Riley's pockets was clamoring to be spent, so Harry bought five large strawberry-and-peanut-butter ice creams,**

Mouths watered.

**which they slurped happily as they wandered up the alley, examining the fascinating shop windows. Ron gazed longingly at a full set of Chudley Cannon robes in the windows of Quality Quidditch Supplies until Hermione dragged them off to buy ink and parchment next door. In Gambol and Japes Wizarding Joke Shop, they met Fred, George, and Lee Jordan, who were stocking up on Dr. Filibuster's Fabulous Wet-Start, No-Heat Fireworks where Riley handed them a handful of sickles and whispered "Prank ammo.",**

James and Sirius gave satisfied grins.

**and in a tiny junk shop full of broken wands, lopsided brass scales, and old cloaks covered in potion stains they found Percy, deeply immersed in a small and deeply boring book called Prefects Who Gained Power.**

"It's not boring!" yelled Remus and Lily in unison.

"**A study of Hogwarts prefects and their later careers," Ron read aloud off the back cover. "That sounds fascinating…"**

"**Go away," Percy snapped.**

"Well that was rude…" said Alice.

"**Course, he's very ambitious, Percy, he's got it all planned out… He wants to be Minister of Magic…" **

"Over my dead body," Riley muttered under her breath.

**Ron told Harry, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley in an undertone as they left Percy to it.**

**An hour later, they headed for Flourish and Blotts. They were by no means the only ones making their way to the bookshop. As they approached it, they saw to their surprise a large crowd jostling outside the doors, trying to get in. The reason for this was proclaimed by a large banner stretched across the upper windows:**

**GILDEROY LOCKHART** **will be signing copies of his autobiography**

**MAGICAL ME**

**Today 12:30 - 4:30 P.M.**

Everyone groaned. Teddy even scrunched up his face.

"**We can actually meet him!" Hermione squealed. "I mean, he's written almost the whole booklist!"**

"What did you see in _him_?" asked Ron.

"**Oh yippee," said Riley dryly. "My dream come true."**

**The crowd seemed to be made up mostly of witches around Mrs. Weasley's age. **

"Are you implying that I'm old?" asked Molly.

"The book said it!" said Riley.

**A harassed-looking wizard stood at the door, saying, "Calmly, please, ladies… Don't push, there… mind the books, now…"**

**Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley squeezed inside.**

"Why did we have go in there…" groaned Thomas.

**A long line wound right to the back of the shop, where Gilderoy Lockhart was signing his books. They each grabbed a copy of The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 2 and sneaked up the line to where the rest of the Weasleys were standing with Mr. and Mrs. Granger.**

"They did have a nice time, by the way," Hermione said to Arthur.

"**Oh, there you are, good," said Mrs. Weasley. She sounded breathless and kept patting her hair. "We'll be able to see him in a minute…"**

**Gilderoy Lockhart came slowly into view, seated at a table surrounded by large pictures of his own face, all winking and flashing dazzlingly white teeth at the crowd. The real Lockhart was wearing robes of forget-me-not blue that exactly matched his eyes; his pointed wizard's hat was set at a jaunty angle on his wavy hair.**

"I can't believe there's a whole paragraph dedicated to Lockhart," James exclaimed.

**A short, irritable-looking man was dancing around taking photographs with a large black camera that emitted puffs of purple smoke with every blinding flash.**

"**Out of the way, there," he snarled at Ron, moving back to get a better shot. "This is for the Daily Prophet —"**

"Seems like a pleasant guy," Sirius said.

"Oh yeah," Riley said, "Nicest guy ever."

**The photographer stepped on Ron's foot.**

"It really did hurt…" said Ron.

"**Oi! That was rude!" exclaimed Thomas.**

**Ron rubbed his foot where the photographer had stepped on it.**

**Gilderoy Lockhart heard Thomas. He looked up. He saw Ron and Thomas — and then he saw Harry.**

Everyone groaned.

"Why Harry?" Lily said, "Why?"

**He stared. Then he leapt to his feet and positively shouted, "It can't be Harry Potter?"**

"No, no," Thomas said, "It was just a potted plant."

**The crowd parted, whispering excitedly; Lockhart dived forward, seized Harry's arm, and pulled him to the front. **

Harry cringed at the memory.

**The crowd burst into applause. Harry's face burned as Lockhart shook his hand for the photographer, who was clicking away madly, wafting thick smoke over the Weasleys.**

"What is with this photographer?" Molly asked.

"**Nice big smile, Harry," said Lockhart, through his own gleaming teeth. "Together, you and I are worth the front page."**

Riley shook her head and said, "Harry alone is worth the front page. Trust me."

**When he finally let go of Harry's hand, Harry could hardly feel his fingers. He tried to sidle back over to the Weasleys, but Lockhart threw an arm around his shoulders and clamped him tightly to his side.**

Groans filled the room.

"**Ladies and gentlemen," he said loudly, waving for quiet. "What an extraordinary moment this is! The perfect moment for me to make a little announcement I've been sitting on for some time!**

"**When young Harry here stepped into Flourish and Blotts today, he only wanted to buy my autobiography **

"Liar!" Harry shouted.

— **which I shall be happy to present him now, free of charge —" The crowd applauded again. **

"**LET GO OF HARRY!" shouted Riley.**

"I take it he won't listen," Alice said.

"He doesn't," Molly said.

"**He had no idea," Lockhart continued, giving Harry a little shake that made his glasses slip to the end of his nose, "that he would shortly be getting much, much more than my book, Magical Me. He and his schoolmates will, in fact, be getting the real magical me. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have great pleasure and pride in announcing that this September; I will be taking up the post of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry!"**

There was silence then;

"They're letting him teach?"

"Have they gone mad?"

"What is wrong with this world?"

"I would've preferred a Cornish Pixie to teach!"

**Riley and Thomas booed quite loudly.**

Riley and Thomas shrugged and then booed.

**The crowd cheered and clapped and Harry found himself being presented with the entire works of Gilderoy Lockhart. Staggering slightly under their weight, he managed to make his way out of the limelight to the edge of the room, where Ginny was standing next to her new cauldron.**

"**You have these," Harry mumbled to her, tipping the books into the cauldron. "I'll buy my own —"**

Molly grinned at Harry and said, "Thank you."

"**Bet you loved that, didn't you, Potter?" said a voice Harry had no trouble recognizing. **

"Malfoy!" many of them said.

"Buckbeak!" Riley exclaimed.

Everyone looked at her.

"He's a hippogriff. His name is Witherwings now."

**He straightened up and found himself face-to-face with Draco Malfoy, who was wearing his usual sneer.**

"**Famous Harry Potter," said Malfoy. "Can't even go into a bookshop without making the front page."**

"**Leave him alone, he didn't want all that!" said Ginny. It was the first time she had spoken in front of Harry. She was glaring at Malfoy.**

"Go Ginny!" Sirius and James exclaimed.

"**Potter, you've got yourself a girlfriend!" drawled Malfoy. Ginny went scarlet as Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley fought their way over, both clutching stacks of Lockhart's books.**

"**Oh, it's you," said Ron, looking at Malfoy as if he were something unpleasant on the sole of his shoe. **

"Odd description…" Dakota said.

**"Bet you're surprised to see Harry here, eh?"**

"**Not as surprised as I am to see you in a shop, Weasley," retorted Malfoy. "I suppose your parents will go hungry for a month to pay for all those."**

In the room if you looked carefully you could see dozens of fists flexing in anger.

**Ron went as red as Ginny. He dropped his books into the cauldron, too, and started toward Malfoy, but Harry, Hermione, and Thomas grabbed the back of his jacket.**

"Darn it," Sirius and James said.

**Riley cheered Ron on.**

Riley and Ron high-fived.

"**Ron!" said Mr. Weasley, struggling over with Fred and George. "What are you doing? It's too crowded in here, let's go outside."**

"**Well, well, well — Arthur Weasley."**

"Well, well, well – I wander who that could be," Arthur mocked.

**It was Mr. Malfoy. He stood with his hand on Draco's shoulder, sneering in just the same way.**

"Like father, like son," Lily spat.

"**Lucius," said Mr. Weasley, nodding coldly.**

"**Busy time at the Ministry, I hear," said Mr. Malfoy. "All those raids… I hope they're paying you overtime?"**

**He reached into Ginny's cauldron and extracted, from amid the glossy Lockhart books, a very old, very battered copy of A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration.**

"**Obviously not," Mr. Malfoy said. "Dear me, what's the use of being a disgrace to the name of wizard if they don't even pay you well for it?"**

There was an uproar in the room.

"HOW DARE HE!

"THE NERVE!"

"MR. WEASLEY SHOULD BE THE DEFINATION OF WIZARD!"

"IF ANYONE IS A DISGRACE, LUCIUS IS!"

**Mr. Weasley flushed darker than either Ron or Ginny.**

"**We have a very different idea of what disgraces the name of wizard, Malfoy," he said.**

"**Clearly," said Mr. Malfoy, his pale eyes straying to Mr. and Mrs. Granger, who were watching apprehensively. "The company you keep, Weasley… and I thought your family could sink no lower."**

Hermione and Lily looked like they were going to explode. They weren't the only ones.

**There was a thud of metal as Ginny's cauldron went flying; Mr. Weasley had thrown himself at Mr. Malfoy, knocking him backward into a bookshelf. **

Everyone erupted into cheers.

**Dozens of heavy spellbooks came thundering down on all their heads; there was a yell of, "Get him, Dad!" from Fred or George; "Get him Mr. Weasley!" from Riley and Thomas; Mrs. Weasley was shrieking, "No, Arthur, no!"; the crowd stampeded backward, knocking more shelves over; "Gentlemen, please — please!" cried the assistant, and then, louder than all —**

"**Break it up, there, gents, break it up —"**

"Who's that?" Remus asked.

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley exchanged grins.

**Hagrid was wading toward them through the sea of books. In an instant he had pulled Mr. Weasley and Mr. Malfoy apart. **

An 'Aw…" of disappointment filled the room.

**Mr. Weasley had a cut lip and Mr. Malfoy had been hit in the eye by an Encyclopedia of Toadstools. He was still holding Ginny's old Transfiguration book. He thrust it at her, his eyes glittering with malice.**

"**Here, girl — take your book — it's the best your father can give you —" Pulling himself out of Hagrid's grip he beckoned to Draco and swept from the shop.**

Everyone let out sighs of relief.

"Finally the arse is gone," Sirius said.

"**Yeh should've ignored him, Arthur," said Hagrid, almost lifting Mr. Weasley off his feet as he straightened his robes. "Rotten ter the core, the whole family, everyone knows that — no Malfoy's worth listenin' ter — bad blood, that's what it is — come on now — let's get outta here."**

**The assistant looked as though he wanted to stop them leaving, but he barely came up to Hagrid's waist and seemed to think better of it. **

"Smart thinking," Molly said.

**They hurried up the street, the Grangers shaking with fright and Mrs. Weasley beside herself with fury.**

"**A fine example to set for your children… brawling in public… what Gilderoy Lockhart must've thought —"**

Everyone looked at Molly.

"Who cares what he thought," Remus said.

"**He was pleased," said Fred. "Didn't you hear him as we were leaving? He was asking that bloke from the Daily Prophet if he'd be able to work the fight into his report — said it was all publicity —"**

**But it was a subdued group that headed back to the fireside in the Leaky Cauldron, where Harry, Riley, the Weasleys, and all their shopping would be traveling back to the Burrow using Floo powder. They said good-bye to the Grangers, who were leaving the pub for the Muggle street on the other side; Mr. Weasley started to ask them how bus stops worked, but stopped quickly at the look on Mrs. Weasley's face. **

"Extremely smart thinking," Ron said.

**Then they said their good byes to Thomas who was going to Floo home after the Harry, Riley, and the Weasleys left.**

**Harry took off his glasses and put them safely in his pocket before helping himself to Floo powder. It definitely wasn't his favorite way to travel.**

"And that is the end of this chapter" Molly said handing the book to Frank.

"And an interesting one it was," Frank said.


	5. The Whomping Willow

_A/N I don't own Harry Potter._

"**Chapter Five; The Whomping Willow**," read Frank.

Remus groaned and said, "This can't be good at all."

**The end of the summer vacation came too quickly for Harry and Riley's liking. **

"It always did," sighed Harry.

**They were looking forward to getting back to Hogwarts, but their month at the Burrow had been the happiest of their lives. **

"It still is," Riley said grinning.

**Riley and the twins even started a Weasley-Potter-Black-No-Adults-Prank-War.**

"You did?" exclaimed Sirius.

"Yup," Riley responded.

"I'm so proud of you!"

**It all started when Riley woke up looking like a Weasley.**

"Which isn't a bad thing," Riley said quickly.

**The culprits had turned out to be Fred and George. To get back at them she dyed their hair hot pink. **

"Yikes," Arthur said.

**Then at breakfast Harry's breakfast exploded all over him. It turned out the plate was supposed to go to Riley courtesy of the twins. That's how Harry got involved.**

"That's my boy!" James said.

Harry grinned.

**After breakfast Harry, Riley, Ron, the twins, and Ginny (who Riley managed to convince to join them) played Quidditch during which when Ginny tried riding Ron's broom it wouldn't fly. It turned out it was just a regular broom that Harry had decorated to look like Ron's broom. After a few more days of pranking Ginny was the only one who hadn't backed out of the prank war. **

"YOU DIDN'T WIN?" James and Sirius shouted at their respective child.

Harry and Riley looked down in mock shame.

**Harry backed out when someone had smeared super sticky honey on his bed sheets,**

"It was really sticky!"

**the twins backed out when some harmless fireworks went off in their trousers,**

Arthur was pretty sure who the culprit was.

**and Riley backed out when she woke up and quickly learned her long wavy hair had been cut short (Mr. Weasley ended up magically reattaching her hair).**

"I'm still planning my revenge for that," Riley said.

**On their last evening, Mrs. Weasley conjured up a sumptuous dinner that included all of Harry and Riley's favorite things, ending with a mouthwatering treacle pudding. **

**Fred and George rounded off the evening with a display of Filibuster fireworks; they filled the kitchen with red and blue stars that bounced from ceiling to wall for at least half an hour. **

"Amusing," Remus said.

"It was," Ron said.

**Then it was time for a last mug of hot chocolate and bed.**

**It took a long while to get started next morning. **

Riley, Ron, and Harry groaned.

**They were up at dawn, but somehow they still seemed to have a great deal to do. Mrs. Weasley dashed about in a bad mood looking for spare socks and quills; people kept colliding on the stairs, half-dressed with bits of toast in their hands; people kept having to change clothes, because they had something spilt on them (mainly Fred and Riley, who repeatedly spilled ink or juice on each other);**

"You and Fred were half awake!" Ron said, "What did you expect?"

**and Mr. Weasley nearly broke his neck, tripping over a stray chicken as he crossed the yard carrying Ginny's trunk to the car.**

Arthur cringed.

**Harry and Riley couldn't see how nine people, seven large trunks, three owls, and a rat were going to fit into one small Ford Anglia. They had reckoned, of course, without the special features that Mr. Weasley had added.**

Molly glared at Arthur. Arthur sank back into his seat.

"**Not a word to Molly," **

Molly's glare deepened.

**he whispered to Harry as he opened the trunk and showed him how it had been magically expanded so that the luggage fitted easily.**

**When at last they were all in the car, Mrs. Weasley glanced into the back seat, where Harry, Ron, Fred, George, and Percy were all sitting comfortably side by side, and said, "Muggles do know more than we give them credit for, don't they?" She, Ginny, and Riley got into the front seat, which had been stretched so that it resembled a park bench. "I mean, you'd never know it was this roomy from the outside, would you?"**

"Imagine what the people driving by were thinking," Frank said.

"By golly, look at the amount of people in that car," Dakota said.

**Mr. Weasley started up the engine and they trundled out of the yard, Harry and Riley turning back for a last look at the house. **

Lily sighed and said, "Too bad you won't be there for a while."

Riley, Ron, and Harry burst into laughter.

**They barely had time to wonder when they'd see it again when they were back. **

"What?"

**George had forgotten his box of Filibuster fireworks. Five minutes after that, they skidded to a halt in the yard so that Fred could run in for his broomstick. Not even a minute after they had to come back because Riley left her wand in Ginny's room.**

"How do you forget your wand?" Thomas asked.

"I was helping Ron find his _rat_," Riley spat.

**They had almost reached the highway when Ginny shrieked that she'd left her diary. **

"All of these things could have been owled to Hogwarts," Alice said.

"No one was thinking straight," Harry said.

**By the time she had clambered back into the car, they were running very late, and tempers were running high.**

**Mr. Weasley glanced at his watch and then at his wife.**

"**Molly, dear —"**

"**No, Arthur —–"**

"**No one would see — this little button here is an Invisibility Booster I installed — that'd get us up in the air — then we fly above the clouds. We'd be there in ten minutes and no one would be any the wiser —"**

"**I said no, Arthur, not in broad daylight —"**

Riley, Ron, and Thomas were very happy he hadn't used the Invisibility Booster.

**They reached King's Cross at a quarter to eleven. Mr. Weasley dashed across the road to get trolleys for their trunks and they all hurried into the station.**

**Harry and Riley had caught the Hogwarts Express the previous year. The tricky part was getting onto platform nine and three-quarters, which wasn't visible to the Muggle eye. What you had to do was walk through the solid barrier dividing platforms nine and ten. It didn't hurt, but it had to be done carefully so that none of the Muggles noticed you vanishing.**

"**Percy first," said Mrs. Weasley, looking nervously at the clock overhead, which showed they had only five minutes to disappear casually through the barrier.**

**Percy strode briskly forward and vanished. Mr. Weasley went next; Fred and George followed.**

"**I'll take Ginny and you three come right after us," Mrs. Weasley told Harry, Ron, and Riley, grabbing Ginny's hand and setting off. In the blink of an eye they were gone.**

"**Let's go together, we've only got a minute," Ron said to Harry and Riley.**

"You'll have to sprint to make it," Lily said.

**Harry and Riley made sure that Hedwig's and Midnight's cages were safely wedged on top of their trunks and wheeled their trolley around to face the barrier. They felt perfectly confident; this wasn't nearly as uncomfortable as using Floo powder. The three of them bent low over the handles of their trolleys and walked purposefully toward the barrier, gathering speed. A few feet away from it, they broke into a run and —**

"And – and - " Frank stuttered.

"And what?" Almost everyone asked.

**CRASH.**

"Crash?"

"What happened?"

"Are you all right?"

**Harry and Ron's trolleys hit the barrier and bounced backward and Riley screeched to a halt a few inches behind them; Ron's trunk fell off with a loud thump, Harry was knocked off his feet, and Hedwig's cage bounced onto the shiny floor, and she rolled away, shrieking indignantly; **

Everyone stared at Riley, Ron, and Harry.

**people all around them stared and a guard nearby yelled, "What in blazes d'you think you're doing?"**

"**Lost control of the trolley," Harry gasped, clutching his ribs as he got up. Riley ran to pick up Hedwig, who was causing such a scene that there was a lot of muttering about cruelty to animals from the surrounding crowd.**

"It wasn't even their fault!" Dakota exclaimed.

"**Why can't we get through?" Harry hissed to Ron and Riley.**

"**I dunno —" said Ron.**

**Ron looked wildly around. A dozen curious people were still watching them.**

"**We're going to miss the train," Ron whispered. "I don't understand why the gateway's sealed itself —"**

**Harry and Riley looked up at the giant clock with a sickening feeling in the pits of their stomachs. **

"**Ten… Nine… Eight…" Riley counted down.**

"I don't think that'll help," said Remus.

"It didn't," said Riley.

**Harry wheeled his trolley forward cautiously until it was right against the barrier and pushed with all his might. The metal remained solid.**

"**Three… Two… One…"**

"**It's gone," said Ron, sounding stunned. "The train's left. What if Mum and Dad can't get back through to us? **

"There is a thing called Apparition," James said.

"Ugh, don't mention that," Hermione groaned, "Every time Riley Apparates or Disapparates, she shouts 'Apparate!' or 'Disapparate!'"

Riley gave her a toothy grin.

**Have you two got any Muggle money?"**

Riley and Harry snorted.

**Harry gave a hollow laughed. "The Dursleys haven't given us pocket money for about six years."**

"**Even then it was only enough to buy a Mars Bar," said Riley.**

**Ron pressed his ear to the cold barrier.**

"**Can't hear a thing," he said tensely, "What're we going to do? I don't know how long it'll take Mum and Dad to get back to us."**

**They looked around. People were still watching them, mainly because of Hedwig's continuing screeches.**

"Poor Hedwig," Thomas said, "She was probably scarred for life."

"**I think we'd better go and wait by the car," said Harry. "We're attracting too much atten —"**

"**Harry!" said Ron, his eyes gleaming. "The car!"**

Molly glared at Ron and said, "You better not be thinking what I'm thinking.

Ron gulped.

"**What about it?"**

"**We can fly the car to Hogwarts!"**

"RONALD!"

"**Wicked!" exclaimed Riley.**

"No! Not wicked," Dakota said.

"**But I thought —" said Harry**

"**We're stuck, right? And we've got to get to school, haven't we? And even underage wizards are allowed to use magic if it's a real emergency, section nineteen or something of the Restriction of Thingy —" said Ron.**

"An emergency is when you're being attacked, trapped somewhere, or your house is burning down," Remus said.

"Besides," Lily said, "You've got Hedwig and Midnight."

"**But your Mum and Dad…" said Harry, pushing against the barrier again in the vain hope that it would give way. "How will they get home?"**

"**They don't need the car!" said Ron impatiently. "They know how to Apparate! You know, just vanish and reappear at home! They only bother with Floo powder and the car because we're all underage and we're not allowed to Apparate yet…"**

**Harry's feeling of panic turned suddenly to excitement.**

"**Can you fly it?" **

"Molly, please scold our children," Lily said. Dakota nodded.

Riley, Ron, and Harry exchanged frightened looks.

"RILEY! RONALD! HARRY!" Molly scolded.

"**No problem," said Ron, wheeling his trolley around to face the exit. "C'mon, let's go. If we hurry we'll be able to follow the Hogwarts Express —"**

**And they marched off through the crowd of curious Muggles, out of the station and back onto the side road where the old Ford Anglia was parked.**

**Ron unlocked the cavernous trunk with a series of taps from his wand. **

**They heaved their luggage back in, put Hedwig and Midnight on the back seat, and got into the front.**

"**Check that no one's watching," said Ron, starting the ignition with another tap of his wand. Harry and Riley stuck their heads out of the window:**

"This doesn't look suspicious at all," James said.

**Traffic was rumbling along the main road ahead, but their street was empty.**

"**Okay," they said in unison.**

**Ron pressed a tiny silver button on the dashboard. The car around them vanished — and so did they. Harry could feel the seat vibrating beneath him, hear the engine, feel his hands on his knees and his glasses on his nose, but for all he could see, he had become a pair of eyeballs, floating a few feet above the ground in a dingy street full of parked cars.**

"One of the weirdest moments of my life," Harry said.

"**Let's go," said Ron's voice from his right.**

**And the ground and the dirty buildings on either side fell away, dropping out of sight as the car rose; in seconds, the whole of London lay, smoky and glittering, below them.**

**Then there was a popping noise and the car, Harry, Riley, and Ron reappeared.**

Everyone groaned.

"**Uh-oh," said Ron, jabbing at the Invisibility Booster. "It's faulty —"**

"Man, I'm glad I didn't use the Invisibility Booster," Arthur said.

**All three of them pummeled it. The car vanished. Then it flickered back again.**

"**Hold on!" Ron yelled, and he slammed his foot on the accelerator; they shot straight into the low, woolly clouds and everything turned dull and foggy.**

"I'm just surprised we didn't get whiplash," Riley said.

"**Now what?" said Harry, blinking at the solid mass of cloud pressing in on them from all sides.**

"**We need to see the train to know what direction to go in," said Ron.**

"**Dip back down again — quickly —"**

**They dropped back beneath the clouds and twisted around in their seats, squinting at the ground.**

"**I can see it!" Riley yelled. "Right ahead — there!"**

**The Hogwarts Express was streaking along below them like a scarlet snake.**

"Snake? It looked more like a moving twig to me," Ron said.

"A moving twig?" Hermione asked.

"**Due north," said Ron, checking the compass on the dashboard. "Okay, we'll just have to check on it every half hour or so — hold on —"**

**And they shot up through the clouds. A minute later, they burst out into a blaze of sunlight.**

**It was a different world. The wheels of the car skimmed the sea of fluffy cloud, the sky a bright, endless blue under the blinding white sun.**

"**All we've got to worry about now are aeroplanes," said Ron.**

**Riley snorted and said, "Airplanes Ronald, maybe you should listen to your dad more often."**

**They all looked at each other and started to laugh; for a long time, they couldn't stop.**

Thomas blinked and said, "You three are crazier than I thought."

"Thank you," the said three said.

**It was as though they had been plunged into a fabulous dream. This, thought Harry and Riley, was surely the only way to travel — past swirls and turrets of snowy cloud, in a car full of hot, bright sunlight, with a fat pack of toffees in the glove compartment, a sandwich from Riley's jeans,**

"Please tell me you guys didn't eat the sandwich," Alice said.

"Naw," Riley said, "It was corned beef."

**and the prospect of seeing Fred's and George's jealous faces when they landed smoothly and spectacularly on the sweeping lawn in front of Hogwarts castle.**

"I've got a feeling you guys didn't land so well," Remus said.

**They made regular checks on the train as they flew farther and farther north, each dip beneath the clouds showing them a different view. London was soon far behind them, replaced by neat green fields that gave way in turn to wide, purplish moors, a great city alive with cars like multicolored ants, villages with tiny toy churches.**

**Several uneventful hours later, however, Harry and Riley had to admit that some of the fun was wearing off. The toffees had made them extremely thirsty and they had nothing to drink. They and Ron had pulled off their sweaters,**

"Were they Weasley Sweaters?" Frank asked.

The three nodded.

**but Harry's T-shirt was sticking to the back of his seat and his glasses kept sliding down to the end of his sweaty nose. **

Many grimaced at the thought.

**He had stopped noticing the fantastic cloud shapes now and was thinking longingly of the train miles below, where you could buy ice-cold pumpkin juice from a trolley pushed by a plump witch. Why hadn't they been able to get onto platform nine and three-quarters?**

"That's what we are wondering," Sirius said. "Are you going to tell us?"

"The book will tell you eventually," said Hermione.

Sirius glared at the book.

"Sirius, please stop glaring at the book," said Frank, "It is making me uncomfortable."

"**Can't be much further, can it?" croaked Ron, hours later still, as the sun started to sink into their floor of cloud, staining it a deep pink. "Ready for another check on the train?"**

**It was still right below them, winding its way past a snowcapped mountain. It was much darker beneath the canopy of clouds. **

"**Still there," groaned Riley.**

"You make it sound like it is a bad thing," said Alice.

"I WAS DEHYDRATED!"

**Ron put his foot on the accelerator and drove them upward again, but as he did so, the engine began to whine.**

Molly, Lily, and Dakota looked at Ron.

"What?" he said.

"It was your idea to drive the car," Thomas told him.

**Harry, Riley, Ron exchanged nervous glances.**

"**It's probably just tired," said Ron. "It's never been this far before…"**

**And they both pretended not to notice the whining growing louder and louder as the sky became steadily darker. Stars were blossoming in the blackness. Harry and Riley pulled their sweaters back on, trying to ignore the way the windshield wipers were now waving feebly, as though in protest.**

"It was hard to ignore that," said Harry.

"**Not far," said Ron, more to the car than to Harry and Riley, "not far now," and he patted the dashboard nervously.**

"You know, that made us feel even more frightened," said Riley.

**When they flew back beneath the clouds a little while later, they had to squint through the darkness for a landmark they knew.**

"An Elephant?"

"A giant?"

"A Mexican Hat Dancer?"

"Really James, really?"

"Yes Moony, yes."

"Ignoring those two, I guess the castle!"

"**There!" Harry shouted, making Ron, Riley, Hedwig, and Midnight jump. "Straight ahead!"**

**Silhouetted on the dark horizon, high on the cliff over the lake, stood the many turrets and towers of Hogwarts castle.**

Many smiled at the beautiful description.

**But the car had begun to shudder and was losing speed.**

"**Come on," Ron said cajolingly, giving the steering wheel a little shake, "nearly there, come on —"**

**The engine groaned. Narrow jets of steam were issuing from under the hood. Harry found himself gripping the edges of his seat very hard and Riley holding onto Harry as they flew toward the lake.**

"You held onto Harry?" said Sirius.

"Well I couldn't hold on to my seat, and I wasn't going to hold onto Ron, 'cause he's Ron," explained Riley.

**The car gave a nasty wobble. Glancing out of his window, Harry saw the smooth, black, glassy surface of the water, a mile below. Ron's knuckles were white on the steering wheel. The car wobbled again.**

"**Come on," Ron muttered.**

**They were over the lake — the castle was right ahead — Ron put his foot down.**

**There was a loud clunk, a splutter, and the engine died completely.**

Everyone was silent. They exchanged looks of horror.

"**Uh-oh," said Ron, into the silence.**

"**AUGH! RON DOOMED US!" screamed Riley as they fell.**

"It was really scary."

**The nose of the car dropped. They were falling, gathering speed, heading straight for the solid castle wall.**

"**Noooooo!" Ron yelled, swinging the steering wheel around; they missed the dark stone wall by inches as the car turned in a great arc, soaring over the dark greenhouses, then the vegetable patch, and then out over the black lawns, losing altitude all the time.**

Most of the parents of the future children groaned and covered their faces.

**Ron let go of the steering wheel completely and pulled his wand out of his back pocket —**

"**STOP! STOP!" he yelled, whacking the dashboard and the windshield, but they were still plummeting, the ground flying up toward them —**

"That won't work Ronald!" exclaimed Molly.

"**THAT WON'T WORK RONALD!" shouted Riley.**

Molly blinked.

"**WATCH OUT FOR THAT TREE!" Harry bellowed, lunging for the steering wheel, but too late —**

**CRUNCH.**

Everyone cringed.

**With an earsplitting bang of metal on wood, they hit the thick tree trunk and dropped to the ground with a heavy jolt. Steam was billowing from under the crumpled hood; Hedwig and Midnight were shrieking in terror; a golfball-size lump was throbbing on Harry's head where he had hit the windshield; to his right, Ron let out a low, despairing groan; and behind him Riley had somehow ended up in the backseat with the owls.**

"You weren't wearing a seatbelt?" Lily asked.

"I was," Riley told her.

"Then how?"

"The seatbelt wasn't tight enough."

"**Are you okay?" Harry said urgently.**

"**My wand," said Ron, in a shaky voice. "Look at my wand —"**

**It had snapped, almost in two; the tip was dangling limply, held on by a few splinters.**

"On the bright side it wasn't one of you," said Dakota.

"**On the bright side it wasn't one of us," said Riley sitting herself upright in the seat.**

"Stop that Riley!"

"Mom, you guys are the ones saying what I'm saying."

**Harry opened his mouth to say he was sure they'd be able to mend it up at the school, but he never even got started. **

**At that very moment, something hit his side of the car with the force of a charging bull, sending him lurching sideways into Ron, just as an equally heavy blow hit the roof.**

Remus groaned and said, "If it weren't for me, that tree wouldn't be there."

"Don't be so hard on yourself, dad," said Thomas comfortingly. "They're okay, see?"

Ron, Riley, and Harry waved at Remus.

"**What's happen —?"**

**Ron gasped, staring through the windshield, and Harry looked around just in time to see a branch as thick as a python smash into it. Riley screamed. **

"It almost makes you sound girly."

"Well in my defense, the guys were screaming much louder."

"HEY!" shouted Harry.

"You promised you wouldn't tell!" exclaimed Ron.

Everyone minus Harry and Ron were rolling on the floor, laughing.

**The tree they had hit was attacking them. Its trunk was bent almost double, and its gnarled boughs were pummeling every inch of the car it could reach.**

"**Aaargh!" said Ron as another twisted limb punched a large dent into his door;**

"My poor car," Arthur whimpered.

**the windshield was now trembling under a hail of blows from knuckle-like twigs and a branch as thick as a battering ram was pounding furiously on the roof, which seemed to be caving in.**

"**Run for it!" Ron shouted, throwing his full weight against his door, but next second he had been knocked backward into Harry's lap by a vicious uppercut from another branch.**

There were a few snorts of laughter.

"**We're done for!" he moaned as the ceiling sagged, but suddenly the floor of the car was vibrating — the engine had restarted.**

"**When we die, Ron," Riley shouted at Ron. "I'll make sure St. Peter doesn't let you through the gates into Heaven!"**

"Harsh," Lily said.

"**Reverse!" Harry yelled, and the car shot backward; the tree was still trying to hit them; they could hear its roots creaking as it almost ripped itself up, lashing out at them as they sped out of reach.**

"**That," panted Ron, "was close. Well done, car —"**

**The car, however, had reached the end of its tether. With two sharp clunks, the doors flew open and Harry and Riley felt their seats tip sideways:**

"Now that is one weird car," Dakota said.

"Mental note to self, do not enchant car," Arthur said.

**Next thing Harry knew he was sprawled on the damp ground. Riley landed on her bottom. Loud thuds told him that the car was ejecting their luggage from the trunk; Hedwig's and Midnight's cages flew through the air and burst open; they rose out of it with an angry screech and sped off toward the castle without a backward look. Then, dented, scratched, and steaming, the car rumbled off into the darkness, its rear lights blazing angrily.**

"**Come back!" Ron yelled after it, brandishing his broken wand. "Dad'll kill me!"**

"Well Arthur probably shouldn't have had the car in the first place," said Molly.

**But the car disappeared from view with one last snort from its exhaust.**

"**Can you believe our luck?" said Ron miserably, bending down to pick up Scabbers. "Of all the trees we could've hit, we had to get one that hits back."**

"**Stupid karma!" shouted Riley.**

"That's what you get for illegally driving an illegal car to Hogwarts," said James.

**Ron glanced over his shoulder at the ancient tree, which was still flailing its branches threateningly.**

"**Come on," said Harry wearily, "we'd better get up to the school…"**

**It wasn't at all the triumphant arrival they had pictured. Stiff, cold, and bruised, they seized the ends of their trunks and began dragging them up the grassy slope, toward the great oak front doors.**

"**I think the feast's already started," said Ron, dropping his trunk at the foot of the front steps and crossing quietly to look through a brightly lit window. "Hey — Harry - Riley — come and look — it's the Sorting!"**

"That sorting was the only one I had ever missed, not including seventh year," said Riley.

**Harry and Riley hurried over and, together, they and Ron peered in at the Great Hall.**

**Innumerable candles were hovering in midair over four long, crowded tables, making the golden plates and goblets sparkle. Overhead, the bewitched ceiling, which always mirrored the sky outside, sparkled with stars.**

**Through the forest of pointed black Hogwarts hats, Harry and Riley saw a long line of scared-looking first years filing into the Hall. Ginny was among them, easily visible because of her vivid Weasley hair. **

The three Weasley's cheered.

**Meanwhile, Professor McGonagall, a bespectacled witch with her hair in a tight bun, was placing the famous Hogwarts Sorting Hat on a stool before the newcomers.**

**Every year, this aged old hat, patched, frayed, and dirty, sorted new students into the four Hogwarts houses **

"Yet no one has ever gotten lice from it," said Frank, scratching his head.

**(Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin). Harry well remembered putting it on, exactly one year ago, and waiting, petrified, for its decision as it muttered aloud in his ear. For a few horrible seconds he had feared that the hat was going to put him in Slytherin, the house that had turned out more Dark witches and wizards than any other but he had ended up in Gryffindor, along with Ron, Hermione, Thomas, Riley and the rest of the Weasleys. **

Everyone cheered.

**Last term, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley had helped Gryffindor win the House Championship, beating Slytherin for the first time in seven years.**

Everyone cheered… again

**A very small, mousy-haired boy had been called forward to place the hat on his head.**

The future generation grinned.

"Colin Creevey," they said in unison.

**Harry's eyes wandered past him to where Professor Dumbledore, the headmaster, sat watching the Sorting from the staff table, his long silver beard and half-moon glasses shining brightly in the candlelight. Several seats along, Harry and Riley saw Gilderoy Lockhart, dressed in robes of aquamarine. **

"What colour is that?" Sirius asked.

"A greenish blue color" Lily told him.

**And there at the end was Hagrid, huge and hairy, drinking deeply from his goblet.**

"**Hang on…" Harry muttered to Ron. "There's an empty chair at the staff table… Where's Snape?"**

**Professor Severus Snape was Harry's least favorite teacher. **

**Harry and Riley also happened to be Snape's least favorite students.**

"I was his best student!" Riley exclaimed. "In fifth year, he put me in his sixth year potions class! Teachers usually favour their best student!"

"There, there," said James.

**Cruel, sarcastic, and disliked by everybody except the students from his own house (Slytherin), Snape taught Potions.**

"**Maybe he's ill!" said Ron hopefully.**

"**Maybe he's left," said Harry, "because he missed out on the Defense Against Dark Arts job again!"**

**Riley's eyes widened and she tried getting her friends attention.**

"Snape's there, isn't he?" Dakota asked.

"**Harry! Ronald!"**

"**Or he might have been sacked!" said Ron enthusiastically. "I mean, everyone hates him —"**

"**Or maybe," said a very cold voice right behind them, "he's waiting to hear why you three didn't arrive on the school train."**

**Harry spun around. There, his black robes rippling in a cold breeze, stood Severus Snape. He was a thin man with sallow skin, a hooked nose, and greasy, shoulder-length black hair, and at this moment, he was smiling in a way that told Harry he, Ron, and Riley were in very deep trouble.**

"The only reason he would smile," said Thomas.

"**Follow me," said Snape.**

**Not daring even to look at each other, Harry, Ron, and Riley followed Snape up the steps into the vast, echoing entrance hall, which was lit with flaming torches. A delicious smell of food was wafting from the Great Hall, but Snape led them away from the warmth and light, down a narrow stone staircase that led into the dungeons.**

Almost everyone shivered.

"**In!" he said, opening a door halfway down the cold passageway and pointing.**

**They entered Snape's office, shivering. The shadowy walls were lined with shelves of large glass jars, in which floated all manner of revolting things Harry didn't really want to know the name of at the moment, Riley had already named half of them in her head. **

"One the few talents I have."

**The fireplace was dark and empty. Snape closed the door and turned to look at them.**

"**So," he said softly, "the train isn't good enough for the famous Harry Potter** **and his faithful sidekicks Weasley and Black.**

"WE ARE'T SIDEKICKS!" Riley and Ron shouted.

**Wanted to arrive with a bang, did we, boys?"**

"Why do the professors keep calling Riley a boy?" asked Riley.

"**And girl," said Riley while fake coughing.**

"**No, sir, it was the barrier at King's Cross, it —"**

"**Silence!" said Snape coldly. "What have you done with the car?" Ron gulped. **

"Speaking of the car," said Thomas, "I'm glad to inform everyone that the car is living the forest behind Hogwarts. The car is now a wild creature living in the forest."

"Yes kids of the generation to come will be told the story of the Ford Anglia in the forest," said Ron.

Riley stood up and said, "I am Riley Black, and I approve this message."

**This wasn't the first time Snape had given Harry and Riley the impression of being able to read minds. But a moment later, he understood, as Snape unrolled today's issue of the Evening Prophet. "You were seen," he hissed, showing them the headline: FLYING FORD ANGLIA MYSTIFIES MUGGLES. He began to read aloud: "Two Muggles in London, convinced they saw an old car flying over the Post Office tower… at noon in Norfolk, Mrs. Hetty Bayliss, while hanging out her washing… Mr. Angus Fleet, of Peebles, reported to police… Six or seven Muggles in all.**

"That's more than I thought," Hermione said.

**I believe your father works in the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office?" he said, looking up at Ron and smiling still more nastily. "Dear, dear… his own son…"**

**Harry and Riley felt as though they'd just been walloped in the stomach by one of the mad tree's larger branches. If anyone found out Mr. Weasley had bewitched the car… they hadn't thought of that…**

"**I noticed, in my search of the park, that considerable damage seems to have been done to a very valuable Whomping Willow," Snape went on.**

"**That tree did more damage to us than we —" Ron blurted out.**

"It's true," Harry said.

"**We got the cuts, bruises, and possible broken ribs to prove it!" argued Riley.**

"That was also true.

"**Silence!" snapped Snape again. "Most unfortunately, you are not in my House and the decision to expel you does not rest with me. **

"But he wouldn't expel you if you were Slytherins," Arthur said.

**I shall go and fetch the people who do have that happy power. You will wait here."**

**Harry, Ron, and Riley stared at each other, white-faced. Harry didn't feel hungry any more. He now felt extremely sick. He tried not to look at a large, slimy something suspended in green liquid on a shelf behind Snape's desk. If Snape had gone to fetch Professor McGonagall, head of Gryffindor House, they were hardly any better off. She might be fairer than Snape, but she was still extremely strict.**

"So true," everyone said.

**Ten minutes later, Snape returned, and sure enough it was Professor McGonagall who accompanied him. Harry had seen Professor McGonagall angry on several occasions, Riley multiple occasions, but either they had forgotten just how thin her mouth could go, or they had never seen her this angry before. **

"I think it was anger," Riley said.

**She raised her wand the moment she entered; Harry, Ron, and Riley all flinched, but she merely pointed it at the empty fireplace, where flames suddenly erupted.**

"Hogwarts doesn't do physical punishments," said Dakota, shaking her head.

"**Sit," she said, and they all backed into chairs by the fire.**

"**Explain," she said, her glasses glinting ominously.**

**Ron launched into the story, starting with the barrier at the station refusing to let them through.**

"— **so we had no choice, Professor, we couldn't get on the train."**

"**Why didn't you send us a letter by owl? I believe you two have an owl?" Professor McGonagall said coldly to Harry and Riley.**

Harry and Riley clapped their hands to their forehead.

**Harry and Riley gaped at her. Now she said it, that seemed the obvious thing to have done.**

"**I — I didn't think —"**

"**That," said Professor McGonagall, "is obvious."**

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"**We aren't the smartest people in world," said Riley. "Nowhere near it."**

**There was a knock on the office door and Snape, now looking happier than ever, opened it. **

**There stood the headmaster, Professor Dumbledore. Harry's and Riley's whole bodies went numb. Dumbledore was looking unusually grave. He stared down his very crooked nose at them, and Harry and Riley suddenly found themself wishing they and Ron were still being beaten up by the Whomping Willow.**

"The look he gave us," Ron said, "made us feel really depressed. It's a look you never would want to see."

**There was a long silence. Then Dumbledore said, "Please explain why you did this."**

**It would have been better if he had shouted. **

**Harry hated the disappointment in his voice. For some reason, he was unable to look Dumbledore in the eyes, and spoke instead to his knees. He told Dumbledore everything except that Mr. Weasley owned the bewitched car, making it sound as though he and Ron had happened to find a flying car parked outside the station. **

"Highly unbelievable," Hermione said crossly, "He probably knew it was Arthur's."

**He knew Dumbledore would see through this at once, but Dumbledore asked no questions about the car. When Harry had finished, he merely continued to peer at them through his spectacles.**

"**We'll go and get our stuff," said Ron in a hopeless sort of voice.**

"Don't jump to conclusions like that," Remus said.

"**What are you talking about, Weasley?" barked Professor McGonagall.**

"**Well, you're expelling us, aren't you?" said Riley.**

"Don't word it either."

**Harry looked quickly at Dumbledore.**

"**Not today, Mr. Weasley, Miss Black," said Dumbledore. "But I must impress upon both of you the seriousness of what you have done. I will be writing to your families tonight. I must also warn you that if you do anything like this again, I will have no choice but to expel you."**

**Snape looked as though Christmas had been canceled. **

"He actually looked constipated," Ron said.

**He cleared his throat and said, "Professor Dumbledore, these boys and girl have flouted the Decree for the Restriction of Underage Wizardry, caused serious damage to an old and valuable tree — surely acts of this nature —"**

"**It will be for Professor McGonagall to decide on these children's punishments, Severus," said Dumbledore calmly. "They are in her House and are therefore her responsibility." He turned to Professor McGonagall. "I must go back to the feast, Minerva, I've got to give out a few notices. **

"I bet one of those notices were that students may not fly cars to school," said Sirius.

**Come, Severus, there's a delicious-looking custard tart I want to sample —"**

**Snape shot a look of pure venom at Harry, Ron, and Riley as he allowed himself to be swept out of his office, leaving them alone with Professor McGonagall, who was still eyeing them like a wrathful eagle.**

"Psh, she does that to everyone," said James.

"**You'd better get along to the hospital wing, Weasley, you're bleeding."**

"**Not much," said Ron, hastily wiping the cut over his eye with his sleeve. "Professor, I wanted to watch my sister being Sorted —"**

"**The Sorting Ceremony is over," said Professor McGonagall. "Your sister is also in Gryffindor."**

"Well that wasn't really surprising," said Frank.

"**Oh, good," said Ron.**

"**And speaking of Gryffindor —" Professor McGonagall said sharply, but Harry cut in:**

Everyone gasped except for Harry, Ron, and Riley.

**"Professor, when we took the car, term hadn't started, so — so Gryffindor shouldn't really have points taken from it — should it?" he finished, watching her anxiously.**

**Professor McGonagall gave him a piercing look, but he was sure she had almost smiled. Her mouth looked less thin, anyway.**

"**I will not take any points from Gryffindor,"**

The past grinned.

**she said, and Harry's heart lightened considerably. "But you three will get a detention." **

**It was better than Harry and Riley had expected. As for Dumbledore's writing to the Dursleys, that was nothing. They knew perfectly well they'd just be disappointed that the Whomping Willow hadn't squashed them flat.**

"All there was to worry about was Ron," Riley said, "For he, he got the worst of it."

**Professor McGonagall raised her wand again and pointed it at Snape's desk. A large plate of sandwiches, three silver goblets, and a jug of iced pumpkin juice appeared with a pop.**

"No dessert?" Thomas asked.

"Misbehaving children do not deserve dessert," James said.

"Said one of the four Marauders."

"**You will eat in here and then go straight up to your dormitory," she said. "I must also return to the feast."**

**When the door had closed behind her, Ron let out a long, low whistle.**

"**I thought we'd had it," he said, grabbing a sandwich.**

"**So did I," said Harry, taking one, too.**

**Riley snatched two sandwiches and stuffed them in her mouth and said,**

"Aw… you have my appetite and metabolism," cooed Sirius.

"**Me too."**

"**Can you believe our luck, though?" said Ron thickly through a mouthful of chicken and ham. "Fred and George must've flown that car five or six times and no Muggle ever saw them." **

Molly made mental not to remember this.

**He swallowed and took another huge bite. "Why couldn't we get through the barrier?"**

**Harry shrugged. "We'll have to watch our step from now on, though," he said, taking a grateful swig of pumpkin juice. "Wish we could've gone up to the feast…"**

Ron and Riley nodded, both upset, even though this happened nearly six years ago, that they had to miss they food they serve at the feasts.

"**She didn't want us showing off," said Ron sagely. "Doesn't want people to think it's clever, arriving by flying car."**

"**Looks like I have something to add to Thomas and I's list of stupid things to do at Hogwarts." said Riley grinning.**

"What's – "

Frank put a hand and said, "Don't even ask."

"**What's number one?" said Harry.**

"**Never, ever look McGonagall straight in the eye," said Riley with a shudder.**

"Indeed," Sirius said with a shudder too.

**When they had eaten as many sandwiches as they could (the plate kept refilling itself) they rose and left the office, treading the familiar path to Gryffindor Tower. The castle was quiet; it seemed that the feast was over. They walked past muttering portraits and creaking suits of armor, and climbed narrow flights of stone stairs, until at last they reached the passage where the secret entrance to Gryffindor Tower was hidden, behind an oil painting of a very fat woman in a pink silk dress.**

"**Password?" she said as they approached.**

"Oh no, no one told you the password," Lily said.

"**Er —" said Harry.**

**They didn't know the new year's password, not having met a Gryffindor prefect yet, but help came almost immediately; they heard hurrying feet behind them and turned to see Hermione and Thomas dashing toward them.**

Everyone cheered.

"**There you are! Where have you been? The most ridiculous rumors — someone said you'd been expelled for crashing a flying car!" said Thomas.**

"Ridiculous, yet mostly true," Arthur said.

"**Well, we haven't been expelled," Harry assured him.**

"**You're not telling us you did fly here?" said Hermione, sounding almost as severe as Professor McGonagall.**

"**Skip the lecture," said Ron impatiently, "and tell us the new password."**

"She may have skipped the lecture for you boys, but she gave me a super long lecture," Riley said.

"**It's 'wattlebird,'" said Hermione impatiently, "but that's not the point —"**

**Her words were cut short, however, as the portrait of the fat lady swung open and there was a sudden storm of clapping. It looked as though the whole of Gryffindor House was still awake, packed into the circular common room, standing on the lopsided tables and squashy armchairs, waiting for them to arrive. **

"They're going to congratulate you guys?" exclaimed Molly.

**Arms reached through the portrait hole to pull Harry, Ron, and Riley inside, leaving Hermione and Thomas to scramble in after them.**

"**Brilliant!" yelled Lee Jordan. "Inspired! What an entrance! Flying a car right into the Whomping Willow, people'll be talking about that one for years —"**

"The still are," Harry said.

One Riley's first day at her internship at St. Mungo's, Dean Thomas, who also happened to be an intern, brought up the story loudly in the staffroom. People still brought it at Harry and Ron's work up at least once a week.

"**Good for you," said a fifth year Harry and Riley had never spoken to; someone was patting them on the back as though they'd just won a marathon; Fred and George pushed their way to the front of the crowd and said together, "Why couldn't we've come in the car, eh?"**

"Because the twins could get through the barrier," Alice said.

**Ron was scarlet in the face, grinning embarrassedly, but Harry and Riley could see one person who didn't look happy at all. Percy was visible over the heads of some excited first years, and he seemed to be trying to get near enough to start telling them off.**

"Reminded be a bit of Jaws," Riley said, as she began to hum the Jaws theme.

**Harry nudged Ron in the ribs and nodded in Percy's direction. Ron got the point at once.**

"**Got to get upstairs — bit tired," he said, and the two of them started pushing their way toward the door on the other side of the room, which led to a spiral staircase and the dormitories Thomas quickly following muttering things.**

"Things of annoyance and stupidity," Thomas said.

"'**Night," Harry called back to Hermione and Riley, Hermione who was wearing a scowl just like Percy's.**

"**HARRY! COME BACK! SHE'LL LECTURE ME TO DEATH!" shouted Riley get a glare from Hermione.**

"I can't believe you left her with Hermione," Sirius said.

**Harry and Ron managed to get to the other side of the common room, still having their backs slapped, and gained the peace of the staircase. They hurried up it Thomas behind them, right to the top, and at last reached the door of their old dormitory, which now had a sign on it saying SECOND YEARS. They entered the familiar, circular room, with its six four-posters hung with red velvet and its high, narrow windows. Their trunks had been brought up for them and stood at the ends of their beds.**

**Ron grinned guiltily at Harry.**

"**I know I shouldn't've enjoyed that or anything, but…"**

"But what?" everyone asked minus Harry, Ron, and Thomas.

**The dormitory door flew open and in came the other second year Gryffindor boys, Seamus Finnigan, Dean Thomas, and Neville Longbottom.**

"**Unbelievable!" beamed Seamus.**

"**Cool," said Dean.**

"**Amazing," said Neville, awestruck.**

**Harry couldn't help it. He grinned, too. **

"And that is the end of this chapter," Frank said, handing the book to Alice.

_A/N Sorry it took so long, I had this chapter on my thumb drive, which I lost for like three weeks. I lose a lot of things… then find them somewhere totally unexpected. Anyway, just wondering, would you to see anymore characters read the story with everyone else (Neville, Dumbledore, Snape… etc.). Bye._


	6. Gilderoy Lockhart

"**Chapter Six; Gilderoy Lockhart**," read Alice.

"Not a chapter named after him…" James groaned.

**The next day, however, Harry barely grinned once. **

"How can one not grin?" Frank asked.

"It was a very bad day," Harry told him.

**Things started to go downhill from breakfast in the Great Hall. The four long house tables were laden with tureens of porridge, plates of kippers, mountains of toast, and dishes of eggs and bacon, beneath the enchanted ceiling (today, a dull, cloudy gray). Harry, Ron, and Thomas sat down at the Gryffindor table next to Riley and Hermione, Hermione who had her copy of Voyages with Vampires propped open against a milk jug. There was a slight stiffness in the way she said "Morning," which told Harry that she was still disapproving of the way he, Ron, and Riley had arrived. **

"Because you guys could have gotten really hurt," Hermione said.

"That is understandable," Harry said.

"Looking back," Riley said, "flying to Hogwarts was not our finest moment."

**Riley who had been reading her copy of Wanderings with Werewolves**

"Wanderings with Werewolves?" Remus asked.

"I wanted to see what lies he put in their about werewolves," Riley told him.

**nervously looked up at Thomas and Hermione. Hermione had spent an hour and a half lecturing her about how she, Harry, and Ron flying to school in a flying car was dangerous and stupid. She wasn't sure if she'd get a lecture from Thomas because he had seemed ticked off at them, especially at Riley.**

"I was really worried about you Rye," Thomas said. He remembered all the 'What if?' situations he had thought could have happened to Riley, Harry, and Ron.

**Neville Longbottom, on the other hand, greeted them cheerfully. Neville was a round-faced and accident-prone boy with the worst memory of anyone Harry and Riley had ever met.**

"Still is," Harry muttered.

"**Post's due any minute — I think Gran's sending a few things I forgot."**

**Thomas snorted and handed Neville his wand.**

"Every year," Thomas said shaking his head.

**Harry had only just started his porridge when, sure enough, there was a rushing sound overhead and a hundred or so owls streamed in, circling the hall and dropping letters and packages into the chattering crowd. A big, lumpy package bounced off Neville's head**

"Aw, my poor baby," Alice said.

**and, a second later, something large and gray fell into Hermione's jug, spraying them all with milk and feathers.**

"**Errol!" said Ron, pulling the bedraggled owl out by the feet. Errol slumped, Unconscious, onto the table, his legs in the air and a damp red envelope in his beak.**

"A Howler," everyone groaned.

"**Oh, no —" Ron gasped.**

"**It's all right, he's still alive," said Hermione, prodding Errol gently with the tip of her finger.**

"**It's not that — it's that."**

**Ron was pointing at the red envelope. It looked quite ordinary to Harry, but Ron, Thomas, and Neville were both looking at it as though they expected it to explode.**

"Because it will," Sirius said.

"**What's the matter?" said Harry.**

"**She's — she's sent me a Howler," said Ron faintly.**

"**You'd better open it, Ron," said Neville in a timid whisper. "It'll be worse if you don't. My gran sent me one once, and I ignored it and" — he gulped —"it was horrible."**

**Thomas quickly went under the table. Riley followed him.**

"It was really awkward under that table," Riley said, "we didn't speak, or anything.

**Harry looked from their petrified faces to the red envelope.**

"**What's a Howler?" he said.**

"The worst thing someone can send you," Dakota groaned.

She remembered when she got her first Howler. Sirius was annoying her, and so she hexed. Apparently McGonagall had seen the whole thing, and gave her a detention and wrote home to her parents.

**But Ron's whole attention was fixed on the letter, which had begun to smoke at the corners.**

"**Open it," Neville urged. "It'll all be over in a few minutes —"**

"Remember kids, Neville is a professional" James joked.

**Ron stretched out a shaking hand, eased the envelope from Errol's beak, and slit it open. Neville stuffed his fingers in his ears. A split second later, Harry knew why. He thought for a moment it had exploded; a roar of sound filled the huge hall, shaking dust from the ceiling.**

"My, Molly you are quite loud to be able to shake dust off the ceiling," Lily said.

"—**STEALING THE CAR, I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SURPRISED IF THEY'D EXPELLED YOU, YOU WAIT TILL I GET HOLD OF YOU, I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU STOPPED TO THINK WHAT YOUR FATHER AND I WENT THROUGH WHEN WE SAW IT WAS GONE —"**

"No, no I did not," Ron admitted.

**Mrs. Weasleys yells, a hundred times louder than usual, made the plates and spoons rattle on the table, and echoed deafeningly off the stone walls. People throughout the hall were swiveling around to see who had received the Howler, and Ron sank so low in his chair that only his crimson forehead could be seen.**

"Well that's not noticeable at all."

"Not one bit."

"That doesn't draw attention at all."

"WILL THE LOT OF YOU PLEASE SHUT UP!"

"—**LETTER FROM DUMBLEDORE LAST NIGHT, I THOUGHT YOUR FATHER WOULD DIE OF SHAME, WE DIDN'T BRING YOU UP TO BEHAVE LIKE THIS, YOU, HARRY, AND RILEY COULD HAVE ALL DIED —"**

"We still feel guilty to this day," Harry said.

"It's okay," said Arthur.

**Harry and Riley had been wondering when their names were going to crop up. Harry tried very hard to look as though he couldn't hear the voice that was making his eardrums throb.**

"Sorry," Molly mumbled, embarrassed.

"—**ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED — YOUR FATHER'S FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK, IT'S ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT AND IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE WE'LL BRING YOU STRAIGHT BACK HOME."**

"Harsh," some said.

**A ringing silence fell. The red envelope, which had dropped from Ron's hand, burst into flames and curled into ashes. Harry and Ron sat stunned, as though a tidal wave had just passed over them. Riley and Thomas popped out from under the table. A few people laughed and, gradually, a babble of talk broke out again.**

**Harry pushed his porridge away. He and Riley's insides were burning with guilt. Mr. Weasley was facing an inquiry at work. After all Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had done for them over the summer…**

Harry and Riley sighed.

**Hermione closed Voyages with Vampires and looked down at the top of Ron's head.**

"**Well, I don't know what you expected, Ron, but you —"**

"**Don't tell me I deserved it," snapped Ron.**

"Don't snap at her!" Molly exclaimed.

"**Don't snap at her!" snapped Thomas. "Actions have consequences!"**

"Yes they do," Remus agreed.

"**Calm down guys!" said Riley.**

"**I'm not surprised you're not taking this seriously," said Thomas crossly.**

"You never say that to some relatively similar to Sirius," James said, shaking his head, "They get all upset."

**Riley glared at him, hurt.**

"See?"

"**What did she do wrong?" snapped Ron.**

"Sometimes, I glad I've got Ron's my friend," Riley said, "He's always on my side."

"Coming from you," Ron said to her, "that means a lot."

"**Same thing as you did!" said Hermione hotly.**

"**ALL OF YOU JUST SHUT UP!" shouted Riley.**

**Harry, Ron, Thomas, and Hermione looked at Riley bug-eyed.**

"That happens when a Black explodes," Remus said.

**Riley sighed and gathered her stuff and went to sit with Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan on the far end of the table. She didn't really know them, but everybody was tense and Dean and Seamus seemed quite happy at the moment.**

"Deans the tall one and Seamus is the Irish one, right?" Arthur asked.

Hermione nodded.

"**Hello," she said sitting next to Seamus.**

"**Yeh've got a pair of lungs there," said Seamus to her.**

"**We heard you from here," said Dean. "And probably the whole school heard you too."**

Riley pinched the bridge of her nose, that definitely wasn't her finest moment.

"**I shouldn't have yelled at them," said Riley. "But they kept snapping at me and Ronald."**

"**Wow," said Seamus. "Can't they just forgive and forget?"**

**Riley shook her head.**

"**Not even Thomas?"**

Riley's and Thomas's face went red.

"Everyone knew Thomas and Riley were the best of friends with Thomas," Hermione told everyone, "No one was really surprised when they started dating.

"Dating?" Sirius and Remus asked hoarsely.

"I knew it!" Dakota exclaimed, punching the air, "How long? Are you engaged?"

"We've been together for over three and a half years," Thomas said.

"But we aren't engaged," Riley said quietly.

"Dating? Did you even ask for my permission," Sirius asked.

"Sirius, you're in prison," Remus reminded him.

"Actually, I did ask."

"Huh?" the past people asked.

"That's all I'm saying."

"**I dunno," Riley muttered. "I'm not very happy at him."**

"**It would suck if he doesn't," said Dean. "You guys are like super close like… Lavender and Pavarti and…"**

"**And you two?" said Riley.**

"**I guess so."**

"They've been close since they met," Riley said, "That's why I'm not surprised they're - " she clapped her hand over her mouth, "Oh, I promised I wouldn't say anything."

**Riley began to reach for the box of Lucky Charms when Seamus took it and poured it into his bowl.**

**Riley gasped and shouted, "Oi! You stole me Lucky Charms!"**

All the muggle-raised snickered at this.

**Dean found this very amusing and started snickering. Seamus didn't find it as funny.**

"**Very funny," he said sarcastically.**

"I guess Seamus doesn't find Irish-bashing jokes funny at all," Arthur said.

**Professor McGonagall was moving along the Gryffindor table, handing out course schedules. Harry took his and saw that they had double Herbology with the Hufflepuffs first.**

**Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Thomas left the castle together (Riley walked with Dean and Seamus), crossed the vegetable patch, and made for the greenhouses, where the magical plants were kept. At least the Howler had done one good thing:** **Hermione and Thomas seemed to think they had now been punished enough and were being perfectly friendly again.**

"Howlers can change lives," Alice said.

**As they neared the greenhouses they saw the rest of the class standing outside, waiting for Professor Sprout. Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, Riley, Dean, and Seamus had only just joined them when she came striding into view across the lawn, accompanied by Gilderoy Lockhart. Professor Sprout's arms were full of bandages, and with another twinge of guilt, Harry and Riley spotted the Whomping Willow in the distance, several of its branches now in slings.**

"The poor tree," James said.

Teddy who had awaken from a nap said, "Tree has owies."

Everyone couldn't help but chuckle.

**Professor Sprout was a squat little witch who wore a patched hat over her flyaway hair; there was usually a large amount of earth on her clothes and her fingernails would have made Aunt Petunia faint. Gilderoy Lockhart, however, was immaculate in sweeping robes of turquoise, **

"Why does this git have such colourful robes!" Lily exclaimed.

**his golden hair shining under a perfectly positioned turquoise hat with gold trimming.**

"**Oh, hello there!" he called, beaming around at the assembled students. "Just been showing Professor Sprout the right way to doctor a Whomping Willow! But I don't want you running away with the idea that I'm better at Herbology than she is! I just happen to have met several of these exotic plants on my travels…"**

Everyone either rolled their eyes or snorted. Even Teddy scrunched up his face.

"**Greenhouse three today, chaps!" said Professor Sprout, who was looking distinctly disgruntled, not at all her usual cheerful self.**

"Lockhart does that to you," Ron said.

**There was a murmur of interest. They had only ever worked in greenhouse one before — greenhouse three housed far more interesting and dangerous plants. Professor Sprout took a large key from her belt and unlocked the door. Harry caught a whiff of damp earth and fertilizer mingling with the heavy perfume of some giant, umbrella-sized flowers dangling from the ceiling. He was about to follow everyone inside when Lockhart's hand shot out.**

Sighs filled the room.

"**Harry! I've been wanting a word — you don't mind if he's a couple of minutes late, do you, Professor Sprout?"**

**Judging by Professor Sprout's scowl, she did mind, but Lockhart said, "That's the ticket," and closed the greenhouse door in her face.**

"How rude!" Molly exclaimed.

"**Harry," said Lockhart, his large white teeth gleaming in the sunlight as he shook his head. "Harry, Harry, Harry."**

**Completely nonplussed, Harry said nothing.**

"**When I heard — well, of course, it was all my fault. Could have kicked myself."**

"I wish you did," Riley muttered.

**Harry had no idea what he was talking about. He was about to say so when Lockhart went on, "Don't know when I've been more shocked. Flying a car to Hogwarts! Well, of course, I knew at once why you'd done it. Stood out a mile. Harry, Harry, Harry."**

**It was remarkable how he could show every one of those brilliant teeth even when he wasn't talking.**

"**Gave you a taste for publicity, didn't I?" **

"No, no you did not," Harry said.

**said Lockhart. "Gave you the bug. You got onto the front page of the paper with me and you couldn't wait to do it again."**

"I didn't want to be on the front cover."

"**Oh, no, Professor, see —"**

"**Harry, Harry, Harry," said Lockhart, reaching out and grasping his shoulder. "I understand. Natural to want a bit more once you've had that first taste — and I blame myself for giving you that, because it was bound to go to your head — but see here, young man, you can't start flying cars to try and get yourself noticed. Just calm down, all right? Plenty of time for all that when you're older. Yes, yes, I know what you're thinking! 'It's all right for him; he's an internationally famous wizard already!' But when I was twelve, I was just as much of a nobody as you are now.**

"Harry was the most popular kid at Hogwarts!" Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley yelled.

**In fact, I'd say I was even more of a nobody! I mean, a few people have heard of you, haven't they? **

"Everyone has!"

"He's the most famous person of our generation!"

**All that business with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named!" He glanced at the lightning scar on Harry's forehead. "I know, I know — it's not quite as good as winning Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award five times in a row, **

"It's better and more important that he defeated Voldemort!"

**as I have — but it's a start, Harry, it's a start."**

**He gave Harry a hearty wink and strode off. Harry stood stunned for a few seconds, then, remembering he was supposed to be in the greenhouse, he opened the door and slid inside.**

**Professor Sprout was standing behind a trestle bench in the center of the greenhouse. About twenty pairs of different-colored ear muffs were lying on the bench. When Harry had taken his place between Ron and Hermione, she said, "We'll be repotting Mandrakes today. Now, who can tell me the properties of the Mandrake?"**

**To nobody's surprise, Hermione's hand was first into the air.**

"It's because of Hermione, Gryffindor got so many points," Riley said.

"And It's because of Riley, Gryffindor lost so many points," Hermione said.

"**Mandrake, or Mandragora, is a powerful restorative," said Hermione, sounding as usual as though she had swallowed the textbook.**

"**It is used to return people who have been transfigured or cursed to their original state."**

"**Excellent. Ten points to Gryffindor," said Professor Sprout. "The Mandrake forms an essential part of most antidotes. It is also, however, dangerous. Who can tell me why?"**

**Hermione's hand narrowly missed Harry's glasses as it shot up again.**

"Sorry Harry!"

"**The cry of the Mandrake is fatal to anyone who hears it," she said promptly.**

"**Precisely. Take another ten points," said Professor Sprout. "Now, the Mandrakes we have here are still very young."**

**She pointed to a row of deep trays as she spoke, and everyone shuffled forward for a better look. A hundred or so tufty little plants, purplish green in color, were growing there in rows. They looked quite unremarkable to Harry, who didn't have the slightest idea what Hermione meant by the "cry" of the Mandrake.**

"It's exactly what you think," Frank said.

"**Everyone take a pair of earmuffs," said Professor Sprout.**

"I remember when James and Sirius took the pink and fluffy ones," Remus said.

**There was a scramble as everyone tried to seize a pair that wasn't pink and fluffy. Naturally Riley took a pink and fluffy pair.**

James and Sirius grinned at Riley.

"**When I tell you to put them on, make sure your ears are completely covered," said Professor Sprout. "When it is safe to remove them, I will give you the thumbs-up. Right — earmuffs on."**

**Harry and Riley snapped the earmuffs over their ears. They shut out sound completely. Professor Sprout put a pink, fluffy pair over her own ears, rolled up the sleeves of her robes, grasped one of the tufty plants firmly, and pulled hard.**

**Harry let out a gasp of surprise that no one could hear.**

**Instead of roots, a small, muddy, and extremely ugly baby popped out of the earth. **

"That sorta reminds me of Cabbage Patch Kids," Lily said.

"Except Cabbage Patch Kids aren't ugly," Riley said. "I saw the commercials for them."

**The leaves were growing right out of his head. He had pale green, mottled skin, and was clearly bawling at the top of his lungs. Riley thought it was uglier than Norbert when he had hatched in her first year.**

"It was," Thomas agreed.

**Professor Sprout took a large plant pot from under the table and plunged the Mandrake into it, burying him in dark, damp compost until only the tufted leaves were visible. Professor Sprout dusted off her hands, gave them all the thumbs-up, and removed her own earmuffs.**

"**As our Mandrakes are only seedlings, their cries won't kill yet," she said calmly as though she'd just done nothing more exciting than water a begonia. **

"**However, they will knock you out for several hours, and as I'm sure none of you want to miss your first day back,**

The future generation made 'phff' sounds, except for Hermione.

**make sure your earmuffs are securely in place while you work. I will attract your attention when it is time to pack up."**

"**Four to a tray — there is a large supply of pots here — compost in the sacks over there — and be careful of the Venemous Tentacula, it's teething." She gave a sharp slap to a spiky, dark red plant as she spoke, making it draw in the long feelers that had been inching sneakily over her shoulder.**

**Thomas went and joined Riley, Dean, and Seamus (most likely to apologize to Riley). Harry, Ron, and Hermione were joined at their tray by a curly-haired Hufflepuff boy Harry knew by sight but had never spoken to.**

"Justin Finch-Fletchley," the certain five said in unison.

"**Justin Finch-Fletchley," he said brightly, shaking Harry by the hand. "Know who you are, of course, the famous Harry Potter… And you're Hermione Granger — always top in everything" (Hermione beamed as she had her hand shaken too) "— and Ron Weasley. Wasn't that your flying car?"**

**Ron didn't smile. The Howler was obviously still on his mind.**

"**That Lockhart's something, isn't he?" said Justin happily as they began filling their plant pots with dragon dung compost. "Awfully brave chap.**

Everyone snorted.

**Have you read his books? I'd have died of fear if I'd been cornered in a telephone booth by a werewolf,**

"Actually the werewolf would kill you before you could do anything," Remus said quietly.

**but he stayed cool and — zap — just fantastic.** **My name was down for Eton, you know. I can't tell you how glad I am I came here instead. Of course, Mother was slightly disappointed, but since I made her read Lockhart's books I think she's begun to see how useful it'll be to have a fully trained wizard in the family…"**

"Hey Harry," Riley suddenly said.

"What?" Harry asked.

"We need to summon someone here."

Hermione's eyes widened, "Riley we can't –"

"Herms, he needs to be here, he should be here, it's not far that he hasn't met his normal parents."

Harry nodded, realizing who Riley was talking about. He muttered something, and then _poof_.

Neville was in the middle of the room, with a confused expression.

"Hello Neville," Ron said simply.

"Guys, I thought you said I needed to stay back, so I could cover for you," Neville said.

"Yes, but you need to be here," Riley said.

"That may be the most touching thing you've ever said to me."

"I'm on a roll today," she told him, "there's some people you should meet," Riley turned to Frank and Alice, "Frank, Alice, meet Neville, Neville meet, Frank and Alice."

"My parents…" Neville said softly.

"Should I tell them?"

"Please."

"Well Frank, Alice," Riley started, "Long story short, Neville was one of two kids in this prophecy, this prophecy was said to have the power to take Old Voldy down. My father's cousin Bellatrix, along with three other Deatheaters tortured you two to the point of insanity, with the Cruciatus Curse."

The room was silent. Frank and Alice simply got up and hugged their son.

**After that they didn't have much chance to talk. Their earmuffs were back on and they needed to concentrate on the Mandrakes. Professor Sprout had made it look extremely easy, but it wasn't. The Mandrakes didn't like coming out of the earth, but didn't seem to want to go back into it either. They squirmed, kicked, flailed their sharp little fists, and gnashed their teeth; Harry spent ten whole minutes trying to squash a particularly fat one into a pot.**

"Harry, you need to be gentle with Mandrakes," Neville said.

**By the end of the class, Harry and Riley, like everyone else, were sweaty, aching, and covered in earth. Everyone traipsed back to the castle for a quick wash and then the Gryffindors hurried off to Transfiguration.**

**Professor McGonagall's classes were always hard work, but today was especially difficult. **

"Beetles?"

"Yup…"

**Everything Harry and Riley had learned last year seemed to have leaked out of their heads during the summer. **

"When Dumbledore tells us to empty our heads during the summer, it just makes school extremely hard," Sirius said.

**They was supposed to be turning a beetle into a button, but all Harry managed to do was give his beetle a lot of exercise as it scuttled over the desktop avoiding his wand.**

"On the bright side, it was the fittest bug in class," Thomas said.

**Riley and Thomas (who were back to being best friends) couldn't get their beetles to turn into buttons after a while they gave up. Instead they talked through the beetles in high pitched voices. **

Remus sighed and shook his head.

**On the bright side, they were having a blast.**

**Ron was having far worse problems. He had patched up his wand with some borrowed Spellotape, but it seemed to be damaged beyond repair. **

"You should have told them," Hermione said.

**It kept crackling and sparking at odd moments, and every time Ron tried to transfigure his beetle it engulfed him in thick gray smoke that smelled of rotten eggs. Unable to see what he was doing, Ron accidentally squashed his beetle with his elbow**

"NO! NOT THE BEETLE! HE NEVER SAW IT COMING!" James and Sirius cried.

**and had to ask for a new one. Professor McGonagall wasn't pleased.**

**Harry was relieved to hear the lunch bell. His brain felt like a wrung sponge. Everyone filed out of the classroom except him and Ron, who was whacking his wand furiously on the desk.**

"**Stupid — useless — thing —"**

"**Write home for another one," Harry suggested as the wand let off a volley of bangs like a firecracker.**

"I wouldn't have sent a Howler," Molly said.

"**Oh, yeah, and get another Howler back," said Ron, stuffing the now hissing wand into his bag. **"**It's your own fault your wand got snapped — '"**

**They went down to lunch, where Ron's mood was not improved by Hermione's showing them the handful of perfect coat buttons she had produced in Transfiguration.**

A certain four glared at Hermione.

"What?" Hermione asked.

"**What've we got this afternoon?" said Harry, hastily changing the subject.**

"**Defense Against the Dark Arts," said Hermione at once.**

"**Why," demanded Ron, seizing her schedule, "have you outlined all Lockhart's lessons in little hearts?"**

There were scattered laughs in the room, Hermione's face flushed.

**Hermione snatched the schedule back, blushing furiously.**

"**Does someone have a crushie wushie?" teased Riley.**

"**Says the girl that has a crush on - mpf!" said Hermione as Riley's handed covered her mouth. **

"I wasn't really going to say it!"

"Sure…"

**Riley dragged Hermione a few seats down and in a whisper, yelled at her, leaving three confused boys.**

"Boys are hopeless," Lily sighed.

**They finished lunch and went outside into the overcast courtyard. Hermione sat down on a stone step and buried her nose in Voyages with Vampires again. Riley and Thomas were talking with Neville about their summers. **

"Neville by far had the best."

"Thanks!"

"Well neither of you were almost starved to death."

**Harry and Ron stood talking about Quidditch **

"Typical," Hermione and Riley said in unison.

**for several minutes before Harry became aware that he was being closely watched. Looking up, he saw the very small, mousy-haired boy he'd seen trying on the Sorting Hat last night staring at Harry as though transfixed. He was clutching what looked like an ordinary Muggle camera, and the moment Harry looked at him, he went bright red.**

"**All right, Harry? I'm — I'm Colin Creevey," he said breathlessly, taking a tentative step forward. "I'm in Gryffindor, too. D'you think — would it be all right if — can I have a picture?" he said, raising the camera hopefully.**

The future generation grinned, until Sirius said;

"What an annoying kid!"

"SHUT UP!" the six yelled.

"Sorry, sorry. So he's your friend…"

"Yes, he is," Harry said.

"**A picture?" Harry repeated blankly.**

"**So I can prove I've met you," said Colin Creevey eagerly, edging further forward. "I know all about you. Everyone's told me. About how you survived when You-Know-Who tried to kill you and how he disappeared and everything and how you've still got a lightning scar on your forehead" (his eyes raked Harry's hairline) "and a boy in my dormitory said if I develop the film in the right potion, the pictures'll move." Colin drew a great shuddering breath of excitement and said, "It's amazing here, isn't it? I never knew all the odd stuff I could do was magic till I got the letter from Hogwarts. My dad's a milkman, he couldn't believe it either. So I'm taking loads of pictures to send home to him. And it'd be really good if I had one of you" — he looked imploringly at Harry — "maybe your friend could take it and I could stand next to you? And then, could you sign it?"**

There were snorts of laughter.

"**Signed photos? You're giving out signed photos, Potter?"**

"Malfoy…"

**Loud and scathing, Draco Malfoy's voice echoed around the courtyard. He had stopped right behind Colin, flanked, as he always was at Hogwarts, by his large and thuggish cronies, Crabbe and Goyle.**

"Or Greg and Vincent, which no on calls them," Riley said.

"**Everyone line up!" Malfoy roared to the crowd. "Harry Potter's giving out signed photos!"**

"**No, I'm not," said Harry angrily, his fists clenching. "Shut up, Malfoy."**

"**You're just jealous," piped up Colin, whose entire body was about as thick as Crabbe's neck.**

"Smart kid," Remus said.

"**Jealous?" said Malfoy, who didn't need to shout anymore: half the courtyard was listening in. "Of what? I don't want a foul scar right across my head, thanks. I don't think getting your head cut open makes you that special, myself."**

"It is if you defeated the Dark Lord," Arthur pointed out.

**Crabbe and Goyle were sniggering stupidly.**

"**Eat slugs, Malfoy," said Ron angrily. Crabbe stopped laughing and started rubbing his knuckles in a menacing way.**

"**Be careful, Weasley," sneered Malfoy. "You don't want to start any trouble or your Mummy'll have to come and take you away from school." He put on a shrill, piercing voice. "'If you put another toe out of line'—"**

**A knot of Slytherin fifth-years nearby laughed loudly at this.**

"**One more word out of your mouth Malfoy, and my fist will be where your mouth is!" shouted Riley putting her fist up.**

"Ah, the classic Dakota," Sirius said.

"**Weasley and Black would like a signed photo, Potter," smirked Malfoy. "It'd be worth more than Weasley's family's whole house —"**

**Ron whipped out his Spellotaped wand, but Hermione shut Voyages with Vampires with a snap and whispered, "Look out!"**

"**What's all this, what's all this?" Gilderoy Lockhart was striding toward them, **

Groans where all that could be heard.

**his turquoise robes swirling behind him. "Who's giving out signed photos?"**

**Harry started to speak but he was cut short as Lockhart flung an arm around his shoulders and thundered jovially, "Shouldn't have asked! We meet again, Harry!"**

**Riley and Thomas groaned.**

"You two are like Lockhart's personal negative audience," Alice said flipping through the chapter.

**Pinned to Lockhart's side and burning with humiliation, Harry saw Malfoy slide smirking back into the crowd.**

"**Come on then, Mr. Creevey," said Lockhart, beaming at Colin. "A double portrait, can't do better than that, and we'll both sign it for you."**

**Colin fumbled for his camera and took the picture as the bell rang behind them, signaling the start of afternoon classes.**

"Saved by the bell," Lily said.

"**Off you go, move along there," Lockhart called to the crowd, and he set off back to the castle with Harry, who was wishing he knew a good Vanishing Spell, still clasped to his side.**

"**A word to the wise, Harry," said Lockhart paternally as they entered the building through a side door. "I covered up for you back there with young Creevey — if he was photographing me, too, your schoolmates won't think you're setting yourself up so much…"**

**Deaf to Harry's stammers, Lockhart swept him down a corridor lined with staring students and up a staircase.**

"**Let me just say that handing out signed pictures at this stage of your career isn't sensible — looks a tad bigheaded, Harry, to be frank. There may well come a time when, like me, you'll need to keep a stack handy wherever you go, but" — he gave a little chortle — "I don't think you're quite there yet."**

"How long do you think I would be in Azkaban for killing the bloke?" James asked casually.

"Two, maybe three seconds," Alice said.

**They had reached Lockhart's classroom and he let Harry go at last. Harry yanked his robes straight and headed for a seat at the very back of the class, where he busied himself with piling all seven of Lockhart's books in front of him, so that he could avoid looking at the real thing.**

**The rest of the class came clattering in, and Ron and Hermione sat down on either side of Harry. Riley and Thomas had the seats behind them with Neville.**

"**You could've fried an egg on your face" said Ron. "You'd better hope Creevey doesn't meet Ginny, or they'll be starting a Harry Potter fan club."**

"**I call being president!" said Riley.**

"You'd've told every single detail of my life," Harry said.

"**Shut up," snapped Harry. The last thing he needed was for Lockhart to hear the phrase "Harry Potter fan club"**

**When the whole class was seated, Lockhart cleared his throat loudly and silence fell. He reached forward, picked up Neville Longbottom's copy of Travels with Trolls, and held it up to show his own, winking portrait on the front.**

"Self-centered git," Remus muttered.

"**Me," he said, pointing at it and winking as well. **"**Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award but I don't talk about that. **

"I don't talk about that, my arse!" Riley said.

**I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!"**

**He waited for them to laugh; a few people smiled weakly.**

"**I see you've all bought a complete set of my books — well done. I thought we'd start today with a little quiz. Nothing to worry about — just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in —"**

**When he had handed out the test papers he returned to the front of the class and said, "You have thirty minutes — start —now!"**

**Harry looked down at his paper and read:**

**1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite colour?**

**2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?**

**3. What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?**

**On and on it went, over three sides of paper, right down to:**

**54. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?**

"What kind of questions are these?"

"Is he serious?"

"No, I'm Sirius."

"Metaphorically speaking, Sirius!"

**Riley gaped at her paper then exchanged a 'You've got to be kidding me' look with Thomas. She then got a brilliant idea. And answered like this.**

**1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite colour?**

_**Dunno, the colour of your ego?**_

James high-fived his niece.

**2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?**

_**The circus called. They want their hair spray back.**_

"Muggle thing," Lily said before anyone could ask, laughing.

**3. What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?**

_**I cannot answer this question because the voices inside of my head are having a meeting about the importance of dental hygiene.**_

"Voices?" Remus said.

"I was only kidding," Riley said. "Or was I?"

**54. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?**

_**An angry kitty! Hiss!**_

"Crookshanks," Ron coughed.

**Thomas found this interesting and did the same.**

**1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color?**

_**Pink? I wouldn't be surprised.**_

"Me neither," Dakota said.

**2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?**

_**Have your own line of hair care potions…Again wouldn't be surprised.**_

"Me neither," multiple people said.

**3. What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?**

_**The voices in my head are also in the meeting Riley's voices are having. Dental hygiene is really important.**_

"Yes, yes it is," Sirius agreed.

**54. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?**

_**A brain?**_

"The scarecrow!" Lily, Harry, Riley, and Hermione cried.

The others stared at them.

**Half an hour later, Lockhart collected the papers and rifled through them in front of the class.**

"**Tut, tut — hardly any of you remembered that my favorite color is lilac.**

"How girly," Frank said.

**I say so in Year with the Yeti. And a few of you need to read Wanderings with Werewolves more carefully — I clearly state in chapter twelve that my ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non-magic peoples — though I wouldn't say no to a large bottle of Ogdeds Old Firewhisky!"**

Eyes were rolled.

**He gave them another roguish wink. Ron was now staring at Lockhart with an expression of disbelief on his face; Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas, who were sitting in front, were shaking with silent laughter. Hermione, on the other hand, was listening to Lockhart with rapt attention and gave a start when he mentioned her name.**

"… **but Miss Hermione Granger knew my secret ambition is to rid the world of evil and market my own range of hair-care potions."**

**Thomas gaped. He was half right. Riley was silently snickering so hard she fell out of her seat.**

"Good thing Lockhart was too stupid to notice," Thomas said.

"**Good girl! In fact" — he flipped her paper over — "full marks! **

"What?"

"Oh, Hermione."

"You out of all people."

**Where is Miss Hermione Granger?"**

**Hermione raised a trembling hand.**

"**Excellent!" beamed Lockhart. "Quite excellent! Take ten points for Gryffindor! And Miss Black and Mr. Lupin I agree, dental hygiene is very important. **

Riley and Thomas snorted.

**And so — to business —"**

**He bent down behind his desk and lifted a large, covered cage onto it.**

"**Now — be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizardkind! You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. All I ask is that you remain calm."**

The past raised an eyebrow. The six just groaned.

**In spite of himself, Harry leaned around his pile of books for a better look at the cage. Lockhart placed a hand on the cover. Dean and Seamus had stopped laughing now. Neville was cowering in his front row seat. Thomas and Riley exchanged glances of 'Please don't be a baby dragon, no more Norberts'.**

"**I must ask you not to scream," said Lockhart in a low voice. "It might provoke them."**

"Finally something interesting," James said.

**As the whole class held its breath, Lockhart whipped off the cover.**

"**Yes," he said dramatically. "Freshly caught Cornish pixies."**

The sounds of peoples' hands hitting their heads echoed throughout the room. But the past people jumped when a certain six screamed in horror, which confused everyone else.

**Seamus Finnigan and couldn't control himself. He let out a snort of laughter that even Lockhart couldn't mistake for a scream of terror.**

"**Yes?" He smiled at Seamus.**

"**Well, they're not — they're not very —dangerous, are they?" Seamus choked.**

"Oh they are," Neville said.

Riley sympathetically patted his back.

"**Don't be so sure!" said Lockhart, waggling a finger annoyingly at Seamus. "Devilish tricky little blighters they can be!"**

**The pixies were electric blue and about eight inches high, with pointed faces and voices so shrill it was like listening to a lot of budgies arguing. The moment the cover had been removed, they had started jabbering and rocketing around, rattling the bars and making bizarre faces at the people nearest them.**

"**Right, then," Lockhart said loudly. "Let's see what you make of them!" And he opened the cage.**

"WHAT?" the past people shouted.

**It was pandemonium. The pixies shot in every direction like rockets. Two of them seized Neville by the ears and lifted him into the air. **

"NEVILLE!" many shouted.

"ME!" Neville shouted.

"**NEVILLE!" shouted Riley, as she and Thomas scrambled on to the top of their desk, trying grab Neville. "NOT NEVILLE!"**

"Thanks for the attempt," Neville said.

"No problem," Riley and Thomas said in unison.

**Several shot straight through the window, showering the back row with broken glass. The rest proceeded to wreck the classroom more effectively than a rampaging rhino. They grabbed ink bottles and sprayed the class with them, shredded books and papers, tore pictures from the walls, up-ended the waste basket, grabbed bags and books and threw them out of the smashed window; within minutes, half the class was sheltering under desks and Neville was swinging from the iron chandelier in the ceiling.**

James looked at Neville, "Neville, you have the worst of luck."

"**Come on now — round them up, round them up, they're only pixies," Lockhart shouted.**

"He should have given you guys a warning," Lily said angrily.

**He rolled up his sleeves, brandished his wand, and bellowed, "Peskipiksi Pesternomi!"**

**It had absolutely no effect; one of the pixies seized his wand and threw it out of the window, too. Lockhart gulped and dived under his own desk, narrowly avoiding being squashed by Neville, who fell a second later as the chandelier gave way.**

"Before you ask, yes it did hurt, really badly."

**The bell rang and there was a mad rush toward the exit. In the relative calm that followed, Lockhart straightened up, caught sight of Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley, who were almost at the door, and said, "Well, I'll ask you five to just nip the rest of them back into their cage." He swept past them and shut the door quickly behind him.**

"Arse," many said.

"**Can you believe him?" roared Ron as one of the remaining pixies bit him painfully on the ear.**

"**He just wants to give us some hands-on experience," **

"HERMIONE?"

"REALLY?"

**said Hermione, immobilizing two pixies at once with a clever Freezing Charm and stuffing them back into their cage.**

"**Hands on?" said Harry, who was trying to grab a pixie dancing out of reach with its tongue out. "Hermione, he didn't have a clue what he was doing —"**

"He never did," Hermione admitted.

"**He's a numskull!" shouted Riley swatting pixies that were tugging her hair.**

"**He didn't even try to save Neville!"**

"Well most of our Defense professors were heartless," Neville said.

**said Thomas who was blocking a book two pixies threw at him.**

"**Rubbish," said Hermione. "You've read his books — look at all those amazing things he's done —"**

"I doubt he did any of the stuff in the books," Remus said.

"**He says he's done," Ron muttered.**

**After half an hour they had gotten all the Cornish pixies were back in the cage each one frozen. They left quickly so they wouldn't have to clean up the mess. **

"The git made poor old Filch clean the mess up," Thomas said.

**Riley and Thomas were the last ones out of the room. They were both very exhausted.**

"**Worst Defense class ever!" said Thomas. Riley nodded.**

"**Have read his books?" said Riley. "I mean – oof - "**

Everyone but Thomas and Riley looked confused.

**Someone had walked right into Riley.**

"No you walked right into him," Thomas said.

"**Watch where you're going," shouted Riley.**

**She would have said more, but in front of her was a very short, about a foot shorter than her. The boy had straight black hair that went down to his chin and bangs that almost covered his brown eyes. In his hands was a book. The boy had to be a first year. Riley looked at his tie to see that he too was a Gryffindor.**

"Oh, it's Alex, that's how you meet him," Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Neville said.

"**I could say the same for you," said the boy quietly with a smirk.**

"Ooh, I like this kid," James said.

"**Okay we both should've watched where we are going," said Riley.**

"**Rye, you never watch where you're going," piped in Thomas.**

"**Shut it Thomas."**

"**It's true."**

"**Just shut it Thomas."**

"**Excuse me!" interrupted the boy, "Do you know the way to the common room?"**

"Firstie," Sirius said automatically.

**Riley and Thomas looked down at the boy.**

"**Of course we do," they said in unison.**

"**I take it you're an ickle firstie," said Riley.**

"You must talk to Peeves too much," Frank said.

**Thomas shook his head and said, "You talk to Peeves too much"**

Frank didn't bother saying anything

**then to the boy, "Come with us."**

"**Okay," said the boy. "But what year are you guys in? Fourth?"**

"We weren't that tall were we, Harry?" Riley asked.

"To be honest Riley, you've always been taller than me, but I would say no," Harry told her.

"**Second actually," said Thomas. "We're just taller than the average twelve year olds."**

**As they walked down the hallway they were silent.**

**Until Riley asked the boy what his name was.**

"**Alexander," he told her.**

"That's a nice name," Dakota said.

"**I remember you," said Thomas. "Alexander Cepheus, right? The hat took a few minutes to sort you. Did it have trouble deciding where to put you?"**

**Alexander nodded and said, "He was stuck between Gryffindor and Slytherin. He said if I went to Slytherin I could become a powerful pureblooded wizard and if I went to Gryffindor I could find people that I belong with. He also told me most of my family was in Slytherin, but my immediate family were sorted into Gryffindor. I don't want to be a powerful wizard so I chose Gryffindor because of what the hat said about it."**

"I take it this kid is Muggle-born," Alice said.

"Well…" Riley said hesitantly.

**Riley blinked. The hat considered to put her in Slytherin too.**

"**The Sorting Hat considered putting me in Slytherin too," said Riley finally.**

"**You never told me that!" exclaimed Thomas.**

"You didn't tell anyone else until fifth year, either," Ron said.

"**It wasn't important, Thomas," said Riley. "Anyway most of my family was in Slytherin except for a few."**

**There was silence.**

"**So your last name's Cepheus," said Riley. "Interesting."**

"It is," Arthur said.

"**No, it's my middle name," said Alexander. "No one knows my last name."**

**Riley and Thomas looked at each other in confusion.**

"**I was dropped off at an orphanage when I was a few weeks old. You see, all the information my parents left the orphanage were my first and middle name and my birth date."**

"Who would do that to such a small child?" Molly exclaimed.

**Riley put a hand on Alexander's shoulder and said, "I'm sorry, but I know how you feel. My friend, not Thomas, and I we have no parents. My friend's parents are dead, my mum is dead, and my father is locked up in the wizard prison. For about the last eleven years we have been living with my friend's aunt, uncle, and cousin."**

**Soon enough the trio reached the common room, Riley and Thomas hoping this wouldn't be the last time they talked to Alexander.**

"Aw," Alice said, looked at the future children. "Any of you want to read?"

"No," Hermione said, "we'll be reading the third book."

"But – "

"Just give the book to Dakota."

_A/N Well there's Chapter Six… also Neville. Still taking suggestions for more characters to read with them._


	7. Mudbloods and Murmurs

_A/N Two chapters in one day!_

_I still don't own Harry Potter._

"**Chapter Seven; Mudbloods and Murmurs**," Dakota read.

"Mudbloods?" Sirius asked. "I bet I know who said that foul word.

**Harry spent a lot of time over the next few days dodging out of sight whenever he saw Gilderoy Lockhart coming down a corridor. Harder to avoid was Colin Creevey, who seemed to have memorized Harry's schedule. **

"I'll admit that was pretty creepy," Harry said.

**Nothing seemed to give Colin a bigger thrill than to say, "All right, Harry?" six or seven times a day and hear, "Hello, Colin," back, however exasperated Harry sounded when he said it.**

"From what I know, Colin was having a hard time making friends," Thomas said.

**Hedwig and Midnight were still angry with Harry and Riley about the disastrous car journey**

Riley frowned and said, "Midnight kept trying to attack my head."

**and Ron's wand was still malfunctioning, surpassing itself on Friday morning by shooting out of Ron's hand in Charms and hitting tiny old Professor Flitwick squarely between the eyes, creating a large, throbbing green boil where it had struck. So with one thing and another, Harry was quite glad to reach the weekend. He, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley were planning to visit Hagrid on Saturday morning.**

Everyone cheered, even Teddy.

**Harry, however, was shaken awake several hours earlier than he would have liked by Oliver Wood, Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.**

"**Whassamatter?" said Harry groggily.**

"James never would've responded like that," Remus said.

"Yeah, he'd be the one waking you up!" Sirius exclaimed.

"**Quidditch practice!" said Wood. "Come on!"**

**Harry squinted at the window. There was a thin mist hanging across the pink-and-gold sky. Now that he was awake, he couldn't understand how he could have slept through the racket the birds were making.**

"Some people are heavy sleepers," Lily said.

"**Oliver," Harry croaked. "It's the crack of dawn."**

"**Exactly," said Wood. He was a tall and burly sixth year and, at the moment, his eyes were gleaming with a crazed enthusiasm. "It's part of our new training program. Come on, grab your broom, and let's go," said Wood heartily. "None of the other teams have started training yet; we're going to be first off the mark this year —"**

"**Katie! Wake up Riley!" he shouted down the stairs.**

"He didn't," Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Neville said in unison.

"He did," Riley groaned.

**Yawning and shivering slightly, Harry climbed out of bed and tried to find his Quidditch robes.**

"**Good man," said Wood. "Meet you on the field in fifteen minutes."**

"It took us at least twenty minutes to get there," Harry said.

**When he'd found his scarlet team robes and pulled on his cloak for warmth, Harry scribbled a note to Ron and Thomas explaining where he'd gone and went down the spiral staircase to the common room, his Nimbus Two Thousand on his shoulder where he met Riley in her scarlet robe and cloak. Riley hadn't bothered to brush her hair and had left it in the braid she had put it in the night before. She looked very grumpy and she mumbled something about Bludgers and Oliver. **

Frank winced, easily guessing what Riley was thinking.

**They had just reached the portrait hole when there was a clatter behind them and Colin Creevey came dashing down the spiral staircase, his camera swinging madly around his neck and something clutched in his hand.**

"Oh dear," Alice said.

"**I heard someone saying your name on the stairs, Harry! **

"He must be a light sleeper," Molly said.

**Look what I've got here! I've had it developed, I wanted to show you —"**

**Harry looked bemusedly at the photograph Colin was brandishing under his nose. Riley snorted.**

**A moving, black-and-white Lockhart was tugging hard on an arm Harry recognized as his own. He was pleased to see that his photographic self was putting up a good fight and refusing to be dragged into view. As Harry watched, Lockhart gave up and slumped, panting, against the white edge of the picture.**

Snorts filled the room.

"**Will you sign it?" said Colin eagerly.**

"**No," said Harry flatly, glancing around to check that the room was really deserted. "Sorry, Colin, I'm in a hurry — Quidditch practice —"**

**They climbed through the portrait hole.**

"**Oh, wow! Wait for me! I've never watched a Quidditch game before!"**

"But it is a practice," Arthur said.

**Colin scrambled through the hole after them.**

"**It'll be really boring," Harry said quickly, but Colin ignored him, his face shining with excitement.**

"Well this kid is not a quitter," Dakota said.

"**You were the youngest House player in a hundred years, weren't you, Harry? Weren't you?" said Colin, trotting alongside him. "You must be brilliant. I've never flown. Is it easy? Is that your own broom? Is that the best one there is?"**

"**Go away," said Riley grumpily, as she tripped over her own foot.**

"Were you walking with your eyes closed?" Remus asked.

"Maybe…"

"**Are you Harry's girlfriend?"**

**Riley choked on nothing and said, "Wouldn't dream of it! We're like brother and sister. Actually you could say we are brother and sister. Just look at our hair!"**

"Yeah, we look a lot alike," Harry said.

"**Oh."**

**Harry and Riley didn't know how to get rid of him. It was like having an extremely talkative shadow.**

"**I don't really understand Quidditch," said Colin breathlessly. "Is it true there are four balls? And two of them fly around trying to knock people off their brooms?"**

"Ack! I'm getting such a headache!" Frank said.

"**Yes," said Harry heavily, resigned to explaining the complicated rules of Quidditch.** "**They're called Bludgers. There are two Beaters on each team who carry clubs to beat the Bludgers away from their side. Fred and George Weasley are the Gryffindor Beaters. Riley is a reserve Beater which means if one of the twins can't play Quidditch for some reason she can fill in for one of them."**

"Good summary."

"Not one bit confusing."

"I wish the professors summarized like this."

"**And what are the other balls for?" Colin asked, tripping down a couple of steps because he was gazing open-mouthed at Harry.**

"**Well, the Quaffle — that's the biggish red one — is the one that scores goals. Three Chasers on each team throw the Quaffle to each other and try and get it through the goal posts at the end of the pitch — they're three long poles with hoops on the end."**

"**And the fourth ball —"**

"— **is the Golden Snitch," said Harry, "and it's very small, very fast, and difficult to catch. But that's what the Seeker's got to do, because a game of Quidditch doesn't end until the Snitch has been caught. And whichever team's Seeker gets the Snitch earns his team an extra hundred and fifty points."**

"**And you're the Gryffindor Seeker, aren't you?" said Colin in awe.**

"**Yes," said Harry as they left the castle and started across the dew-drenched grass. "And there's the Keeper, too. He guards the goal posts. That's it, really."**

"Ouch," James said. "No paragraph for Keepers."

"Sorry, but Keepers just guard the goal posts," Harry said with a shrug.

**But Colin didn't stop questioning Harry and Riley all the way down the sloping lawns to the Quidditch field, and Harry and Riley only shook him off when they reached the changing rooms; Colin called after Harry in a piping voice, "I'll go and get a good seat, Harry!" and hurried off to the stands.**

"What? No goodbye to you?" Dakota asked her daughter.

"Well back then I wasn't famous, I mean we," Riley said pointing to herself, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Neville, "are bit famous, but it was because of major event in our life."

**The rest of the Gryffindor team was already in the changing room. Wood was the only person who looked truly awake. Fred and George Weasley were sitting, puffy-eyed and tousle haired, Riley quickly took her usual seat next to them, next to them was fourth year Alicia Spinnet, who seemed to be nodding off against the wall behind her. Her fellow Chasers, Katie Bell and Angelina Johnson, were yawning side by side opposite them.**

"**There you are, Harry, Riley, what kept you?" **

"Colin," a few said.

**said Wood briskly. "Now, I wanted a quick talk with you all before we actually get onto the field, because I spent the summer devising a whole new training program, which I really think will make all the difference…"**

**Wood was holding up a large diagram of a Quidditch field, on which were drawn many lines, arrows, and crosses in different colored inks. **

"Anyone else's head hurt just listen to this?" Frank asked.

Everyone except James, Sirius, Remus, Harry, and Ron raised their hand.

**He took out his wand, tapped the board, and the arrows began to wiggle over the diagram like caterpillars. As Wood launched into a speech about his new tactics, Fred Weasley's head drooped right onto Riley's shoulder and he began to snore. Riley's head began to nod and her head drooped forward.**

Riley blinked. "I must have been so tired, because I don't remember any of that."

**The first board took nearly twenty minutes to explain, but there was another board under that, and a third under that one. Harry sank into a stupor as Wood droned on and on.**

"Wood's always been an energetic guy," Thomas said shaking his head.

"**So," said Wood, at long last, jerking Harry from a wistful fantasy about what he could be eating for breakfast at this very moment up at the castle. "Is that clear? Any questions?"**

**Riley jumped awake. She nudged Fred, waking him up. They both yawned.**

"**I've got a question, Oliver," said George, who had woken with a start. "Why couldn't you have told us all this yesterday when we were awake?"**

"That would probably have been a better idea," Hermione said.

**Wood wasn't pleased.**

"**Now, listen here, you lot," he said, glowering at them all. "We should have won the Quidditch cup last year. We're easily the best team. But unfortunately — owing to circumstances beyond our control —"**

"Would not have thought he would have used the guilt trip," Arthur said.

**Harry shifted guiltily in his seat. He had been unconscious in the hospital wing for the final match of the previous year, meaning that Gryffindor had been a player short and had suffered their worst defeat in three hundred years.**

"The team only had a beater reserve?" Remus asked, astonished.

Ron nodded the said, "When Harry became captain he made sure there were reserves."

"Captain?" James asked Harry, who nodded. "I'm so proud of you!"

Riley coughed loudly.

"Co-Captains!" she said.

"Er, I mean Riley and I were Co-Captains," Harry said. "Sorry Riley."

"Good job!" Sirius said to his daughter.

**Wood took a moment to regain control of himself. Their last defeat was clearly still torturing him.**

"**What's that funny clicking noise?" called Fred as they hurtled around the corner.**

**Harry looked into the stands. Colin was sitting in one of the highest seats, his camera raised, taking picture after picture, the sound strangely magnified in the deserted stadium.**

"They're called echoes, Harry," Neville said.

"**Look this way, Harry! This way!" he cried shrilly.**

"**Who's that?" said Fred.**

"**No idea," Harry lied,**

"Harry!" Lily scolded. "Lying is bad!"

**putting on a spurt of speed that took him as far away as possible from Colin.**

"**What's going on?" said Wood, frowning, as he skimmed through the air toward them. "Why's that first year taking pictures? I don't like it. He could be a Slytherin spy, trying to find out about our new training program."**

"SEE?"

"**He's in Gryffindor," said Riley quickly.**

"**And the Slytherins don't need a spy, Oliver," said George.**

"Why?" Alice asked.

"**What makes you say that?" said Wood testily.**

"**Because they're here in person," said George, pointing.**

**Several people in green robes were walking onto the field, broomsticks in their hands.**

"**I don't believe it!" Wood hissed in outrage. "I booked the field for today! We'll see about this!"**

"Oh dear," Molly said.

**Wood shot toward the ground, landing rather harder than he meant to in his anger, staggering slightly as he dismounted. Harry, Riley, Fred, and George followed.**

"It's a Quidditch gang!" Lily exclaimed.

Riley and Harry grinned.

"**Flint!" Wood bellowed at the Slytherin Captain. "This is our practice time! We got up specially! You can clear off now!"**

**Marcus Flint was even larger than Wood. He had a look of trollish cunning on his face as he replied, "Plenty of room for all of us, Wood."**

"He has a point," Thomas said. "You can use one half of the field for practice."

**Angelina, Alicia, and Katie had come over, too. There were no girls on the Slytherin team, who stood shoulder to shoulder, facing the Gryffindors, leering to a man.**

"**But I booked the field!" said Wood, positively spitting with rage. "I booked it!"**

"Reminds me of Percy," Hermione said.

"**Ah," said Flint. "But I've got a specially signed note here from Professor Snape. 'I, Professor S. Snape, give the Slytherin team permission to practice today on the Quidditch field owing to the need to train their new Seeker'. "**

"New Seeker?" some of the past people asked.

"**You've got a new Seeker?" said Wood, distracted. "Where?"**

**And from behind the six large figures before them came a seventh, smaller boy, smirking all over his pale, pointed face. It was Draco Malfoy.**

A few hisses filled the room. Most of them coming from Ron.

"**Malfoy…" growled Riley.**

"**Aren't you Lucius Malfoy's son?" said Fred, looking at Malfoy with dislike.**

"**Funny you should mention Draco's father," said Flint as the whole Slytherin team smiled still more broadly. "Let me show you the generous gift he's made to the Slytherin team."**

"Slytherins are creepy," Dakota said distastefully.

**All seven of them held out their broomsticks. Seven highly polished, brand-new handles and seven sets of fine gold lettering spelling the words Nimbus Two Thousand and One gleamed under the Gryffindors' noses in the early morning sun.**

James and Sirius nearly drooled.

"**Very latest model. Only came out last month," said Flint carelessly, flicking a speck of dust from the end of his own. "I believe it outstrips the old Two Thousand series by a considerable amount. As for the old Cleansweeps" — he smiled nastily at Fred and George, who were both clutching Cleansweep Fives —" sweeps the board with them."**

"I've got agree with Flint on this one," Riley admitted.

**None of the Gryffindor team could think of anything to say for a moment. Malfoy was smirking so broadly his cold eyes were reduced to slits.**

"**Oh, look," said Flint. "A field invasion."**

**Ron, Hermione, and Thomas were crossing the grass to see what was going on.**

"You guys shouldn't've come over," Harry groaned.

"You said it," Ron agreed with a miserable look on his face.

"**What's happening?" Ron asked Harry. "Why aren't you playing? And what's he doing here?"**

**He was looking at Malfoy, taking in his Slytherin Quidditch robes.**

"**I'm the new Slytherin Seeker, Weasley," said Malfoy, smugly. "Everyone's just been admiring the brooms my father's bought our team."**

"Just so he could get on the team," James hissed.

**Ron gaped, open-mouthed, at the seven superb broomsticks in front of him.**

"**Good, aren't they?" said Malfoy smoothly. "But perhaps the Gryffindor team will be able to raise some gold and get new brooms, too. You could raffle off those Cleansweep Fives; I expect a museum would bid for them."**

"Now a days, I bet they would," Thomas said.

**The Slytherin team howled with laughter.**

"**At least no one on the Gryffindor team had to buy their way in," said Hermione sharply. "They got in on pure talent."**

"Go Hermione!"

"You go girl!"

"What a Gryffindor!"

**The smug look on Malfoy's face flickered.**

"**No one asked your opinion, you filthy little Mudblood," he spat.**

Dakota, Lily, Molly, and Alice gasped. The guys looked ticked. The future six just sat there looking at everyone's expresions.

**Harry knew at once that Malfoy had said something really bad because there was an instant uproar at his words. Flint had to dive in front of Malfoy to stop Fred and George jumping on him, a very outraged Riley**

"How did you know what it meant," Molly asked Riley.

"In my first year, Thomas explained to me all the things wrong in our magical world," Riley said simpley.

**who was screaming swears at him and flailing her arms was being held back by a ticked Thomas who was also shouting a few swears**

"You swore?"

"Moony's son?"

"Only twelve?"

"Padfoot, I think your daughter was a bad influence on my son."

"I agree."

**, Alicia shrieked, "How dare you!" and Ron plunged his hand into his robes, pulled out his wand, yelling, "You'll pay for that one, Malfoy!" and pointed it furiously under Flint's arm at Malfoy's face.**

**A loud bang echoed around the stadium and a jet of green light shot out of the wrong end of Ron's wand, hitting him in the stomach and sending him reeling backward onto the grass.**

"Remember kids, if you break your wand, don't try to hex someone," Frank said aloud.

"**Ron! Ron! Are you all right?" squealed Hermione.**

**Ron opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Instead he gave an almighty belch and several slugs dribbled out of his mouth onto his lap.**

No one could help but laugh.

"**What the heck?" said Thomas kneeling next to Ron.**

**The Slytherin team were paralyzed with laughter. Flint was doubled up, hanging onto his new broomstick for support. Malfoy was laughing so hard he was crying.**

**Riley's eyes narrowed at Draco.**

"Uh-oh, furious Black alert," James said.

"**YOU EVIL FERRET! HOW DARE YOU! YOU STAY AWAY FROM MY FRIENDS!" she shouted stomping over to Malfoy. She pulled her arm back and punched Malfoy square in the nose, instantly making it bleed. Satisfied, she walked back over to her friends.**

Everyone cheered.

"**We'd better get him to Hagrid's, it's nearest," said Harry to Hermione, Thomas, and Riley. Thomas and Riley lifted Ron's feet while Hermione and Harry took his arms.**

"**What happened, Harry? What happened? Is he ill? But you can cure him, can't you?" Colin had run down from his seat and was now dancing alongside them as they left the field. Ron gave a huge heave and more slugs dribbled down his front.**

"**Oooh," said Colin, fascinated and raising his camera. "Can you hold him still, Harry?"**

"Seriously?" Alice said.

"**Not the time Colin!" growled Thomas. **

"**Get out of the way, Colin!" said Harry angrily. He, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley carried Ron out of the stadium and across the grounds toward the edge of the forest.**

"**Nearly there, Ron," said Hermione as the gamekeeper's cabin came into view. "You'll be all right in a minute — almost there —"**

"Aww…" Lily and Dakota cooed.

**They were within twenty feet of Hagrid's house when the front door opened, but it wasn't Hagrid who emerged. Gilderoy Lockhart, wearing robes of palest mauve today, came striding out.**

"**Quick, behind here," Harry hissed, dragging Ron behind a nearby bush. Hermione, Thomas, and Riley followed, somewhat reluctantly.**

"**It's a simple matter if you know what you're doing!" Lockhart was saying loudly to Hagrid. "If you need help, you know where I am! I'll let you have a copy of my book. I'm surprised you haven't already got one — I'll sign one tonight and send it over. Well, good-bye!" And he strode away toward the castle.**

"He thinks Hagrid can't do his own job?" Remus said.

**Harry waited until Lockhart was out of sight, then pulled Ron out of the bush and up to Hagrid's front door. They knocked urgently.**

**Hagrid appeared at once, looking very grumpy, but his expression brightened when he saw who it was.**

"That's us," Riley said. "Making people happy since 1991!"

"**Bin wonderin' when you'd come ter see me — come in, come in — thought you mighta bin Professor Lockhart back again —"**

**Harry, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley supported Ron over the threshold into the one-roomed cabin, which had an enormous bed in one corner, a fire crackling merrily in the other. Hagrid didn't seem perturbed by Ron's slug problem,**

"That's because it happened to Sirius once, courtesy of Dakota," James explained.

**which Harry hastily explained as he lowered Ron into a chair.**

"**Better out than in," he said cheerfully, plunking a large copper basin in front of him. "Get 'em all up, Ron."**

There were a few chuckles.

"**I don't think there's anything to do except wait for it to stop," said Hermione anxiously, watching Ron bend over the basin. "That's a difficult curse to work at the best of times, but with a broken wand —"**

**Hagrid was bustling around making them tea. His boarhound, Fang, was slobbering on Riley's knee.**

"**What did Lockhart want with you, Hagrid?" Riley asked, scratching Fang's ears. Dogs always liked Riley and Riley always liked them too.**

"I wonder why?"

"I've got nothing."

"Probably has nothing to do with this guy we know."

"**Givin' me advice on gettin' kelpies out of a well," growled Hagrid, moving a half-plucked rooster off his scrubbed table and setting down the teapot. "Like I don' know. An' bangin' on about some banshee he banished. If one word of it was true, I'll eat my kettle."**

**It was most unlike Hagrid to criticize a Hogwarts' teacher, and Harry, Thomas, and Riley looked at him in surprise. Hermione, however, said in a voice somewhat higher than usual, "I think you're being a bit unfair. Professor Dumbledore obviously thought he was the best man for the job —"**

Everyone rolled their eyes.

"**He was the on'y man for the job," said Hagrid, offering them a plate of treacle fudge, while Ron coughed squelchily into his basin. "An' I mean the on'y one. Gettin' very difficult ter find anyone fer the Dark Arts job. People aren't too keen ter take it on, see. They're startin' ter think it's jinxed. **

"It was jinxed," Neville said.

**No one's lasted long fer a while now. So tell me," said Hagrid, jerking his head at Ron. "Who was he tryin' ter curse?"**

"**Malfoy called Hermione something — it must've been really bad, because everyone went wild and Riley punched him." said Harry.**

"One of the worst things you can say," Remus said.

"**It was bad," said Ron hoarsely, emerging over the tabletop looking pale and sweaty. "Malfoy called her 'Mudblood,' Hagrid —"**

**Ron dived out of sight again as a fresh wave of slugs made their appearance. Hagrid looked outraged.**

"**He didn'!" he growled at Hermione.**

"**He did," she said. "But I don't know what it means. I could tell it was really rude, of course —"**

"**It's about the most insulting thing he could think of," said Thomas. "Mudblood's a really foul name for someone who is Muggle-born — you know, non-magic parents. There are some wizards — like Malfoy's family — who think they're better than everyone else because they're what people call pure-blood."**

"Stupid pure-bloods!" Lily said.

"Hey!" Arthur, Molly, Alice, Frank, James, Sirius, Dakota, Ron, Riley, and Neville shouted.

"Sorry!"

**Ron gave a small burp, and a** **single slug fell into his outstretched hand. He threw it into the basin and continued for Thomas, "I mean, the rest of us know it doesn't make any difference at all. Look at Neville Longbottom — he's pure-blood and he can hardly stand a cauldron the right way up."**

Neville crossed his arms.

"Sorry Neville.

"**Ron!" scolded Thomas.**

"**Chill Tommy, we all know it's true," said Riley.**

"Really?" Neville asked, hurt.

"Sorry Nev," Riley said.

Neville was a bit upset. When they were younger, Riley was one of his only friends.

**Thomas glared at her for calling him Tommy.**

"**An' they haven't invented a spell our Hermione can' do," said Hagrid proudly, making Hermione go a brilliant shade of magenta.**

"**It's a disgusting thing to call someone," said Ron, wiping his sweaty brow with a shaking hand. "Dirty blood, see. Common blood. It's ridiculous. Most wizards these days are half-blood anyway. If we hadn't married Muggles we'd've died out."**

"Yet there is ten purebloods in the room…" Remus said.

**He retched and ducked out of sight again.**

"**Well, I don' blame yeh fer tryin' ter curse him, Ron," said Hagrid loudly over the thuds of more slugs hitting the basin. "Bu' maybe it was a good thing yer wand backfired. 'Spect Lucius Malfoy would've come marchin' up ter school if yeh'd cursed his son. Least yer not in trouble."**

"**Do you think Riley'll get in trouble?" Thomas asked.**

"**Doubt it," said Hagrid.**

"**Probably too embarrassed I gave him a bloody nose," said Riley with a smirk. **

Sirius smirked.

**Harry would have pointed out that trouble didn't come much worse than having slugs pouring out of your mouth, but he couldn't; Hagrid's treacle fudge had cemented his jaws together.**

"**Harry," said Hagrid abruptly as though struck by a sudden thought. "Gotta bone ter pick with yeh. I've heard you've bin givin' out signed photos. How come I haven't got one?"**

Everyone started laughing, hard.

**Riley and Thomas burst into loud laughter.**

**Furious, Harry wrenched his teeth apart.**

"**I have not been giving out signed photos," he said hotly. "If Lockhart's still spreading that around —"**

**But then he saw that Hagrid was laughing.**

"You over react sometimes," Thomas said.

"**I'm on'y jokin'," he said, patting Harry genially on the back and sending him face first into the table. "I knew yeh hadn't really. I told Lockhart yeh didn' need teh. Yer more famous than him without tryin'."**

"**Bet he didn't like that," said Harry, sitting up and rubbing his chin.**

"**Don' think he did," said Hagrid, his eyes twinkling. "An' then I told him I'd never read one o' his books an' he decided ter go. Treacle fudge, Ron?" he added as Ron reappeared.**

"**No thanks," said Ron weakly. "Better not risk it."**

"Good idea," Arthur said.

"**Come an' see what I've bin growin'," said Hagrid as Harry, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley finished the last of their tea.**

**In the small vegetable patch behind Hagrid's house were a dozen of the largest pumpkins Harry had ever seen. Each was the size of a large boulder.**

"Wow."

"What has he been feeding them?"

"**Gettin' on well, aren't they?" said Hagrid happily. "Fer the Halloween feast… should be big enough by then."**

"**What've you been feeding them?" said Harry.**

**Hagrid looked over his shoulder to check that they were alone.**

"**Well, I've bin givin' them — you know — a bit o' help —"**

"Oh Hagrid," Molly said shaking her head.

**Harry and Riley noticed Hagrid's flowery pink umbrella leaning against the back wall of the cabin. Harry and Riley had had reason to believe before now that this umbrella was not all it looked; in fact, they had the strong impression that Hagrid's old school wand was concealed inside it. Hagrid wasn't supposed to use magic. He had been expelled from Hogwarts in his third year, but Harry and Riley had never found out why — any mention of the matter and Hagrid would clear his throat loudly and become mysteriously deaf until the subject was changed.**

"**An Engorgement Charm, I suppose?" said Hermione, halfway between disapproval and amusement. "Well, you've done a good job on them."**

"**That's what yer little sister said," said Hagrid, nodding at Ron. "Met her jus' yesterday." Hagrid looked sideways at Harry, his beard twitching. "Said she was jus' lookin' round the grounds, but I reckon she was hopin' she might run inter someone else at my house." He winked at Harry. "If yeh ask me, she wouldn' say no ter a signed —"**

Everyone began laughing again.

"**Oh, shut up," said Harry. Ron snorted with laughter and the ground was sprayed with slugs.**

"**Watch it!" Hagrid roared, pulling Ron away from his precious pumpkins.**

**It was nearly lunchtime and as Harry had only had one bit of treacle fudge since dawn, he was keen to go back to school to eat. They said good-bye to Hagrid and walked back up to the castle, Ron hiccoughing occasionally, but only bringing up two very small slugs.**

Ron shuddered. Thinking of slugs gave him the willies.

**They had barely set foot in the cool entrance hall when a voice rang out, "There you are, Black, Potter — Weasley." Professor McGonagall was walking toward them, looking stern. "You three will do your detentions this evening."**

"**What're we doing, Professor?" said Ron, nervously suppressing a burp.**

"**You will be polishing the silver in the trophy room with Mr. Filch," said Professor McGonagall. "And no magic, Weasley — elbow grease."**

"Dang."

"What luck."

**Ron gulped. Argus Filch, the caretaker, was loathed by every student in the school.**

"**You, Potter, will be helping Professor Lockhart answer his fan mail," said Professor McGonagall.**

"Horrible!"

"The horror!"

"**Oh n — Professor, can't I go and do the trophy room, too?" said Harry desperately.**

**"Certainly not," said Professor McGonagall, raising her eyebrows. "Professor Lockhart requested you particularly. And you Black will be helping Professor Snape clean up the Potions Classroom."**

"Ouch, why?"

"The twins exploded seven cauldrons."

"**Aw, Professor can't I help Mr. Filch," whined Riley.**

"**Eight o'clock sharp, all three of you." said Professor McGonagall sternly.**

**Harry, Ron, and Riley slouched into the Great Hall in states of deepest gloom, Hermione and Thomas behind them, wearing a well-you-did-break-school-rules sort of expressions. Harry and Riley didn't enjoy there shepherd's pie as much as they'd thought. Both they and Ron felt they'd got the worse deal. **

"All equally as bad," Neville said.

"**Filch'll have me there all night," said Ron heavily. "No magic! There must be about a hundred cups in that room. I'm no good at Muggle cleaning."**

"**I'd swap anytime," said Harry hollowly. "I've had loads of practice with the Dursleys. Answering Lockhart's fan mail… he'll be a nightmare…"**

Many nodded in agreement.

**Saturday afternoon seemed to melt away, and in what seemed like no time, it was five minutes to eight, and Harry was dragging his feet along the second-floor corridor to Lockhart's office. He gritted his teeth and knocked.**

**The door flew open at once. Lockhart beamed down at him.**

"**Ah, here's the scalawag!" he said. **

"Eh – what?"

"Did he?"

"Weirdo."

"Scalawag?"

"**Come in, Harry, come in —"**

**Shining brightly on the walls by the light of many candles were countless framed photographs of Lockhart. He had even signed a few of them. Another large pile lay on his desk.**

"**You can address the envelopes!" Lockhart told Harry, as though this was a huge treat.**

"**This first one's to Gladys Gudgeon, bless her — huge fan of mine —"**

"She still is," Hermione said shaking her head.

**The minutes snailed by. Harry let Lockhart's voice wash over him, occasionally saying, "Mmm" and "Right" and "Yeah." Now and then he caught a phrase like, "Fame's a fickle friend, Harry," or "Celebrity is as celebrity does, remember that."**

**The candles burned lower and lower, making the light dance over the many moving faces of Lockhart watching him. Harry moved his aching hand over what felt like the thousandth envelope, writing out Veronica Smethley's address. It must be nearly time to leave, Harry thought miserably, please let it be nearly time…**

"That's exactly what I think in class!" Sirius exclaimed.

**And then he heard something — something quite apart from the spitting of the dying candles and Lockhart's prattle about his fans.**

**It was a voice, a voice to chill the bone marrow, a voice of breathtaking, ice-cold venom.**

"**Come… come to me… Let me rip you... Let me tear you... Let me kill you…"**

The past looked confused.

**Harry gave a huge jump and a large lilac blot appeared on Veronica Smethley's street.**

"**What?" he said loudly.**

"**I know!" said Lockhart. "Six solid months at the top of the best-seller list! Broke all records!"**

"**No," said Harry frantically. "That voice!"**

"You heard a voice?"

"That's not good."

"**Sorry?" said Lockhart, looking puzzled. "What voice?"**

"**That — that voice that said — didn't you hear it?"**

**Lockhart was looking at Harry in high astonishment.**

"**What are you talking about, Harry? Perhaps you're getting a little drowsy? Great Scott — look at the time! We've been here nearly four hours! I'd never have believed it — the time's flown, hasn't it?"**

"No," Harry said flatly.

**Harry didn't answer. He was straining his ears to hear the voice again, but there was no sound now except for Lockhart telling him he mustn't expect a treat like this every time he got detention. Feeling dazed, Harry left.**

**It was so late that the Gryffindor common room was almost empty. He spotted Riley and walked over to her.**

"**Ronald's not back yet," she said.**

"**How was your punishment?" said Harry.**

"**I had an interesting time," said Riley. "Snape only lasted two hours. I kept asking him about his childhood. I may have lost our house eighty-three and a half points, but it was worth it."**

"Did he tell you any of his childhood?" Dakota asked.

"Yes, but only to get me to shut up."

"And eighty-three and a half points."

"Weird man he is."

**With that she walked up to her dorm.**

**Harry rolled his eyes and went straight up to the dormitory. He pulled on his pajamas, got into bed, and waited. Half an hour later, Ron arrived, nursing his right arm and bringing a strong smell of polish into the darkened room.**

"**My muscles have all seized up," he groaned, sinking on his bed. "Fourteen times he made me buff up that Quidditch cup before he was satisfied. And then I had another slug attack all over a Special Award for Services to the School. **

Many cringed.

**Took ages to get the slime off… How was it with Lockhart?"**

**Keeping his voice low so as not to wake Thomas, Neville, Dean, and Seamus, Harry told Ron exactly what he had heard.**

"**And Lockhart said he couldn't hear it?" said Ron. Harry could see him frowning in the moonlight. "D'you think he was lying? But I don't get it — even someone invisible would've had to open the door."**

"**I know," said Harry, lying back in his four-poster and staring at the canopy above him. "I don't get it either."**

"Okay then," Dakota said handing the book to James.

"What a sluggish chapter," James said.

"Shut up," Ron said with a shudder.

_A/N I didn't like this chapter. Still taking character suggestions. Luna and Ginny will be reading with them after this book._


	8. The Deathday Party

_A/N I don't own Harry Potter._

"**Chapter Eight; The Deathday Party**," James read.

"A deathday party?" Remus said. "I've heard about those.

**October arrived, spreading a damp chill over the grounds and into the castle. Madam Pomfrey, the nurse, was kept busy by a sudden spate of colds among the staff and students. Her Pepperup potion worked instantly, though it left the drinker smoking at the ears for several hours afterward. **

Riley and Thomas cringed. They had both gotten a cold and had to take the potion. Sure it tasted fine, to be exact it tasted like peppermints, but who wants to go around with their ears smoking. A bunch of times Riley thought her head was on fire.

**Ginny Weasley, who had been looking pale, was bullied into taking some by Percy. The steam pouring from under her vivid hair gave the impression that her whole head was on fire.**

A few snorts were heard.

**Raindrops the size of bullets thundered on the castle windows for days on end; the lake rose, the flower beds turned into muddy streams, and Hagrid's pumpkins swelled to the size of garden sheds. Oliver Wood's enthusiasm for regular training sessions, however, was not dampened, which was why Harry and Riley were to be found, late one stormy Saturday afternoon a few days before Halloween, returning to Gryffindor Tower, drenched to the skin and splattered with mud.**

"I hate when that happens, it makes me feel like an incredibly handsome used sponge," Sirius said.

"Yeah incredibly handsome are the right words," Dakota muttered.

**Even aside from the rain and wind it hadn't been a happy practice session. Fred, George, and Riley, who had been spying on the Slytherin team, had seen for themselves the speed of those new Nimbus Two Thousand and Ones. They reported that the Slytherin team was no more than seven greenish blurs, shooting through the air like missiles. **

Quidditch players and fans booed.

**As Harry and Riley squelched along the deserted corridor he came across somebody who looked just as preoccupied as he was. Nearly Headless Nick, the ghost of Gryffindor Tower, was staring morosely out of a window, muttering under his breath, "… don't fulfill their requirements… half an inch, if that…"**

"**Hello, Nick," said Harry and Riley in unison.**

"You two act like twins," Lily said.

"We do?" Harry and Riley said in unison, they looked at each other. "Stop it! No, you stop it! GAH!"

Everyone but Harry and Riley laughed hard.

"**Hello, hello," said Nearly Headless Nick, starting and looking round. He wore a dashing, plumed hat on his long curly hair, and a tunic with a ruff, which concealed the fact that his neck was almost completely severed. He was pale as smoke, and Harry and Riley could see right through him to the dark sky and torrential rain outside.**

"**You look troubled, young Potter, Black," said Nick, folding a transparent letter as he spoke and tucking it inside his doublet.**

"**So do you," said Harry.**

"**Ah," Nearly Headless Nick waved an elegant hand, "a matter of no importance… It's not as though I really wanted to join…Thought I'd apply, but apparently I 'don't fulfill requirements' —"**

**In spite of his airy tone, there was a look of great bitterness on his face.**

"**But you would think, wouldn't you," he erupted suddenly, pulling the letter back out of his pocket, "that getting hit forty-five times in the neck with a blunt axe would qualify you to join the Headless Hunt?"**

"Blunt?"

"Ouch!"

"Poor Nick…"

"**Oh — yes," said Harry and Riley, who were obviously supposed to agree.**

"**I mean, nobody wishes more than I do that it had all been quick and clean, and my head had come off properly, I mean, it would have saved me a great deal of pain and ridicule. However—" Nearly Headless Nick shook his letter open and read furiously:**

"'**We can only accept huntsmen whose heads have parted company with their bodies. You will appreciate that it would be impossible otherwise for members to participate in hunt activities such as Horseback Head-Juggling and Head Polo. It is with the greatest regret, therefore, that I must inform you that you do not fulfill our requirements. With very best wishes, Sir Patrick Delaney-Podmore.'"**

**Fuming, Nearly Headless Nick stuffed the letter away.**

"Well I for one am glad he is not part of the group," Neville said. "He's the nicest ghost at Hogwarts."

"**Half an inch of skin and sinew holding my neck on, Harry, Riley! Most people would think that's good and beheaded, but oh, no, it's not enough for Sir Properly Decapitated-Podmore."**

**Nearly Headless Nick took several deep breaths and then said, in a far calmer tone, "So — what's bothering you two? Anything I can do?"**

"**No," said Harry. "Not unless you know where we can get eight free Nimbus Two Thousand and Ones for our match**

"I'm not sure ghosts get free broomsticks," Hermione said.

**against Sly—"**

**The rest of Harry's sentence was drowned out by a high-pitched mewling from somewhere near his ankles. He and Riley looked down and found themself gazing into a pair of lamp-like yellow eyes. It was Mrs. Norris, the skeletal gray cat who was used by the caretaker, Argus Filch, as a sort of deputy in his endless battle against students.**

"**You'd better get out of here, Harry, Riley," said Nick quickly. "Filch isn't in a good mood **— **he's got the flu and some third years accidentally plastered frog brains all over the ceiling in dungeon five. **

"Accidently, that's what they all say," Frank said.

**He's been cleaning all morning, and if he sees you dripping mud all over the place —"**

"**Right," said Harry and Riley, backing away from the accusing stare of Mrs. Norris, but not quickly enough. Drawn to the spot by the mysterious power that seemed to connect him with his foul cat, Argus Filch burst suddenly through a tapestry to Harry and Riley's right, wheezing and looking wildly about for the rule-breaker. There was a thick tartan scarf bound around his head, and his nose was unusually purple.**

"I actually feel bad for him," Thomas said.

"**Filth!" he shouted, his jowls aquiver, his eyes popping alarmingly as he pointed at the muddy puddle that had dripped from Harry's and Riley's Quidditch robes. "Mess and muck everywhere! I've had enough of it, I tell you! Follow me, Potter, Black!"**

**So Harry and Riley waved a gloomy good-bye to Nearly Headless Nick and followed Filch back downstairs, doubling the number of muddy footprints on the floor. Harry had never been inside Filch's office before; it was a place most students avoided. Riley had been in there multiple times.**

"It's a gift," Riley said with a shrug.

**The room was dingy and windowless, lit by a single oil lamp dangling from the low ceiling. A faint smell of fried fish lingered about the place. Wooden filing cabinets stood around the walls; from their labels, Harry and Riley could see that they contained details of every pupil Filch had ever punished. Fred and George Weasley had an entire drawer to themselves. **

"Eventually Riley had one too," Harry said.

**A highly polished collection of chains and manacles hung on the wall behind Filch's desk. It was common knowledge that he was always begging Dumbledore to let him suspend students by their ankles from the ceiling.**

**Filch grabbed a quill from a pot on his desk and began shuffling around looking for parchment.**

"**Dung," he muttered furiously, "great sizzling dragon bogies… frog brains… rat intestines… I've had enough of it… make an example… where's the form… yes…"**

**He retrieved a large roll of parchment from his desk drawer and stretched it out in front of him, dipping his long black quill into the ink pot.**

"**Name… Harry Potter. Crime…"**

Everyone rolled their eyes. Almost everyone has gotten in trouble with Filch for nothing.

"**It was only a bit of mud!" said Harry.**

"**It's only a bit of mud to you, boy, but to me it's an extra hour scrubbing!" shouted Filch, a drip shivering unpleasantly at the end of his bulbous nose. "Crime… befouling the castle… suggested sentence…"**

**Dabbing at his streaming nose, Filch squinted unpleasantly at Harry who waited with bated breath for his sentence to fall.**

**But as Filch lowered his quill, there was a great BANG! on the ceiling of the office, which made the oil lamp rattle.**

"A DISTRACTION!" James and Sirius yelled in unison.

Lily shook her head and said, "Now I see why Harry and Riley are like twins.

"**PEEVES!" Filch roared, flinging down his quill in a transport of rage. "I'll have you this time, I'll have you!"**

**And without a backward glance at Harry and Riley, Filch ran flat-footed from the office, Mrs. Norris streaking alongside him.**

**Peeves was the school poltergeist, a grinning, airborne menace who lived to cause havoc and distress. Harry didn't much like Peeves, but couldn't help feeling grateful for his timing. Hopefully, whatever Peeves had done (and it sounded as though he'd wrecked something very big this time) would distract Filch from Harry and Riley.**

"Good thing Hogwarts got Peeves," Thomas said.

**Thinking that they should probably wait for Filch to come back, Harry sank into a moth-eaten chair next to the desk. Riley on the other hand went looking in the drawer labeled "CAUTION!"**

"That's are drawer," Remus said fondly.

**in the filing cabinet.**

**There was only one thing on it apart from Harry's half-completed form: a large, glossy, purple envelope with silver lettering on the front. With a quick glance at the door to check that Filch wasn't on his way back, Harry picked up the envelope and read:**

**Kwikspell**

"That's odd, Filch is a Squib, he can't do magic," Arthur said.

**A Correspondence Course in Beginners' Magic.**

**Intrigued, Harry flicked the envelope open and pulled out the sheaf of parchment inside. More curly silver writing on the front page said:**

**Feel out of step in the world of modern magic? Find yourself making excuses not to perform simple spells? Ever been taunted for your woeful wandwork?**

**There is an answer!**

**Kwikspell is an all-new, fail-safe, quick-result, easy-learn course. Hundreds of witches and wizards have benefited from the Kwikspell method!**

**Madam Z. Nettles of Topsham writes:**

"**I had no memory for incantations and my potions were a family joke! Now, after a Kwikspell course, I am the center of attention at parties and friends beg for the recipe of my Scintillation Solution!"**

**Warlock D. J. Prod of Didsbury says:**

"**My wife used to sneer at my feeble charms, but one month into your fabulous Kwikspell course and I succeeded in turning her into a yak! **

"That's horrible!" Molly exclaimed.

**Thank you, Kwikspell!"**

**Fascinated, Harry thumbed through the rest of the envelope's contents. Why on earth did Filch want a Kwikspell course? Did this mean he wasn't a proper wizard? Harry was just reading Lesson One: Holding Your Wand (Some Useful Tips) when shuffling footsteps outside told him Filch was coming back. Stuffing the parchment back into the envelope, Harry threw it back onto the desk just as the door opened. Riley quickly sat down (she had read the letter over Harry's shoulder) stuffing things she found in the drawer into her robe.**

"What did you steal?" James asked eagerly.

"Just prank plans, confiscated items, and fireworks," Riley told him.

James high-fived his niece.

**Filch was looking triumphant.**

"**That vanishing cabinet was extremely valuable!" he was saying gleefully to Mrs. Norris. "We'll have Peeves out this time, my sweet —"**

"That's what everyone says," Neville said.

**His eyes fell on Harry and Riley and then darted to the Kwikspell envelope, which, Harry realized too late, was lying two feet away from where it had started.**

**Filch's pasty face went brick red. Harry and Riley braced themself for a tidal wave of fury. Filch hobbled across to his desk, snatched up the envelope, and threw it into a drawer.**

"**Have you — did you read —?" he sputtered.**

"He sounds more scared than angry," Alice said

"**No," Harry lied quickly.**

"**Why would we read someone else's mail?" Riley lied.**

**Filch's knobbly hands were twisting together.**

"**If I thought you'd read my private —not that it's mine — for a friend — be that as it may — however —"**

"What a bad liar," Sirius said.

**Harry and Riley were staring at him, alarmed; Filch had never looked madder. His eyes were popping, a tic was going in one of his pouchy cheeks, and the tartan scarf didn't help.**

"**Very well — go — and don't breathe a word — not that — however, if you didn't read — go now, I have to write up Peeves' report — go —"**

**Amazed at their luck, Harry and Riley sped out of the office, up the corridor, and back upstairs. To escape from Filch's office without punishment was probably some kind of school record.**

"**Harry! Riley! Did it work?"**

"Must be Sir Nick!" a few said.

**Nearly Headless Nick came gliding out of a classroom. Behind them, Harry could see the wreckage of a large black-and-gold cabinet that appeared to have been dropped from a great height.**

"**I persuaded Peeves to crash it right over Filch's office," said Nick eagerly. "Thought it might distract him —"**

"**Was that you?" said Harry gratefully. "Yeah, it worked, we didn't even get detention. Thanks, Nick!"**

"**Thanks Nick! We owe you one!" said Riley**

"You just had to say Riley," Ron said.

"I didn't think we'd be invited to a Deathday party," Riley said.

**They set off up the corridor together. Nearly Headless Nick, Harry noticed, was still holding Sir Patrick's rejection letter…**

"**I wish there was something I could do for you about the Headless Hunt," Harry said. Nearly Headless Nick stopped in his tracks and Harry walked right through him. **

"Why did you walk through him in the first place?" Dakota asked.

"Dunno," Harry said.

**He wished he hadn't; it was like stepping through an icy shower.**

"**But there is something you could do for me," said Nick excitedly. "Harry, Riley — would I be asking too much — but no, you wouldn't want —"**

"**What is it?" said Riley.**

"**Well, this Halloween will be my five hundredth deathday," said Nearly Headless Nick, drawing himself up and looking dignified.**

Ron shook his head.

"**Oh," said Harry and Riley, not sure whether they should look sorry or happy about this. "Right."**

"**I'm holding a party down in one of the roomier dungeons. Friends will be coming from all over the country. It would be such an honor if you two would attend. Mr. Weasley, Miss Granger, and Mr. Lupin would be most welcome, too, of course — but I daresay you'd rather go to the school feast?" He watched Harry and Riley on tenterhooks.**

"By the looks on your faces, I take it you didn't enjoy the party," Arthur said.

"**No," said Harry quickly, "We'll come —"**

"**We do owe you one," said Riley. "And it sounds fun."**

"**My dear boy! Dear girl! Harry Potter, at my deathday party! And —" he hesitated, looking excited "— do you think you could possibly mention to Sir Patrick how very frightening and impressive you find me?"**

"**Of — of course," said Harry.**

**Riley crossed her arms. Once again, it's all about Harry.**

"Were you jealous about me?"

"Kinda…"

**Nearly Headless Nick beamed at him.**

"**A deathday party?" said Hermione keenly when Harry and Riley had changed at last and joined her, Ron, and Thomas in the common room. "I bet there aren't many living people who can say they've been to one of those**

"I bet we are like five out of eleven people who have," Thomas said.

— **it'll be fascinating!"**

"**Why would anyone want to celebrate the day they died?" said Ron, who was halfway through his Potions homework and grumpy. "Sounds dead depressing to me…"**

There were snorts.

"**I think it sounds like a great," said Thomas not looking up from his book. "We should go."**

**Rain was still lashing the windows, which were now inky black, but inside all looked bright and cheerful. The firelight glowed over the countless squashy armchairs where people sat reading, talking, doing homework or, in the case of Fred and George Weasley, trying to find out what would happen if you fed a Filibuster firework to a salamander. **

James and Sirius suddenly had an idea. Remus shook his head.

**Fred had "rescued" the brilliant orange, fire-dwelling lizard from a Care of Magical Creatures class and it was now smoldering gently on a table surrounded by a knot of curious people.**

**Harry and Riley were at the point of telling Ron, Hermione, and Thomas about Filch and the Kwikspell course when the salamander suddenly whizzed into the air, emitting loud sparks and bangs as it whirled wildly round the room. The sight of Percy bellowing himself hoarse at Fred and George, the spectacular display of tangerine stars showering from the salamander's mouth, and its escape into the fire, with accompanying explosions, drove both Filch and the Kwikspell envelope from Harry's and Riley's mind.**

"Salamander fireworks do that to a person," Hermione said.

**By the time Halloween arrived, Harry was regretting his rash promise to go to the deathday party. Riley was looking rather forward to the deathday party. The rest of the school was happily anticipating their Halloween feast; the Great Hall had been decorated with the usual live bats, Hagrid's vast pumpkins had been carved into lanterns large enough for three men to sit in, and there were rumors that Dumbledore had booked a troupe of dancing skeletons for the entertainment.**

"It was true," Neville said.

"**A promise is a promise," Hermione reminded Harry bossily. "You said you'd go to the deathday party."**

**So at seven o'clock, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley walked straight past the doorway to the packed Great Hall, which was glittering invitingly with gold plates and candles, and directed their steps instead toward the dungeons.**

**The passageway leading to Nearly Headless Nick's party had been lined with candles, too, though the effect was far from cheerful: These were long, thin, jet-black tapers, all burning bright blue, casting a dim, ghostly light even over their own living faces. The temperature dropped with every step they took.**

The five had the same thought; _We should have bought our cloaks… and food._

**As Harry shivered and drew his robes tightly around him, he heard what sounded like a thousand fingernails scraping an enormous blackboard.**

"**Is that supposed to be music?" Ron whispered. They turned a corner and saw Nearly Headless Nick standing at a doorway hung with black velvet drapes.**

"**My dear friends," he said mournfully. "Welcome, welcome… so pleased you could come…"**

**He swept off his plumed hat and bowed them inside.**

**It was an incredible sight. The dungeon was full of hundreds of pearly-white, translucent people, mostly drifting around a crowded dance floor, waltzing to the dreadful, quavering sound of thirty musical saws, played by an orchestra on a raised, black-draped platform. A chandelier overhead blazed midnight-blue with a thousand more black candles. Their breath rose in a mist before them; it was like stepping into a freezer.**

"Cool…" many said.

"**Shall we have a look around?" Harry suggested, wanting to warm up his feet.**

"**Careful not to walk through anyone," said Ron nervously, and they set off around the edge of the dance floor. They passed a group of gloomy nuns, a ragged man wearing chains, and the Fat Friar, a cheerful Hufflepuff ghost, who was talking to a knight with an arrow sticking out of his forehead. Harry wasn't surprised to see that the Bloody Baron, a gaunt, staring Slytherin ghost covered in silver bloodstains, was being given a wide berth by the other ghosts.**

"**Oh, no," said Hermione, stopping abruptly. "Turn back, turn back, I don't want to talk to Moaning Myrtle —"**

"She's still there?" Dakota said.

"That sucks," Alice said.

"**Who?" said Harry as they backtracked quickly.**

"**She haunts one of the toilets in the girls' bathroom on the first floor," said Hermione.**

"**She haunts a toilet?"**

"**Yes. It's been out-of-order all year because she keeps having tantrums and flooding the place. I never went in there anyway if I could avoid it; it's awful trying to have a pee with her wailing at you."**

All the girls nodded at this.

"**It's very awkward," said Riley**

"Yet you have continued to pee in there," Hermione said.

"When you have to go Hermione, you have to go," Riley said.

"Thank you Riley for your words of wisdom."

"**Look, food!" said Ron.**

**On the other side of the dungeon was a long table, also covered in black velvet. They approached it eagerly but next moment had stopped in their tracks, horrified. The smell was quite disgusting. Large, rotten fish were laid on handsome silver platters; cakes, burned charcoal-black, were heaped on salvers; there was a great maggoty haggis, a slab of cheese covered in furry green mold and, in pride of place, **

If you took a good luck at the room you would see everyone's face had gone green.

**an enormous gray cake in the shape of a tombstone, with tar-like icing forming the words,**

**SIR NICHOLAS DE MIMSY-PORPINGTON**

**DIED 31ST OCTOBER, 1492**

**Harry watched, amazed, as a portly ghost approached the table, crouched low, and walked through it, his mouth held wide so that it passed through one of the stinking salmon.**

"**Can you taste it if you walk though it?" Harry asked him.**

"**Almost," said the ghost sadly, and he drifted away.**

"I don't think I could stand it if I couldn't eat," Ron said.

"**I expect they've let it rot to give it a stronger flavor," said Hermione knowledgeably, pinching her nose and leaning closer to look at the putrid haggis.**

"**Can we move? I feel sick," said Thomas. Riley nodded in agreement.**

**They had barely turned around, however, when a little man swooped suddenly from under the table and came to a halt in midair before them.**

"PEEVES!" everyone shouted.

"**Hello, Peeves," said Harry cautiously.**

"**Hey Peeves!" said Riley.**

**Unlike the ghosts around them, Peeves the Poltergeist was the very reverse of pale and transparent. He was wearing a bright orange party hat, a revolving bow tie, and a broad grin on his wide, wicked face.**

"**Nibbles?" he said sweetly, offering them a bowl of peanuts covered in fungus.**

**Riley stepped back. "Can't my friend, I'm allergic to them."**

"You're allergic to peanuts?" Molly asked.

"Yeah," Riley sighed.

"How did you find out?"

"Petunia told me, because apparently when I was a few months old, I ate peanut butter and nearly died."

"**No thanks," said Hermione.**

"**Heard you talking about poor Myrtle," said Peeves, his eyes dancing. **"**Rude you was about poor Myrtle." He took a deep breath and bellowed, "OY! MYRTLE!"**

"**Oh, no, Peeves, don't tell her what I said, she'll be really upset," Hermione whispered frantically. "I didn't mean it, I don't mind her — er, hello, Myrtle."**

The girls groaned.

**The squat ghost of a girl had glided over. She had the glummest face Harry had ever seen, half-hidden behind lank hair and thick, pearly spectacles.**

"**What?" she said sulkily.**

"**How are you, Myrtle?" said Hermione in a falsely bright voice. "It's nice to see you out of the toilet."**

"**Indeed!" said Riley a happy voice.**

**Myrtle sniffed.**

"**Miss Granger and Miss Black were just talking about you —" **

The girls shook their heads.

**said Peeves slyly in Myrtle's ear. "Just saying —"**

"**Just saying — saying — how nice you look tonight," said Hermione, glaring at Peeves.**

**Myrtle eyed Hermione suspiciously.**

"**You're making fun of me," she said, silver tears welling rapidly in her small, see-through eyes.**

"Gosh, I just hate Myrtle," Lily said.

"**No — honestly — didn't I just say how nice Myrtle's looking?" said Hermione, nudging Harry and Ron painfully in the ribs while Riley did the same to Thomas.**

"**Oh, yeah —"**

"**She did —"**

"**Of course-"**

"Boys," all the girls said.

"**Don't lie to me," Myrtle gasped, tears now flooding down her face, while Peeves chuckled happily over her shoulder. "D'you think I don't know what people call me behind my back? Fat Myrtle! Ugly Myrtle! Miserable, moaning, moping Myrtle!"**

"**You've forgotten pimply," Peeves hissed in her ear.**

"All true," Sirius said.

**Moaning Myrtle burst into anguished sobs and fled from the dungeon. Peeves shot after her, pelting her with moldy peanuts, yelling, "Pimply! Pimply!"**

A few let out small chuckles.

"**Oh, dear," said Hermione sadly.**

"**Definitely not going in her bathroom anymore," said Riley.**

"Yet you –"

"Shut it."

**Nearly Headless Nick now drifted toward them through the crowd.**

"**Enjoying yourselves?"**

"**Not a bad turnout," said Nearly Headless Nick proudly. "The Wailing Widow came all the way up from Kent… It's nearly time for my speech, I'd better go and warn the orchestra…"**

**The orchestra, however, stopped playing at that very moment. They, and everyone else in the dungeon, fell silent, looking around in excitement, as a hunting horn sounded.**

"**Oh, here we go," said Nearly Headless Nick bitterly.**

"What?"

"What's wrong?"

"Why's Nick upset?"

**Through the dungeon wall burst a dozen ghost horses, each ridden by a headless horseman. The assembly clapped wildly; Harry and Riley started to clap, too, but stopped quickly at the sight of Nick's face.**

**The horses galloped into the middle of the dance floor and halted, rearing and plunging. At the front of the pack was a large ghost who held his bearded head under his arm, from which position he was blowing the horn. The ghost leapt down, lifted his head high in the air so he could see over the crowd (everyone laughed), and strode over to Nearly Headless Nick, squashing his head back onto his neck.**

"**Nick!" he roared. "How are you? Head still hanging in there?"**

"Rude," Arthur said.

**He gave a hearty guffaw and clapped Nearly Headless Nick on the shoulder.**

"**Welcome, Patrick," said Nick stiffly.**

"**Live 'uns!" said Sir Patrick, spotting Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley and giving a huge, fake jump of astonishment, so that his head fell off again (the crowd howled with laughter).**

"**Very amusing," said Nearly Headless Nick darkly.**

"**Don't mind Nick!" shouted Sir Patrick's head from the floor. "Still upset we won't let him join the Hunt! But I mean to say — look at the fellow —"**

"**I think," said Harry hurriedly, at a meaningful look from Nick, "Nick's very — frightening and — er —"**

"**Ha!" yelled Sir Patrick's head.** "**Bet he asked you to say that!"**

"Well, he did," Harry asked.

"**If I could have everyone's attention, it's time for my speech!" said Nearly Headless Nick loudly, striding toward the podium and climbing into an icy blue spotlight.**

"**My late lamented lords, ladies, and gentlemen, it is my great sorrow…"**

**But nobody heard much more. Sir Patrick and the rest of the Headless Hunt had just started a game of Head Hockey and the crowd were turning to watch. **

"Poor Nick."

"Stupid Headless Hunt."

"They're ruining the party."

**Nearly Headless Nick tried vainly to recapture his audience, but gave up as Sir Patrick's head went sailing past him to loud cheers.**

**Harry was very cold by now, not to mention hungry.**

"**I can't stand much more of this," Ron muttered, his teeth chattering, as the orchestra ground back into action and the ghosts swept back onto the dance floor.**

"**Let's go," Harry agreed.**

"Good idea," James said.

**Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley backed toward the door, nodding and beaming at anyone who looked at them, and a minute later were hurrying back up the passageway full of black candles.**

"**Pudding might not be finished yet," said Riley hopefully, leading the way toward the steps to the entrance hall.**

Dakota sighed and rolled her eyes.

**And then Harry heard it.**

"… **rip… tear… kill…"**

"Oh dear," Molly said.

**It was the same voice, the same cold, murderous voice he had heard in Lockhart's office.**

**He stumbled to a halt, clutching at the stone wall, listening with all his might, looking around, squinting up and down the dimly lit passageway.**

"**Harry, what're you —?"**

"**It's that voice again — shut up a minute —"**

Remus snorted.

"… **soo hungry… for so long…"**

"**Listen!" said Harry urgently, and Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley froze, watching him.**

"… **kill… time to kill…"**

The past looked a bit frightened.

**The voice was growing fainter. Harry was sure it was moving away — moving upward. A mixture of fear and excitement gripped him as he stared at the dark ceiling; how could it be moving upward? Was it a phantom, to whom stone ceilings didn't matter?**

"**This way," he shouted, and he began to run, up the stairs, into the entrance hall. It was no good hoping to hear anything here, the babble of talk from the Halloween feast was echoing out of the Great Hall. **

"Should've ignored the voice.

**Harry sprinted up the marble staircase to the first floor, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley clattering behind him.**

"**Harry, what're we —"**

"**SHH!"**

**Harry strained his ears. Distantly, from the floor above, and growing fainter still, he heard the voice: "… I smell blood… I SMELL BLOOD!"**

**His stomach lurched —**

"**It's going to kill someone!" he shouted, and ignoring Ron's, Hermione's, Thomas's, and Riley's bewildered faces, **

Thomas shrugged and said, "You get used to Harry's weirdness after a while."

**he ran up the next flight of steps three at a time, trying to listen over his own pounding footsteps — Harry hurtled around the whole of the second floor, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley panting behind him, not stopping until they turned a corner into the last, deserted passage.**

"**Harry, what was that all about?" said Ron, wiping sweat off his face. "I couldn't hear anything…"**

"**Yeah Harry, you gave us a fright," said Thomas panting.**

"**Please don't do that again," said Riley panting, leaning on Thomas for support.**

"Man, are children are so weak!" Sirius said.

"HEY!"

"Sorry kids…"

**But Hermione gave a sudden gasp, pointing down the corridor.**

"**Look!"**

**Something was shining on the wall ahead. They approached slowly, squinting through the darkness. Foot-high words had been daubed on the wall between two windows, shimmering in the light cast by the flaming torches.**

**THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS HAS BEEN OPENED.**

**ENEMIES OF THE HEIR, BEWARE**

The past gasped. They had heard the rumors. Surely they weren't true, but then again the book title…

"**What's that thing — hanging underneath?" said Ron, a slight quiver in his voice.**

**As they edged nearer, Harry almost slipped — there was a large puddle of water on the floor; Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley grabbed him, and they inched toward the message, eyes fixed on a dark shadow beneath it. All five of them realized what it was at once, and leapt backward with a splash.**

**Mrs. Norris, the caretaker's cat, was hanging by her tail from the torch bracket. She was stiff as a board, her eyes wide and staring.**

"**Mrs. Norris," whispered Riley, her mouth gaping.**

**For a few seconds, they didn't move. Then Thomas said, "Let's get out of here."**

"Good idea," Frank said.

"**Shouldn't we try and help —" Harry began awkwardly.**

"**Trust me," said Ron. "We don't want to be found here."**

**But it was too late. **

**A rumble, as though of distant thunder, told them that the feast had just ended. From either end of the corridor where they stood came the sound of hundreds of feet climbing the stairs, and the loud, happy talk of well-fed people; next moment, students were crashing into the passage from both ends.**

"Uh-oh."

"This won't be good."

"I can't listen!"

**The chatter, the bustle, the noise died suddenly as the people in front spotted the hanging cat. Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley stood alone, in the middle of the corridor, as silence fell among the mass of students pressing forward to see the grisly sight.**

**Then someone shouted through the quiet.**

"**Enemies of the Heir, beware! You'll be next, Mudbloods!"**.

**It was Draco Malfoy. He had pushed to the front of the crowd, his cold eyes alive, his usually bloodless face flushed, as he grinned at the sight of the hanging, immobile cat.**

Everyone glared at the book. James flung the book at Lily. No one was in a good mood.

_A/N I didn't like this chapter either, this is my least favourite book. I'm still taking character suggestions._


	9. The Writing on the Wall

_A/N I do not own Harry Potter!_

Harry suddenly realized something.

"Riley! Over here!" he said motioning Riley towards a small table in the room. "Did we forget about Bill, Charlie, and Percy?"

"No, of course not, we wouldn't leave a seven, five, and one year old alone, we're not monsters," said Riley, a tiny bit offended. "Beepy is watching them, and Molly knows, so don't fret."

"Okay," said Harry. "House Elves have the weirdest names."

Riley nodded.

With that the two took their seats.

"**Chapter Nine; The Writing on the Wall**," Remus read.

The past looked mystified by this, while Riley whispered something into Neville's ear.

"**What's going on here? What's going on?"**

**Attracted no doubt by Malfoy's shout, Argus Filch** **came shouldering his way through the crowd. Then he saw Mrs. Norris and fell back, clutching his face in horror.**

"He really loves that cat," Dakota said.

"Too bad Mrs. Norris is already married," Sirius.

"**My cat! My cat! What's happened to Mrs. Norris?" he shrieked.**

**And his popping eyes fell on Harry and Riley.**

"**You two!" he screeched. "You two! You've murdered my cat! You've killed her! I'll kill you both! I'll —"**

"Yikes! I hope we get Filch this mad one day." James said to his fellow Marauders. Remus shook his head.

"**Argus!"**

**Dumbledore had arrived on the scene, followed by a number of other teachers. In seconds, he had swept past Harry, Ron, and Hermione and detached Mrs. Norris from the torch bracket.**

"**Come with me, Argus," he said to Filch. "You, too, Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, Miss Granger, Mr. Lupin, Miss Black."**

"That's a mouthful," said Frank.

**Lockhart stepped forward eagerly.**

"**My office is nearest, Headmaster — just upstairs — please feel free —"**

"At least he's being helpful," Alice said.

"**Thank you, Gilderoy," said Dumbledore.**

**The silent crowd parted to let them pass. Lockhart, looking excited and important, hurried after Dumbledore; so did Professors McGonagall and Snape.**

**As they entered Lockhart's darkened office there was a flurry of movement across the walls; Harry saw several of the Lockharts in the pictures dodging out of sight, their hair in rollers.**

Everyone burst out in laughter.

"How girly!"

"What guy puts his hair curlers?"

"Apparently Lockhart."

**The real Lockhart lit the candles on his desk and stood back. Dumbledore lay Mrs. Norris on the polished surface and began to examine her. Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley exchanged tense looks and sank into chairs outside the pool of candlelight, watching.**

**The tip of Dumbledore's long, crooked nose was barely an inch from Mrs. Norris's fur. He was looking at her closely through his half-moon spectacles, his long fingers gently prodding and poking. Professor McGonagall was bent almost as close, her eyes narrowed. Snape loomed behind them, half in shadow, wearing a most peculiar expression: It was as though he was trying hard not to smile.**

"Was he smiling about how Mrs. Norris was petrified, or the fact you guys could get in trouble?" Sirius asked.

"The obvious answer would be correct," said Ron.

**And Lockhart was hovering around all of them, making suggestions.**

"**It was definitely a curse that killed her — probably the Transmogrifian Torture — I've seen it used many times, so unlucky I wasn't there, I know the very countercurse that would have saved her…"**

"How many people bet that Mrs. Norris is not dead?" Arthur asked everyone.

Everyone from the past raised their hand.

**Lockhart's comments were punctuated by Filch's dry, racking sobs. He was slumped in a chair by the desk, unable to look at Mrs. Norris, his face in his hands. Much as he detested Filch, Harry and Riley couldn't help feeling a bit sorry for him, **

"Riley feeling sorry for someone? It's a miracle!" Ron shouted.

Riley glared at the red head and said, "Said the emotional range of a teaspoon."

Ron stuck his tongue out, as did Riley.

**though not nearly as sorry as he felt for themselves. If Dumbledore believed Filch, they would be expelled for sure.**

**Dumbledore was now muttering strange words under his breath and tapping Mrs. Norris with his wand but nothing happened. She continued to look as though she had been recently stuffed.**

"A stuffed cat," Molly muttered. "That's a new one."

"… **I remember something very similar happening in Ouagadogou," said Lockhart, "a series of attacks, the full story's in my autobiography, I was able to provide the townsfolk with various amulets, which cleared the matter up at once…"**

**The photographs of Lockhart on the walls were all nodding in agreement as he talked. One of them had forgotten to remove his hair net.**

There was more laughter.

**At last Dumbledore straightened up.**

"**She's not dead, Argus," he said softly.**

Many people smirked.

**Lockhart stopped abruptly in the middle of counting the number of murders he had prevented.**

"**Not dead?" choked Filch, looking through his fingers at Mrs. Norris. "But why's she all — all stiff and frozen?"**

"Obviously she is petrified," said Remus.

He read the next sentence.

"Yep, I was right she's petrified.

"**She has been Petrified," said Dumbledore ("Ah! I thought so!" said Lockhart).** "**But how, I cannot say…"**

"**Ask them!" shrieked Filch, turning his blotched and tearstained face to Harry and Riley.**

"It's always one of our faults," Harry groaned.

"**No second year could have done this," said Dumbledore firmly. "It would take Dark Magic of the most advanced —"**

"**They did it, they did it!" Filch spat, his pouchy face purpling. "You saw what they wrote on the wall! They found — in my office — they knows I'm a — I'm a —" Filch's face worked horribly. "They knows I'm a Squib!" he finished.**

"Yes," said Riley sarcastically. "We petrified Mrs. Norris because you are a squib, it makes sense.

"**We never touched Mrs. Norris!" Harry said loudly, uncomfortably aware of everyone looking at him, including all the Lockharts on the walls. "And we don't even know what a Squib is."**

"**Rubbish!" snarled Filch. "They saw my Kwikspell letter!"**

"Filch is stupid," James said. "No one randomly petrifies a Squib's pet cat.

"**If I might speak, Headmaster," said Snape from the shadows, and Harry's and Riley's sense of foreboding increased; they were sure nothing Snape had to say was going to do them any good.**

"**Potter, Black, and their friends may have simply been in the wrong place at the wrong time," he said, a slight sneer curling his mouth as though he doubted it. "But we do have a set of suspicious circumstances here. Why were they in the upstairs corridor at all? Why weren't they at the Halloween feast?"**

"I hate it when this guy has a point," said Dakota.

**Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley all launched into an explanation about the Deathday party. "… there were hundreds of ghosts, they'll tell you we were there…"**

"**But why not join the feast afterward?" said Snape, his black eyes glittering in the candlelight. "Why go up to that corridor?"**

"I hope you find a good excuse."

"Like, the hallways switched places."

"Or Fluffy chased you guys around the castle."

**Ron, Hermione, and Thomas looked at Harry and Riley.**

"Why do you guys always think we have all the answers?" Harry and Riley said together.

"Okay you guys need to stop talking at the same time," Hermione said.

"Sorry."

"**Because — because —" Harry said, his heart thumping very fast; something told him it would sound very far-fetched if he told them he had been led there by a bodiless voice no one but he could hear, "because we were tired and wanted to go to bed," he said.**

"**Without any supper?" said Snape, a triumphant smile flickering across his gaunt face. "I didn't think ghosts provided food fit for living people at their parties."**

"They don't," said Lily

"**We weren't hungry," said Ron loudly as his stomach gave a huge rumble. Riley smacked her forehead.**

"Subtle," many muttered.

**Snape's nasty smile widened.**

"**I suggest, Headmaster, that Potter is not being entirely truthful," he said. "It might be a good idea if he and Black were deprived of certain privileges until they are ready to tell us the whole story. I personally feel they should be taken off the Gryffindor Quidditch team until they are ready to be honest."**

"That punishment makes no sense at all!" exclaimed Sirius.

"**Really, Severus," said Professor McGonagall sharply, "I see no reason to stop the two playing Quidditch. This cat wasn't hit over the head with a broomstick. There is no evidence at all that Potter or Black has done anything wrong."**

**Dumbledore was giving Harry and Riley a searching look. His twinkling light-blue gaze made Harry and Riley feel as though they were being X-rayed.**

"I hate it when he does that," James shuddered.

"**Innocent until proven guilty, Severus," he said firmly.**

**Snape looked furious.**

"He always looks furious," Frank pointed out.

**So did Filch.**

"So does he."

"**My cat has been Petrified!" he shrieked, his eyes popping. "I want to see some punishment!"**

"**We will be able to cure her, Argus," said Dumbledore patiently. "Professor Sprout recently managed to procure some Mandrakes. As soon as they have reached their full size, I will have a potion made that will revive Mrs. Norris."**

"**I'll make it," Lockhart butted in. "I must have done it a hundred times. I could whip up a Mandrake Restorative Draught in my sleep —"**

Everyone rolled their eyes.

"**Excuse me," said Snape icily. "But I believe I am the Potions master at this school."**

**There was a very awkward pause.**

"Awkward…" said Sirius.

Riley's head turned in the direction of her father.

"**Awkward…" said Riley quietly.**

Sirius looked at his daughter.

"**You may go," Dumbledore said to Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley.**

**They went, as quickly as they could without actually running. When they were a floor up from Lockhart's office, they turned into an empty classroom and closed the door quietly behind them. Harry squinted at his friends' darkened faces.**

"**D'you think I should have told them about that voice I heard?"**

"Not there," said Remus, "maybe in private with Dumbledore though."

"**No," said Ron, without hesitation. "Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world."**

**Something in Ron's voice made Harry ask, "You do believe me, don't you?"**

"Of course we did," said Thomas.

"'**Course I do," said Ron quickly. "But — you must admit it's weird…"**

"**I know it's weird," said Harry. "The whole thing's weird. What was that writing on the wall about? The Chamber Has Been Opened… What's that supposed to mean?"**

"It means the Chamber of Secrets has been opened," said Dakota. "That's not good.

"**You know, it rings a sort of bell," said Ron slowly. "I think someone told me a story about a secret chamber at Hogwarts once… might've been Bill…"**

"**And what on earth's a Squib?" said Riley.**

**To her surprise, Ron and Thomas stifled a snigger.**

"It's not funny!" Molly scolded.

Remus shook his head.

"**Well — it's not funny really — but as it's Filch," said Thomas. "A Squib is someone who was born into a wizarding family but hasn't got any magic powers. Kind of the opposite of Muggle-born wizards, but Squibs are quite unusual. If Filch's trying to learn magic from a Kwikspell course, I reckon he must be a Squib. It would explain a lot. Like why he hates students so much." Thomas gave a satisfied smile. "He's bitter."**

"Filch must have been disowned from his family," Alice said.

**A clock chimed somewhere.**

"**Midnight," said Riley.**

"**We'd better get to bed before Snape comes along and tries to frame us for something else."**

"Like he does every other week," said Riley.

**For a few days, the school could talk of little else but the attack on Mrs. Norris. Filch kept it fresh in everyone's minds by pacing the spot where she had been attacked, as though he thought the attacker might come back. Harry and Riley had seen him scrubbing the message on the wall with Mrs. Skower's All-Purpose Magical Mess Remover, but to no effect; the words still gleamed as brightly as ever on the stone.**

**When Filch wasn't guarding the scene of the crime, he was skulking red-eyed through the corridors, lunging out at unsuspecting students and trying to put them in detention for things like 'breathing loudly' and 'looking happy'.**

"That's a new low," said Arthur.

**Ginny Weasley seemed very disturbed by Mrs. Norris's fate. According to Ron, she was a great cat lover.**

Ron looked down, if only he and the others had caught on sooner.

"**But you haven't really got to know Mrs. Norris," Ron told her bracingly. "Honestly, we're much better off without her." Ginny's lip trembled. "Stuff like this doesn't often happen at Hogwarts," Ron assured her. "They'll catch the maniac who did it and have him out of here in no time. I just hope he's got time to Petrify Filch before he's expelled. I'm only joking —" Ron added hastily as Ginny blanched. Riley smacked Ron for that one.**

**The attack had also had an effect on Hermione and Thomas. It was quite usual for Hermione to spend a lot of time reading, but she was now doing almost nothing else. Riley knew Thomas liked to read, but he rarely read when she's hanging out with him. **

"That's the same with Remmy!" said Sirius.

**Nor could Harry, Ron, and Riley get much response from them when they asked what they were up to, and not until the following Wednesday did they find out.**

**Harry had been held back in Potions, where Snape had made him stay behind to scrape tubeworms off the desks. After a hurried lunch, he went upstairs to meet Ron and Riley in the library, and saw Justin Finch-Fletchley, the Hufflepuff boy from Herbology, coming toward him. Harry had just opened his mouth to say hello when Justin caught sight of him, turned abruptly, and sped off in the opposite direction.**

"Well that was rude," Lily said.

**Harry found Ron and Riley at the back of the library, measuring their History of Magic homework. Professor Binns had asked for a three foot long composition on "The Medieval Assembly of European Wizards."**

"**I don't believe it, I'm still eight inches short," said Ron furiously, letting go of his parchment, which sprang back into a roll. "And Hermione's done four feet seven inches and her writing's tiny."**

"Overachiever," Ron muttered under his breath.

"**Where is she?" asked Harry, grabbing the tape measure and unrolling his own homework.**

"**And Thomas," said Riley scrawling across her scroll. "He's supposed to be helping me with my homework."**

"Er… sorry about that, Riley."

"It's fine, I only got a three and a half out of ten on it, Thomas."

"I can sense your sarcasm."

"**Somewhere over there," said Ron, pointing along the shelves. "Looking for another book. I think they are trying to read the whole library before Christmas."**

**Harry told Ron and Riley about Justin Finch-Fletchley running away from him.**

"**Dunno why you care. I thought he was a bit of an idiot," said Ron, scribbling away, making his writing as large as possible. "All that junk about Lockhart being so great —"**

"People will believe anything," said Molly.

"That reminds me," said Harry to Molly. "Don't believe everything you read in Witch Weekly. And don't read things by Rita Skeeter."

**Hermione and Thomas emerged from between the bookshelves. They looked irritable and at last seemed ready to talk to them.**

"**All the copies of Hogwarts, A History have been taken out," Hermione said, sitting down next to Harry and Ron. Thomas took the seat next to Riley.** "**And there's a two-week waiting list. I wish I hadn't left my copy at home, **

"How come you want the book?" asked Dakota.

**but I couldn't fit it in my trunk with all the Lockhart books."**

"**I knew I should have bought the book back in our first year!" said Thomas with a frustrated look on his face.**

"You wouldn't have read anyway," muttered Riley.

"**Why do you want it?" said Harry.**

"**The same reason everyone else wants it," said Hermione, "to read up on the legend of the Chamber of Secrets."**

"**What's that?" said Harry quickly.**

"**That's just it. I can't remember," said Hermione, biting her lip. **"**And I can't find the story anywhere else —"**

"You could have asked one of the ghosts," said Arthur.

"Eventually we did," said Hermione.

"**Hermione, let me read your composition," said Ron desperately, checking his watch.**

"**No, I won't," said Hermione, suddenly severe. "You've had ten days to finish it —"**

"**I only need another two inches, come on —"**

**The bell rang. Ron and Hermione led the way to History of Magic, bickering. Riley rolled her eyes and whispered something in Thomas's ear that made them both snicker.**

"What did you say?" said Ron and Hermione in unison.

"Oh, I said you two argued like an old married couple," said Riley.

"Hey!"

**History of Magic was the dullest subject on their schedule. Professor Binns, who taught it, was their only ghost teacher, and the most exciting thing that ever happened in his classes was his entering the room through the blackboard. **

"That's pretty much the reason everyone sleeps or doodles," said Thomas.

**Ancient and shriveled, many people said he hadn't noticed he was dead. He had simply got up to teach one day and left his body behind him in an armchair in front of the staff room fire; his routine had not varied in the slightest since.**

**Today was as boring as ever. Professor Binns opened his notes and began to read in a flat drone like an old vacuum cleaner until nearly everyone in the class was in a deep stupor, occasionally coming to long enough to copy down a name or date, then falling asleep again. He had been speaking for half an hour when something happened that had never happened before. Hermione put up her hand.**

Everyone from the past gasped.

**Professor Binns, glancing up in the middle of a deadly dull lecture on the International Warlock Convention of 1289, looked amazed.**

"**Miss — er —?"**

"**Granger, Professor. I was wondering if you could tell us anything about the Chamber of Secrets," said Hermione in a clear voice.**

**Dean Thomas, who had been sitting with his mouth hanging open, gazing out of the window, jerked out of his trance; Lavender Brown's head came up off her arms and Neville Longbottom's elbow slipped off his desk.**

"And that is how you snap people out of trances in History of Magic," said James.

**Professor Binns blinked.**

"**My subject is History of Magic," he said in his dry, wheezy voice. "I deal with facts, Miss Granger, not myths and legends." He cleared his throat with a small noise like chalk slipping and continued, "In September of that year, a subcommittee of Sardinian sorcerers —"**

**He stuttered to a halt. Thomas's hand was in the air.**

"**Mr. Lycan?"**

"I felt offended when he said that," said Thomas.

"**It's Lupin. ****Please, sir, don't legends always have a basis in fact?"**

**Professor Binns was looking at him in such amazement, Harry and Riley were sure no student had ever interrupted him before, alive or dead.**

"**Well," said Professor Binns slowly, "yes, one could argue that, I suppose." He peered at Thomas as though he had never seen a student properly before.**

"I bet he thinks that he's teaching us instead of you guys," said Sirius.

"Darn our similar features," said Riley.

"**However, the legend of which you speak is such a very sensational, even ludicrous tale —"**

**But the whole class was now hanging on Professor Binns's every word. He looked dimly at them all, every face turned to his. Harry and Riley could tell he was completely thrown by such an unusual show of interest.**

"It's a good thing you can't surprise a ghost to death," said Lily.

"**Oh, very well," he said slowly. "Let me see… the Chamber of Secrets…**

"**You all know, of course, that Hogwarts was founded over a thousand years ago — the precise date is uncertain — by the four greatest witches and wizards of the age. The four school Houses are named after them: Godric Gryffindor, Helga Hufflepuff, Rowena Ravenclaw, and Salazar Slytherin. They built this castle together, far from prying Muggle eyes, for it was an age when magic was feared by common people, and witches and wizards suffered much persecution."**

**He paused, gazed blearily around the room, and continued.**

"**For a few years, the founders worked in harmony together, seeking out youngsters who showed signs of magic and bringing them to the castle to be educated. But then disagreements sprang up between them. A rift began to grow between Slytherin and the others. Slytherin wished to be more selective about the students admitted to Hogwarts. He believed that magical learning should be kept within all-magic families. He disliked taking students of Muggle parentage, believing them to be untrustworthy. After a while, there was a serious argument on the subject between Slytherin and Gryffindor, and Slytherin left the school."**

"Yeah, yeah, we know, get to the Chamber of Secrets part already," said Frank.

**Professor Binns paused again, pursing his lips, looking like a wrinkled old tortoise.**

"**Reliable historical sources tell us this much," he said. "But these honest facts have been obscured by the fanciful legend of the Chamber of Secrets. The story goes that Slytherin had built a hidden chamber in the castle, of which the other founders knew nothing.**

"**Slytherin, according to the legend, sealed the Chamber of Secrets so that none would be able to open it until his own true heir arrived at the school. The heir alone would be able to unseal the Chamber of Secrets, unleash the horror within, and use it to purge the school of all who were unworthy to study magic."**

Silence filled the room.

**There was silence as he finished telling the story, but it wasn't the usual, sleepy silence that filled Professor Binns's classes. There was unease in the air as everyone continued to watch him, hoping for more. Professor Binns looked faintly annoyed.**

"**The whole thing is arrant nonsense, of course," he said. "Naturally, the school has been searched for evidence of such a chamber, many times, by the most learned witches and wizards. It does not exist. A tale told to frighten the gullible."**

**To everyone's surprise Riley raised her hand.**

Everyone gasped but Riley. Even Teddy gasped.

"Ha, ha," said Riley sarcastically.

"**Yes Miss Bruin?" said Professor Binns.**

Sirius made a weird face.

"**It's Black, and ****Sir — what exactly do you mean by the 'horror within' the Chamber?" asked Riley.**

"**That is believed to be some sort of monster, which the Heir of Slytherin alone can control," said Professor Binns in his dry, reedy voice.**

**The class exchanged nervous looks.**

"Why wouldn't they?"

"I'd be nervous to."

"I'm already nervous."

"**I tell you, the thing does not exist," said Professor Binns, shuffling his notes. "There is no Chamber and no monster."**

A certain six snorted.

"**But, sir," said Seamus Finnigan, "if the Chamber can only be opened by Slytherin's true heir, no one else would be able to find it, would they?"**

"**Nonsense, O'Flaherty," said Professor Binns in an aggravated tone. "If a long succession of Hogwarts headmasters and headmistresses haven't found the thing —"**

"'Cause they weren't the heir of Slytherin," Harry muttered under his breath.

"**But, Professor," piped up Parvati Patil, "you'd probably have to use Dark Magic to open it —"**

"**Just because a wizard doesn't use Dark Magic doesn't mean he can't, Miss Pennyfeather," snapped Professor Binns. "I repeat, if the likes of Dumbledore —"**

"**But maybe you've got to be related to Slytherin,**

"Yeah, that would make sense," said Remus.

**so Dumbledore couldn't —" began Dean Thomas, but Professor Binns had had enough.**

"**That will do," he said sharply. "It is a myth! It does not exist! There is not a shred of evidence that Slytherin ever built so much as a secret broom cupboard! I regret telling you such a foolish story! We will return, if you please, to history, to solid, believable, verifiable fact!"**

**And within five minutes, the class had sunk back into its usual torpor.**

"And everything is back to normal," said Alice.

"**I always knew Salazar Slytherin was a twisted old loony," Ron told Harry, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley as they fought their way through the teeming corridors at the end of the lesson to drop off their bags before dinner. "But I never knew he started all this pure-blood stuff. I wouldn't be in his house if you paid me. Honestly, if the Sorting Hat had tried to put me in Slytherin, I'd've got the train straight back home…"**

"I hate Slytherins," said Ron.

"I bet Slytherins will be nicer in the future," said Neville.

**Hermione, Thomas, and Riley nodded fervently, but Harry didn't say anything. His stomach had just dropped unpleasantly.**

**Harry had never told Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley that the Sorting Hat had seriously considered putting him in Slytherin. He could remember, as though it were yesterday, the small voice that had spoken in his ear when he'd placed the hat on his head a year before: You could be great, you know, it's all here in your head, and Slytherin would help you on the way to greatness, no doubt about that…**

"The Sorting Hat can be so persuasive," said Harry.

**But Harry, who had already heard of Slytherin House's reputation for turning out Dark wizards, had thought desperately, 'Not Slytherin!' and the hat had said, 'Oh, well, if you're sure… better be Gryffindor'…**

**As they were shunted along in the throng, Colin Creevy went past.**

James and Sirius groaned.

"**Hiya, Harry!"**

"**Hullo, Colin," said Harry automatically.**

"**Harry — Harry — a boy in my class has been saying you're —"**

**But Colin was so small he couldn't fight against the tide of people bearing him toward the Great Hall; they heard him squeak, "See you, Harry!" and he was gone.**

"The amazing things crowds of people can do," said Frank.

"**What's a boy in his class saying about you?" Hermione wondered.**

"**That I'm Slytherin's heir, I expect," said Harry, his stomach dropping another inch or so as he suddenly remembered the way Justin Finch-Fletchley had run away from him at lunchtime.**

"**People will believe anything," said Riley smirking. "I told a bunch of firsties that Binns doesn't know he's dead. From what my friend Alex told me, half the class got detentions for asking Binns if he was aware he was dead."**

James and Sirius fist-bumped Riley.

"**That's mean!" said Hermione.**

"**But it's funny!"**

**The crowd thinned and they were able to climb the next staircase without difficulty.**

"**D'you really think there's a Chamber of Secrets?"**

"I do!"

"I bet there is."

"I'm still nervous."

**Ron asked Hermione.**

"**I don't know," she said, frowning. "Dumbledore couldn't cure Mrs. Norris, and that makes me think that whatever attacked her might not be — well — human."**

"They weren't," muttered Neville.

**As she spoke, they turned a corner and found themselves at the end of the very corridor where the attack had happened. They stopped and looked. The scene was just as it had been that night, except that there was no stiff cat hanging from the torch bracket, and an empty chair stood against the wall bearing the message "The Chamber of Secrets has been Opened."**

"**That's where Filch has been keeping guard," Ron muttered.**

**They looked at each other. The corridor was deserted.**

"**Can't hurt to have a poke around," said Harry, dropping his bag and getting to his hands and knees so that he could crawl along, searching for clues.**

"Why do you guys go and poke your noses in other people's business," Lily groaned.

"**Scorch marks!" he said. "Here — and here —"**

"**Come and look at this!" said Hermione. "This is funny…"**

"**How is that funny?" said Thomas.**

"What's so funny?" many people asked.

**Harry got up and crossed to the window next to the message on the wall. Hermione was pointing at the topmost pane, where around twenty spiders were scuttling, apparently fighting to get through a small crack. A long, silvery thread was dangling like a rope, as though they had all climbed it in their hurry to get outside.**

Ron violently shuddered.

"**Have you ever seen spiders act like that?" said Hermione wonderingly.**

"**No," said Harry, "have you, Ron? Ron?"**

**He looked over his shoulder. Ron was standing well back and seemed to be fighting the impulse to run.**

"I was."

"**What's up?" said Harry.**

"**I — don't — like — spiders," said Ron tensely.**

**Riley decided against snickering this one time.**

"Thanks Riley," said Ron.

"I was able to sense there was a traumatizing backstory," said Riley.

"**I never knew that," said Hermione, looking at Ron in surprise. "You've used spiders in Potions loads of times…"**

"**I don't mind them dead," said Ron, who was carefully looking anywhere but at the window. "I just don't like the way they move…"**

"**Besides when they're dead they can't get you," said Thomas with a grin.**

Remus shook his head.

**Hermione and Riley giggled.**

"**It's not funny," said Ron, fiercely. "If you must know, when I was three, Fred turned my — my teddy bear into a great big filthy spider because I broke his toy broomstick… You wouldn't like them either if you'd been holding your bear and suddenly it had too many legs and…"**

**He broke off, shuddering. Hermione was obviously still trying not to laugh.**

**Riley put a hand on Ron's shoulder and said, "Fred is a bit cruel when it comes to revenge isn't he?"**

"Yep."

"It's scary."

"I was scared of him."

"You had to be careful around him."

"He was the best at revenge…"

**Riley's remembered when she had accidently set fire to Fred's pants. For revenge he dropped her into the lake – in mid-winter. From then on Riley vowed to be better at revenge then Fred.**

**Feeling they had better get off the subject, Harry said, "Remember all that water on the floor? Where did that come from? Someone's mopped it up."**

"That's Filch's job," said Neville.

"**It was about here," said Ron, recovering himself to walk a few paces past Filch's chair and pointing. "Level with this door."**

**He reached for the brass doorknob but suddenly withdrew his hand as though he'd been burned.**

"**What's the matter?" said Harry.**

"**Aren't you going in?" said Thomas.**

"**Can't go in there," said Ron gruffly. "That's a girls' toilet."**

There were a few laughs.

"**Oh, Ron, there won't be anyone in there," said Hermione standing up and coming over. "That's Moaning Myrtle's place. Come on, let's have a look."**

"**No one ever goes to the bathroom in here anymore," said Riley following Hermione. "Don't be wimps."**

All the girls groaned.

"I can never go in there," said Lily.

"I'm not allowed in there," said Alice. "Myrtle banished me."

"Myrtle hates me," said Dakota.

"I'm just glad I never went into her bathroom.

**And ignoring the large OUT OF ORDER sign, Hermione opened the door.**

**It was the gloomiest, most depressing bathroom Harry had ever set foot in. **

"You went in!" exclaimed Sirius, James, and Frank.

**Under a large, cracked, and spotted mirror were a row of chipped sinks. The floor was damp and reflected the dull light given off by the stubs of a few candles, burning low in their holders; the wooden doors to the stalls were flaking and scratched and one of them was dangling off its hinges.**

**Hermione put her fingers to her lips and set off toward the end stall with Riley. When they reached it Hermione said, "Hello, Myrtle, how are you?"**

"**Hey Myrtle, what's happening?" said Riley.**

"I hate having to be fake nice," said Hermione.

"I hate being nice to her," said Riley.

**Harry, Ron, and Thomas went to look. Moaning Myrtle was floating above the tank of the toilet, picking a spot on her chin.**

"**This is a girls' bathroom," she said, eyeing Ron, Harry, and Thomas suspiciously. "They're not girls."**

"We aren't?"

"I'm not?"

"I never knew."

"You guys are weird."

"**No," Hermione agreed. "I just wanted to show them how er — nice it is in here."**

**She waved vaguely at the dirty old mirror and the damp floor.**

"Subtle," said Arthur.

"**Ask her if she saw anything," Harry mouthed at Hermione.**

"**What are you whispering?" said Myrtle, staring at him.**

"**Nothing," said Harry quickly. "We wanted to ask —"**

"**I wish people would stop talking behind my back!" said Myrtle, in a voice choked with tears. "I do have feelings, you know, even if I am dead —"**

"She is so overdramatic," said Thomas.

Others nodded in agreement.

"**And paranoid…" Riley muttered under her breath.**

"**Myrtle, no one wants to upset you," said Hermione. "Harry only —"**

"**No one wants to upset me! That's a good one!" howled Myrtle. "My life was nothing but misery at this place and now people come along ruining my death!"**

"We can't help what happens after her death," said Dakota.

"**We wanted to ask you if you've seen anything funny lately," said Hermione quickly. "Because a cat was attacked right outside your front door on Halloween."**

"**Did you see anyone near here that night?" said Harry.**

"**I wasn't paying attention," said Myrtle dramatically. "Peeves upset me so much I came in here and tried to kill myself. Then, of course, I remembered that I'm — that I'm —"**

"**Already dead," said Ron helpfully.**

"How is that helpful?"

"You are so thick Ron."

"Idiot."

"**Ron!" said Thomas.**

**Myrtle gave a tragic sob, rose up in the air, turned over, and dived headfirst into the toilet, splashing water all over them and vanishing from sight, although from the direction of her muffled sobs, she had come to rest somewhere in the U-bend.**

**Harry, Ron, and Thomas stood with their mouths open, Riley just rolled her eyes, but Hermione shrugged wearily and said, "Honestly, that was almost cheerful for Myrtle**

"Agreed," said Riley.

… **Come on, let's go."**

**Harry had barely closed the door on Myrtle's gurgling sobs when a loud voice made all five of them jump.**

"**RON!"**

**Percy Weasley had stopped dead at the head of the stairs, prefect badge agleam, an expression of complete shock on his face.**

Everyone groaned except Arthur and Molly.

"**That's a girls' bathroom!" he gasped. "What were you —?"**

"**Just having a look around," Ron shrugged. "Clues, you know —"**

**Percy swelled in a manner that reminded Harry and Riley forcefully of Mrs. Weasley.**

Molly scowled.

"**Get — away — from — there —" Perry said, striding toward them and starting to bustle them along, flapping his arms. "Don't you care what this looks like? Coming back here while everyone's at dinner-"**

"**Why shouldn't we be here?" said Ron hotly, stopping short and glaring at Percy. "Listen, we never laid a finger on that cat!"**

"**That's what I told Ginny," said Percy fiercely, "but she still seems to think you're going to be expelled, I've never seen her so upset, crying her eyes out, you might think of her, all the first years are thoroughly overexcited by this business —"**

"**You don't care about Ginny," said Ron, whose ears were now reddening. "You're just worried I'm going to mess up your chances of being Head Boy —"**

"It's was true," said Ron.

"**Five points from Gryffindor!" Percy said tersely, fingering his prefect badge. "And I hope it teaches you a lesson! No more detective work, or I'll write to Mum!"**

**And he strode off, the back of his neck as red as Ron's ears.**

"**Git…" was all Riley muttered.**

Ron and Riley fist-bumped.

**Harry, Ron, Hermione, Thomas, and Riley chose seats as far as possible from Percy in the common room that night. Ron was still in a very bad temper and kept blotting his Charms homework. When he reached absently for his wand to remove the smudges, it ignited the parchment. Fuming almost as much as his homework, Ron slammed The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 2 shut. To Harry, Riley, and Thomas's surprise, Hermione followed suit.**

"**Who can it be, though?" she said in a quiet voice, as though continuing a conversation they had just been having. **"**Who'd want to frighten all the Squibs and Muggle-borns out of Hogwarts?"**

"**Let's think," said Ron in mock puzzlement. "Who do we know who thinks Muggle-borns are scum?"**

"All Slytherins," said James.

"Malfoy's," said Alice.

"My family," said Sirius.

**He looked at Hermione. Hermione looked back, unconvinced.**

"**If you're talking about Malfoy —"**

"**Of course I am!" said Ron. "You heard him — 'You'll be next, Mudbloods!'— come on, you've only got to look at his foul rat face to know it's him —"**

"His face always seemed ferret-like," said Riley.

A certain six snickered, leaving the people of the past in confusion.

"**Malfoy, the Heir of Slytherin?" said Hermione skeptically.**

"**It makes senses, Herms!" said Riley. "Simple logic."**

"**Look at his family," said Harry, closing his books, too. "The whole lot of them have been in Slytherin; he's always boasting about it. They could easily be Slytherin's descendants. His father's definitely evil enough."**

Many nodded in agreement.

"**They could've had the key to the Chamber of Secrets for centuries!" said Ron. "Handing it down, father to son…"**

"**Well," said Hermione cautiously, "I suppose it's possible…"**

**Thomas shrugged.**

"**But how do we prove it?" said Harry darkly.**

Remus and Lily thought hard.

"Stalking?" Lily suggested.

"Photographs?" said Remus.

"Invisibility Cloak?"

"Snooping?"

"Taking Draco hostage!" exclaimed Sirius.

"**There might be a way," said Hermione slowly, dropping her voice still further with a quick glance across the room at Percy. "Of course, it would be difficult. And dangerous, very dangerous. We'd be breaking about fifty school rules, I expect —"**

"**If, in a month or so, you feel like explaining, you will let us know, won't you?" said Ron irritably. Riley sharply elbowed him in the ribs.**

"It still hurts to this day," said Ron.

"**All right," said Hermione coldly. "What we'd need to do is to get inside the Slytherin common room and ask Malfoy a few questions without him realizing it's us."**

"**But that's impossible," Harry said as Ron laughed.**

"**No, it's not," said Hermione. "All we'd need would be some Polyjuice Potion."**

"Aw, why didn't we think of that, Lily?" said Remus.

"**What's that?" said Ron and Harry together. Thomas raised an eyebrow.**

"**Snape mentioned it in class a few weeks ago —"**

"**D'you think we've got nothing better to do in Potions than listen to Snape?" muttered Ron.**

**Riley rolled her eyes and said, "I remember… Gee it's definitely going to be complicated."**

"But no Potion is too complicated for you," said James.

"Thanks Uncle James!" said Riley.

"**It transforms you into somebody else." said Hermione. "Think about it! We could change into five of the Slytherins. No one would know it was us. Malfoy would probably tell us anything. He's probably boasting about it in the Slytherin common room right now, if only we could hear him."**

"**This Polyjuice stuff sounds a bit dodgy to me," said Ron, frowning. "What if we were stuck looking like five of the Slytherins forever?"**

"**It wears off after a while," said Riley, waving her hand impatiently. "But getting hold of the recipe will be very difficult. Snape said it was in a book called Moste Potente Potions and it's bound to be in the Restricted Section of the library." There was only one way to get out a book from the Restricted Section: You needed a signed note of permission from a teacher.**

"**Hard to see why we'd want the book, really," said Ron, "if we weren't going to try and make one of the potions."**

"Ron has a point," said Arthur.

"**I think," said Hermione, "that if we made it sound as though we were just interested in the theory, we might stand a chance…"**

"**Oh, come on, no teacher's going to fall for that," said Ron. "They'd have to be really thick…"**

"Lockhart," many said through coughs.

"**Who's the thickest teacher we know?" said Thomas.**

"**Lockhart, of course," said Riley.**

Remus handed the book to Sirius.

Sirius grinned evilly. "I can't wait to read how you guys trick Lockhart.


End file.
